


A Stone by Any Other Name

by Silvarbelle



Category: Fullmetal Alchemist, Xiaolin Showdown (Cartoon)
Genre: Crossover, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-18
Updated: 2012-05-18
Packaged: 2017-11-05 14:32:43
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 61,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/407523
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Silvarbelle/pseuds/Silvarbelle
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ed Elric has searched long and hard for the Philosopher's Stone.  Roy Mustang promised to help him find it in exchange for working for him.  It looks like the promise is about to be kept - until they discover the thing they've gone to acquire is actually the key to opening a door to a parallel world where alchemy is long dead and the new magical toys are things called Shen-Gong-Wu.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Stone by Any Other Name

**Author's Note:**

> This story was written as a gift for Amelie Belcher a million years ago.

There was subtle and then there was Ed.

_Never shall the two meet,_ thought Roy Mustang as Edward Elric shoved the double-doors to the colonel’s office wide open. The force the younger alchemist used to open the doors literally had them bouncing off the walls and shuddering on their hinge-pins.

“Alright, Colonel Bastard, I’m here,” grumbled Ed as he stepped into the room. He was swathed, as usual, in his red coat with the Flamel Serpent Cross on the back of it.

“Thank you for taking the time out of your busy schedule of figuring out how to grow another inch taller,” Mustang retorted, simply because it was so easy and so much fun to wind Ed up to the back-rafters.

“ _Who are you calling so short he couldn’t qualify to go on the rides at a county fair?!_ ” Ed bellowed instantly. His mouth was open wide, his hands curled into fists, his entire body straining in his indignant fury.

Roy felt the electric rush of knowing he was facing imminent death, and thought it was funny that nowadays he associated Death with gold rather than red as he looked into Ed’s sparkling, fury-filled eyes.

“You’d qualify,” he murmured with a slow smile, “for the _kiddie_ rides.”

“You—!“ Ed was so angry now that he couldn’t speak. He made a garbled, snarling noise in his throat, and clapped his hands together.

Immediately, Mustang held up the folder on his desk and said, “Go ahead, take a shot – but this very, _very_ promising lead on the Philosopher’s Stone will be the first to take the hit.”

He almost laughed when Ed very obviously debated with himself if smiting his commanding officer would be worth the loss of the information.

Roy waved the folder languidly. “This is the best lead _yet_ , Ed. I mean it: the _best_.”

Ed glared hard at the older alchemist. He could still feel the energy he’d called up thrumming against his pressed-together palms. “So good you’d stake your commission on it?”

To his surprise, Roy nodded, his expression now completely serious.

Another few moments, and then Ed relented. He willed the energy back into submission as he pulled his hands apart and dropped them to his side before storming forward to snatch the folder from Mustang’s hand.

As he settled on one of the sofa’s in the colonel’s office, he heard Roy stand up and stretch, but didn’t look up.

“Alphonse still in Risembool?” asked Mustang casually as he walked over to his private coffee pot. He poured a mug for himself and one for Ed. He tapped a half-spoon of sugar into his own mug, but dropped in two full spoons of sugar for Ed. He stirred them both and then carried a mug over to Ed, who accepted the mug with a grunt of acknowledgement, still not looking up.

“Yeah,” muttered Ed, focusing just enough attention to answer Mustang’s question. “He and Armstrong ought to be catching the train later this afternoon.”

“Al’s been spending quite a bit of time in Risembool, lately,” Roy mentioned quietly. He settled onto the sofa, positioned directly across from Ed, and kept his gaze firmly on the younger alchemist.

“Mmm.” Ed was reading, reading, reading about reports of a red stone fixed to the top spire of a Xingian-style temple. No matter how hard anyone tried, they couldn’t remove the stone or the spire it was perched on.

“Ed…”

“Uh?” This was way too good to be true. No possible way this strange-looking red rock with four large pointed rays and four smaller rays interspersed between them could be the actual Philosopher’s Stone. It was just too much to hope for.

Roy smiled and rested his right cheek against the knuckles of his right hand. “Do you suppose Winry already has her wedding dress picked out?”

“Um. Probably. She’s kinda weird for all that she’s—“ Ed’s head snapped up as his mind jumped tracks from stones to dresses. “The _hell_ …?”

“Glad I have your attention, finally,” said Roy with a smirk, and he took a sip of coffee.

“Why the hell would you ask something like that? Winry’s an automail mechanic!” growled Ed, flustered by the question.

“That doesn’t prevent her from wearing dresses,” Roy pointed out reasonably. “She looked very lovely the last time I saw her.”

“The last time you saw her, she was twelve-years-old! You dirty pervert!”

Roy rolled his eyes. “I can compliment a lady without wanting to have sex with her, Elric.”

“From anyone else, I’d believe that. But this is _you_ ; even your _alchemy_ notes are women’s names!”

Roy merely grinned.

Ed scowled. He _hated_ the way Roy looked so young when he smiled like that. “What’d you ask about wedding dresses for, anyway? She’s only sixteen!”

“Well, she and Al _have_ been spending a lot of time together—“

“Which has all been perfectly clean! It’s not like they _could_ do anything while he’s… y’know.”

Roy nodded. Knowing Ed like he did, he could see the shadow of guilt slip in and darken those gold eyes; never far from the elder Elric brother when thinking of his beloved sibling.

“I know, Ed,” he agreed quietly. “Your brother has a great deal of integrity. He wouldn’t do anything to hurt Miss Rockbell’s reputation.”

Ed nodded firmly. “Right.” They were both silent for a few moments, and then Ed added with a grin, “Unless cards are at stake. Al’s quite the card-shark.”

“From what I’m given to understand, it’s _you_ who has the reputation for the old ‘trick up your sleeve’ gimmick.”

Ed’s grin was smug. “Yep! I taught him everything he knows.”

Roy laughed as he watched Ed drain his mug of coffee in a long, few swallows; paying particular attention to the motion of Ed’s throat muscles as he drank.

“What?” Ed asked warily when he lowered the now empty mug and saw Mustang watching him.

The colonel shook his head. “Nothing, Fullmetal. You’re marginally more interesting than my ceiling, is all.”

Ed stuck out his tongue as he grimaced.

“Charming. I can see why everyone makes such a fuss over you.”

“Sure – brains _and_ beauty; what’s not to like?” snarked Ed with a grin.

Roy let his head drop back to rest on the couch backrest and laughed.

Ed watched him for a few moments, his eyes tracing the strong line of Mustang’s jaw. He blinked, shaking himself out of the moment, and waved the folder as he stood up.

Mustang caught the folder when Ed tossed it to him as the younger alchemist passed by on his way to get more coffee.

“So, that _is_ a promising lead,” Ed agreed. “When can I get clearance to go after it and what side-errand am I going to be mopping up for you while I’m out there?”

“No side-errand, Fullmetal,” said Roy. “Not this time. However, because it’s such a strong lead, there’s too much chance that the homunculi are either involved or will be keeping tabs on your movements. Therefore, you’re going to have to go with an escort if you intend to leave immediately. Al can either wait for us or catch up to us when he gets into town.”

Ed’s eyes widened as he sat down on the sofa again. “’Us’? What do you mean by ‘us’?”

Roy grinned a wicked, darkling grin. “I mean you and me, Fullmetal. We’re _both_ going out on this one.”

“The hell we are! This is _my_ mission! I’m not letting you take the Philosopher’s Stone away from me!” Elric snarled, hopping up onto his feet. The coffee mug he’d set on the arm of the sofa wobbled, and then crashed to the floor; shattering and spilling coffee everywhere.

Mustang’s eyes narrowed. “I have no intention of taking it _away_ from you, Elric! I promised that I would help you find it – help you _obtain_ it – and that’s what I’m going to do. This is too valuable to let you go on your own. I’m going along as extra firepower; that’s all.”

Ed glowered at the older alchemist, but his fists loosened slightly.

“I don’t get it,” he growled. “Why would you do that?”

“I gave you my _word_ , Ed,” said Roy coolly. “I know you think me a bastard, but I won’t break my word. Not to you.”

“Why?”

“Because you’ve never once broken your word to me.”

_Because I don’t want to know I let you down._

Both truthful answers, but only one of them said aloud.

Ed flopped down on the couch with a grumpy sigh. He bent over, leaning towards the floor. A clap, a flash of blue, and the cup and coffee were back to their unbroken, un-splattered state.

He didn’t drink the coffee, but set the mug on the table, and leaned back in a slump against the backrest, crossing his right ankle over his left knee.

“You’re not going to give up on this no matter what, are you?” he asked, his eyelids lowered to half-mast. It was his most deceptive, disarming look; that of a lazy, unconcerned teenager who can’t be bothered to get excited about anything.

Roy snorted. “Indifference, just like innocence, looks ridiculous on you. I know better. But, you’re correct: I’m not going to give up, so you might as well just accept it.”

“You are _such_ a bastard,” Ed grumbled.

Roy smiled. No matter the name-calling, no matter the tone… Ed hadn’t put up a fuss.

They were going to go on a field trip.

 

*~*~*~*

 

The heat was almost unbearable.

The empty land – the Nowhere Land – between Xing and Amestris was a desert zone. Desert meant arid conditions: Hot, dry, with no relief in sight.

The two alchemists had covered their tracks fairly well. Decoys had been sent out in two different directions; both of them seeming as devoid of place or populace as their true destination. That way, if anyone were to compare the travel routes, no single telling factor would lead anyone, in particular the homunculi, in the direction of the Great Desert.

Flame and Fullmetal sat hunched on their mules. Both men were wrapped in lightest-weight linen cloaks that protected their skin and hair from the burning rays of the sun. Both men were stripped down to as little clothing as they felt they could get away with, which was little more than trousers, footwear, and sleeveless undershirts.

The two of them were seriously considering losing the footwear, too.

Water was hoarded carefully, for both themselves and their animals. Food was kept as untouched as possible as well, but for a different reason.

It was too bloody hot to eat.

Edward, suffering the heat worse than Mustang because of his metal limbs, stared blankly over the mule's head, directly between its flopping ears. As the mule's ears bounced gently with each plodding step, Ed imagined that he was looking through the scope of a rifle-sight. The horizon and the fuzzy tips of the mule's ears formed crosshairs, behind which was surely his long-awaited prize.

The heat sapped his energy and made him sleepy. Once or twice, he'd nodded off. He'd almost fallen the first time, but Mustang had caught him and jerked him back upright. Startled at allowing himself to become so vulnerable near a powerful rival, and startled that Mustang had noticed and kept him from toppling, Ed had lashed out at the man in anger.

The second time, Mustang had let him fall.

The fall had been cushioned by sand, but there was still hard-packed ground beneath – else the mules wouldn't be able to walk the desert very well. The landing had jarred him awake, and Ed had lain on his back on the ground, his limbs spread out.

Until a dousing of water had splitted onto his face.

Sputtering, Ed had struggled upright and snarled at the man for being so stupid to waste water, but Mustang had merely given him a cool look (and how had he managed _that_ in the middle of a freakin' _desert?_ ) and clucked his mule into motion again.

Weary, Ed had dragged himself back up onto his own mule and followed after Roy.

Even now, Ed could feel the lethargy dragging at his eyelids and spine again. All he wanted was to fall into a deep, relaxing sleep, but he didn't dare.

If he did, the next time he fell off, Mustang would probably leave him behind.

_Nothing_ was going to stop him from getting to that hidden temple and acquiring the Philosopher's Stone.

 

*~*~*

 

Roy kept his attention as focused on Edward as he could. A lot more of it was on his surroundings and the constant, tricky manipulation of the air currents around him that kept him reasonably comfortable in the heat of the desert. The alchemic trick was a subtle low drain on his power, but worth it. He'd have been in worse shape without it; sweating far too much and losing more moisture than was good for him. For all that Fullmetal _had_ those metal limbs, he wasn't sweating quite so hard.

The real problem, Roy could see, was the danger of Ed falling off his mule and breaking his neck.

The first time he'd seen the young man start to slide off, his heart had leapt to his throat and he'd urged his mule forward just in time to catch the heavy, limp figure.

Edward's rebuke of his consideration had stung him just enough that, the next time Elric had dozed off and slipped down, Mustang had forced himself to not reach out, but instead let the smaller alchemist topple to the ground.

He'd dribbled water onto Ed's face to make the young man _move_ ; worried about the way Elric simply lay sprawled on the desert floor. When Ed had spluttered and thrashed, Mustang had hidden his relief and moved on.

Now, hanging deliberately back from Ed, he could see the weariness dragging at the younger man yet again. He didn't think Ed would remain awake long enough to make it to the temple.

According to his intel, the hidden temple of Píng Xíng was another ten kilometers ahead of them. At the rate the mules were going, it'd be another two hours before they arrived.

Ah! There. Edward had dropped forward.

Sighing, Mustang nudged his mule to move faster and came up alongside Fullmetal's mount just as the young man was beginning to list to the right.

Moving carefully, Mustang pulled both animals to a halt and tied their reins in the style that meant "stay." Then, he transferred most of the saddlebags his mule was wearing to Ed's mule, before transferring Ed himself to his leader's mule.

Roy was slightly worried that Edward only muttered and mumbled, but never actually woke up.

Bracing the younger alchemist against his chest, Roy carefully wetted a handkerchief with water, and then patted and dabbed at Ed's lips with the moist cloth.

Reaching out, he untied the reins of Ed's mule and of his own mount, and nudged the animals into motion again.

"We're almost there, Fullmetal," he said quietly. "Just hang on a little longer."

Ed grumbled something, but remained mostly asleep.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"I _slept_ on your _lap!_ "

"Yes, you did."

"You don't have to sound so _smug_ about it!"

"You would have preferred being dragged by your mule?"

"No! But—“

"But _nothing_ , Fullmetal! I let you sleep to conserve your energy and here we are, at Píng Xíng temple without further mishap," growled Roy. "So quit your bitching and get a move on, will you? I'd like to find a decent place to stop for a nap in this wreck."

Ed sneered at Mustang's back as the colonel turned and walked up the sandstone steps into the temple. He didn't say anything, however. He didn't know _why_ Mustang hadn't just shaken him awake – he really wasn't buying that energy conservation story! – but he could just _bet_ it was something perverted. 

Still... the older man _was_ exhausted. Letting Roy catch a nap would probably be a wise idea, or he'd probably not be worth squat if a fight happened suddenly.

Ed led the mules up the steps, into the temple, and through the doors. Although it was hot and stuffy inside the worn and dusty building, it was significantly cooler than outside was.

The outside of the building showed that the temple was built in a strange design that Ed wasn't familiar with. The eaves of each balcony roof formed a loose, upside-down V; the sort of concave sprawl that a paper formed if folded in half, opened, and then set down on a desk with the peak of its fold facing upwards.

Long ago, the paint had been red and green, but time and erosion had done their part to fade the colors. The temple was stacked, three layers on top of each other – biggest on bottom, smallest on top – and the roof formed another folded-paper peak with a square balcony edging it on all sides; each corner topped with a small statue of some kind.

The stone foundation was a series of steps from all sides that formed a sort of trapezoid; inviting entry from any direction.

Inside, the stone walls were pitted and scarred – pockmarked from time and other things that Ed couldn't begin to guess at. He knew there had probably been battle in the ancient building; no religious edifice was ever left undefiled for long. But, he wondered what some of the long, dragging marks were, because they looked as if they'd been formed by claws.

Thinking of claws made him think of homunculi, and he then wondered if the monsters had been there long ago.

Dust covered everything. Ed was thankful that the windows were long since shattered open, or breathing would have been unbearable. As it was, he strapped on the mules' feedbags to help filter some of the air they breathed, and then wrapped a kerchief around his own face.

He followed the pattern of footprints in the dust, leaving the mules free on the ground floor. There was nothing that would be morally or valuably ruined if they got into anything or crapped on it. So, Ed followed the footprints in the dust, and the sound of Mustang's boots clomping ahead.

The two of them ascended the stairs in silence; both looking for scrolls or books or manuscripts – something of written history that would be beneficial to them, but saw nothing. There were murals, but they were so faded as to be unintelligible. Ed thought that perhaps later he'd try to alchemize the murals; see if he couldn't bring them back to their former glory.

For now, he trailed Mustang, who seemed to have a specific destination in mind.

They climbed to the highest level and then stopped directly beneath the vented ceiling.

Ed glowered at Mustang, who was looking up at the peaked roof overhead. "Yeah, it's a ceiling. What now, Glorious Leader?"

Mustang glared right back. "I'm _working_ – which is a lot more than can be said for _you_ , Fullmetal."

"Thought you wanted to sleep?" retorted Ed quickly.

"I'll sleep when we have the Philosopher's Stone in our possession," growled Roy, and he looked up at the ceiling again.

"You think it's hidden up there?" Ed grunted, and he craned his head back on his neck to stare up at the ceiling, also.

"My intel say it’s somewhere up here."

"What does your intel say _specifically?_ "

Mustang snorted. "That it would be on the tallest part of the temple."

Ed turned and walked for one of the open balcony doors.

"Where are you going?" asked Roy, frowning.

"Up onto the roof," came the terse reply.

"Why?" the colonel asked, and then snorted and shook his head as the answer came to him immediately.

"Because the _ceiling_ isn't the _highest_ part of the temple," said Ed with a smirk. "The spiky thing on top of the roof, forming a point, is the highest part of the temple – and I specifically recall reading something about it being stuck on a spire."

Roy rolled his eyes, but decided not to say anything. It was easier just to let Ed have his minor gloat.

He watched as Ed stripped off the light cloak. Then, he positioned himself beneath the overhang of the roof, flexed his knee forward, and cupped his fingers together and held them in a "waiting" position over his knee.

"You better not be implying you think I'm too short to get up there on my own," growled Ed dangerously.

"I'm not implying anything," said Roy. "If I thought that, I'd say it to your face. However, if you really don't feel like we're actually working together until I do—“

"No! Just... shut up, already! Before you piss me off so badly I throw you off this building, Colonel Bastard!"

"Threatening a superior officer," Roy tsked. "I'll overlook it this time, Fullmetal, but the next one just might have to go on your record."

"Record away. It's not like I'm staying in this show-pony outfit anymore once I get the Philosopher's Stone," grumbled Ed, and with that, he stepped into Roy's hands and began climbing upwards.

Roy grunted with surprise as he was suddenly responsible for Ed's full weight. He scrabbled to provide support for the young man, and found himself with his face pressed snugly into Elric's crotch.

Ed hissed like a scalded cat and wiggled free. Just as quickly, he scaled Mustang like a tree and up onto the roof, and skittered just as swiftly for the spike that formed the point.

Mustang stood, staring out over the landscape. He was aware of only two things at the moment: The sensation of Ed's leather-covered crotch against his face, and the fact that Ed _definitely_ intended to leave once he had the Philosopher's Stone.

That bothered him; that bothered him a _lot_.

Ed, meanwhile, was hurrying towards the spike. There was something stuck on the end of it. Despite the coating of dust, which looked pink, something was sparkling underneath the sandy outer layer. The weird part was that the form of it was in the shape of eight spikes: Four large ones with four smaller ones in between the bigger ones.

Reaching out, he hesitated... and then, quickly, caught hold of the object. The instant he came in contact with it, he felt a rush of power and almost pissed himself at the shock of it. He was so startled, he toppled over and rolled back the way he'd come, heading right for the edge.

Mustang looked up at the thumping, thundering sound, just in time to see Fullmetal's thrashing limbs appeared, swiftly followed by the young man's body. Lifting his arms, he jumped upwards, hoping to merge his own speed of the jump with Ed's, which would slow the shorter alchemist's momentum some.

It worked. When they crashed to the floor, there wasn't enough velocity built up to couple with their mass that would otherwise have sent them crashing through the wooden beams of the balcony to the stone steps three stories below.

The two alchemists lay sprawled on the floor of the balcony, dust puffing up around them, making them cough.

Eventually, his voice and throat scratchy and his eyes watering, Roy asked, "Ed? You okay?"

Edward coughed again, and then muttered, "Yeah, 'm fine."

"Good. Get off me. For someone so small, you weigh a _ton_."

Ed's eyes widened with outrage. A moment later, he scrambled to get up – taking care to press down on Mustang as hard as he could, gouging with knees and elbows.

When he stood upright, he plunked one fist on his hip and held out the other hand, clutching the dusty object, towards Roy.

"If you're feeling so _squished_ , I guess you won't be feeling the need to get a look at this thing!" spat Ed angrily.

He turned and walked away, making sure to put an extra push on his boots so that dust scuffed up behind him; pausing only to scoop up the linen cloak he’d removed only moments ago.

Groaning, Roy curled up into a sitting position and coughed for a few moments before he achingly hauled himself up onto his feet.

"One of these days, I really _am_ going to set him on fire and _mean_ it," muttered the Flame Alchemist, and he moved to follow his teammate.

He caught up with Ed on the ground floor. "Fullmetal! You can stop the temper tantrum _any_ time now!"

Ed spun around to face his commanding officer, a full-metal scowl on his face.

" _Fuck_ and _you_ , Mustang! I've had it up to—“ Realizing that his hand, high above his head hadn't even cleared the older man's brow line, Ed dropped his hand down to his side again. "Never mind! Just... stop with the fucking short jokes, okay?!"

Roy glared right back. "Stop being so _sensitive_ about it! My God, for all that you're so—“

"DON'T!"

"—short, Fullmetal, you're the _biggest_ brat I've ever met!"

"You son of a—!“

Abruptly, the mules went wild.

Both alchemists stared as the mules began braying and bucking. They whirled in circles for a few moments, and then, orienting on the open door, they bolted outside.

"Hey!" Ed yelled. "Come _back_ here!"

"Edward – wait!" the colonel ordered, already running after his subordinate, who was chasing after the mules.

Both alchemists clattered halfway down the steps before they became aware of a high-pitched, whistling noise. Turning, they looked behind them just as day became night when an immense cloud formation blocked out the son.

"Oh..." Ed said, and his eyes were wide and his voice unexpectedly tiny as he stared at the massive sandstorm approaching with deadly speed.

Roy felt his guts chill. "Shit! Edward!" Lunging forward, he caught the seemingly petrified young alchemist up against him, and then turned and ran back into the temple.

"The mules!" shouted Ed over the roaring of the wind as it washed over them.

"On their own! We can't help them now!" Roy shouted back.

"We can't _walk_ back!" Ed howled.

"We won't walk at all if we don't get to safety!"

Inside was no better. There were no storm shutters to block out the sand that came whirling inside. There was no time for either alchemist to bring the storm shutters into existence.

Roy pushed Ed into a corner, and then bundled quickly in after; covering the young man with as much of his body as he could, while hiding his face in Ed's hair.

The two of them huddled tightly together, coughing, struggling to breathe.

Abruptly, a beam shifted loose from overhead and crashed down close by.

The alchemists startled apart and scrambled up flush against the wall, risking a quick glance up in time to see the roof beginning to unravel.

They reached for each other; their hands – and the strange piece Edward had lifted from the roof – connecting.

_Oh, please – get us **out** of here!_ thought Roy frantically.

And then, they were gone.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"Uhhhnnn! Yes! Oh, fu—Chase! Yeah, more, like _that...!_ "

Chase made a low, rough, growling noise and sucked harder on the skin of Jack's neck even as his hips moved beneath the younger man's, rocking them both firmly together.

Jack gasped, and writhed, and moaned long and low as he thrust forward, grinding his cock against Chase's, and was rewarded with the dragon-lord's sharp snarl of his name.

The albino genius was kneeling astride his older lover on the seat of Chase's throne in the warlord's reception room. Their upper bodies were bare and the rest of their clothing was askew; enough of it pulled out of the way so they could grind and stroke against each other in their eagerness.

When Jack had arrived for a visit, he'd found Chase sitting on his throne, watching something through his magical Eye Spy Orb. Jack had been struck by a moment of whimsy and he'd casually walked forward, dropped to his knees between Chase's feet, and moved the man's armor-skirting aside to nuzzle his face against the black-cloth covered groin.

_That_ had caught Chase's attention quite handily.

In a very short amount of time, Chase's cock had been bared and Jack's mouth had been wrapped around it as if he'd been dying for the taste of the dragon-man.

Chase had allowed it for only so long, but he had other plans. He hadn't seen Jack in nearly a month. Before Jack could bring him to a climax, he'd pulled the albino youth away, and then dragged Jack up onto the seat with him and kissed his young lover deeply.

Now, with most of their clothing missing, well on the way to Chase getting inside his randy young lover, they arched and rocked together as they kissed and whispered desperately filthy praises to each other. They were hot-hot; their skin warm and moist as they clung together in the throes of their lust, and each gasping sigh was as provocative as the last.

Jack pulled Chase's head back, his hands buried in the thick, ink-black hair, and he kissed into the dragon-lord's hot, wet mouth.

"Please," he begged; his voice raw and aching with need. "Please, Chase, please, you gotta get inside me, I _need_ you—!“

"Fuck!" Chase snarled, driven to the point of vulgarity with Jack's admission. He began to lift Jack, intent on preparing the goth teen—

—and froze as sensation washed across his mind. The magical wards he'd placed all over his domain had been activated.

Something with a great deal of energy had just arrived in the middle of the Land of Nowhere.

Jack groaned and writhed against his lover, not understanding the hesitation. But, when he pulled back to look at Chase, he went still, too.

"What is it?" he asked, recognizing the look on the dragon-lord's face; saw that fierce gaze had turned inward to Chase's sixth sense.

"Someone is in my realm," growled Chase, his gold eyes narrowing even as he searched mentally for the presence. "Someone with a lot of power...."

Jack sighed and dropped his head to rest his forehead against Chase's muscular shoulder.

"Whoever it is had better go away damned quick," grumbled the irritated teenager. "This is the first chance in a _month_ I've had to come see you. I want your cock inside me and I want to come screaming your name. That isn't so much to ask, is it?!"

Chase groaned and closed his eyes. "Unless you want to be taken forcibly without any preparation whatsoever, Spicer, I suggest you _shut up_."

Jack shivered. It was on the tip of his tongue to provoke the warlord into doing just that, but he knew what Chase was like in the ferocity of lust. If Chase _did fuck him without any preparation – without any lubrication at all – he'd do Jack a serious injury, and then he'd be pissed at his young lover for inciting him to do such a thing._

Instead, he tucked his face against Chase's neck and stroked the man's hair in silent apology.

Chase sighed and nuzzled roughly against Jack's hair. He wanted nothing more than to be inside that lovely, lithe albino body; wanted to watch Jack ride him, wanted to see Jack succumb to orgasm with his name on the pale lips.

But, that would have to wait.

"Whoever it is doesn't appear to be leaving," he rumbled. "Off, Spicer. I have to investigate this."

Cranky at having his sexual interlude postponed, Jack nevertheless climbed off of the older man's lap and stepped aside. He watched as Chase tucked his erection carefully back into his trousers and fastened the clothing shut as he walked over to the middle of the floor to activate the Eye Spy orb. Jack stayed by the throne and slowly stroked himself to keep his erection steady, hoping that the investigation would take very little time and they could go back to what they'd been doing immediately.

He smiled a little as he imagined Chase deactivating the Eye Spy Orb and turning back, only to find his young lover standing with his pants down, bent over the seat of the throne and looking back over his shoulder with a "I'm yours, do whatever you want" look....

Chase's low growl interrupted Jack's horny musings, and crimson eyes once again focused on the admired warlord.

"Whoever they are, they appear to possess significant power," said Chase coldly.

"They?" Jack quickly did up his own clothing, wincing at having his erection confined, but he walked over – carefully – to join his lover by the magical spying device.

He found himself looking down onto the barren wasteland that was the Land of Nowhere. Standing on the cracked, rocky ground were two figures. One was tall, with black hair, and dressed in a blue military uniform. The other was short, with blond hair in a braided ponytail and wearing a red, knee-length coat.

"Huh. Who the hell are they? And why would the military be all the way out here?" asked Jack with a frown.

"I don't know. There's something odd about that one in the blue. No military uniform I know of today wears something cut like that. He doesn't look precisely Chinese, either. A blend of China and some other culture, perhaps," Chase murmured, clearly thinking aloud.

"That glow around the two of them? What is that?" asked Jack, noting the hazy red glow surrounding the military man, and a blue one surrounding the short blond.

"Those are their auras. The strength of them tells me that they possess control over magical and/or elemental power."

Jack's eyes widened. "Nifty. Makes me want to build my own scanner/identifier."

Chase smirked at his young lover. "I have no doubt you could, but speaking as the only one possessing such power that regularly visits you, I don't see why you would need such a device."

"Call it scientific curiosity." Jack's eyes watched as the two men talked, obviously arguing if the scowls and the vigorous gestures were any indication. "Anyone with control over supernatural power glows like that?"

The dragon-lord nodded. "The young monks, naturally. Wuya. Bean." A grimace at the name. "You only glow if you've been exposed to Shen-Gong-Wu recently or are using it at the time."

Jack nodded. "Makes sense. My 'super power' is robotics, not natural magic."

"Technology isn't magic."

Jack smirked. "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic. What the rest of the world believes is only science-fiction, I've been able to build since I was four. Why do you think I'm so rich already? I'm parceling out my designs, little by little."

"Why not all at once?"

"And have governments get twitchy that I'm a possible alien bent on world domination rather than an eccentric genius?"

Both of them laughed, because they knew that Jack's fondest dream was to someday rule the world.

"Whoa!" Jack commented abruptly, watching as the argument escalated into the beginnings of a physical fight. The short blond guy – at least, he was fairly sure it was a guy – leaped back, clapped his gloved hands together, and suddenly, a metal spike grew from the back of the blond guy's right fist. The glove shredded away, revealing that the entire hand was made of metal.

Chase watched as the military man eased smoothly away and held one hand out in front of him, his white-gloved fingers curled together in the snap formation.

"Cyborg limb," commented Jack. "But I don't understand how he could grow a spike from it – unless it's part of the programming."

"No... Did you see the spark of blue that rose from his clapped hands? His aura brightened as well. It was his magic at work."

"Huh. Neural interface metal manipulation? That's some heavy-duty shit."

Chase slanted a sardonic look at his companion. "Indeed. I would prefer to meet them face-to-face _before_ they blow up my domain, however."

Jack rolled his eyes, but nevertheless turned back to his pile of discarded clothing. Quickly, he pulled on the black tank-top he'd been wearing and the lightweight black leather motorcycle jacket. He tucked the shirt into the waistband of his jeans, and he was good to go.

Chase eyed his young lover appreciatively, but quickly made short work of his own clothing and armor. When he was ready – as neatly clothed and immaculate as he usually was – he held out his arm to Jack.

The albino youth – a man, now, at the age of nineteen – fitted himself against Chase and stole a quick kiss, and gave the warlord an unrepentant grin when Chase growled.

A moment later, they vanished from the reception room.

 

*~*~*

 

Ed and Roy were sufficiently distracted from their about-to-be battle by the abrupt appearance of two beings that literally showed up out of nowhere.

In the next two seconds, Ed found himself caught hold of and neatly deposited behind Mustang, who'd lunged across the rocky ground to put himself between Ed and the newcomers.

"Hey! What the hell do you think you're doing, you idiot?" yowled Ed, and he jostled Roy to one side.

"Not now, Fullmetal!" snapped Mustang, keeping his eyes on the strange-looking men opposite them.

Ed glared at the older man, but seeing the intensity of Mustang’s gaze, he followed it to the strangers staring back at them. After a moment, he leaned over and, speaking from the side of his mouth, he asked in an obvious stage-whisper: "Whaddya think they are, Mustang? Circus performers or somethin'?"

Judging from the way the gold and red eyes narrowed quickly on their respective owners' faces, Roy had the feeling that Ed had once again put them both in the middle of the proverbial cow patty.

"There you go again, Elric," he muttered darkly. "Making friends and influencing people."

"It's a natural talent," replied the short, blond alchemist smugly.

"If that's a _natural_ talent, I'd hate to see one that's been _trained_ into you," said the white-skinned guy snidely.

The man wearing black clothing and brass armor raised an eyebrow. "I'm not so certain, Spicer. Rudeness seems to come _naturally_ to him; perhaps someone has managed to beat some manners into him at some point."

"I should be so lucky," groused the colonel, and Edward gave his commanding officer a condemning glare.

"What for? You manage to 'get lucky' everywhere you go! Why should I make it any easier on you?" he retorted, and then turned back to face the strangers. "Who the hell are you two?"

Chase and Jack glanced at each other, both of them somewhat amused and somewhat annoyed by the short, blond man's belligerence.

"I am Chase Young – the master of the Land of Nowhere, which you are currently in," said the dragon-lord with a smirk.

"I'm Jack Spicer – Evil Genius and Lord of the Robots," said Jack with a grin of his own.

Chase glanced at him and his eyebrow rose again. "That's new."

Jack shrugged. "I'm almost twenty; 'Evil _Boy_ Genius' doesn't exactly apply anymore."

"Still... Lord of the Robots?"

"It's either that or Tech-Lord."

Chase considered the options, and said, "I'm uncertain as to which one is the worse choice."

Jack grimaced. "Fine, then – _you_ come up with something!"

"Why not go with short, but simple? 'Evil Genius' says a lot."

"But it doesn't really announce my specialty."

"So? 'Evil Genius' implies you're involved with science somehow. It's practically a given."

"Science!" barked the short blond, and they both looked at him. "I recognize _that_ word! I understand _that!_ "

"What I got the gist of is that I don't believe we're where we were previously," said the tall military man.

Gold eyes gave the tall man a withering stare. "Ya _think?_ We're not inside a temple anymore, which is where we _were_ , so—“

"Excuse me."

Chase's voice was quiet, calm – and subtly dangerous. He was pleased to see the two men opposite them react accordingly by giving him their full attention.

"Would you be so kind as to tell us who you are?" he invited, and his tone made it clear that it really wasn't a suggestion.

"Ed Elric," snarled the short blond man. "The Fullmetal Alchemist."

"Colonel Roy Mustang, the Flame Alchemist," said the military man coolly.

Jack began laughing. " _Alchemists?_ Ha! I thought that hocus-pocus died out back in the 1400s with Flamel!"

Both men's attention riveted on him.

"You've heard of Nicholas Flamel?" challenged the one calling himself Ed.

Jack shrugged. "Sure. Anyone who pays attention in college can read about him. He's ancient history."

Ed and Roy glanced at each other, and then back to Chase and Jack.

"Then, you don't practice alchemy?" asked Ed slowly.

Chase and Jack shook their heads.

He held up the red, eight-rayed stone he'd alchemized free of the statue's hand. "And you don't know what this is?"

Chase's eyes widened. "That is the Sì Xing Máng."

Ed scowled. "Is that a Xingian way of saying Philosopher's Stone?"

Chase lifted one eyebrow. "No – that is the Mandarin way of saying 'Four Pointed Rays of a Star'. What you are holding is the tesseract Shen-Gong-Wu; four rays within four rays. It is what brought you here to my domain."

"Shen-Gong-Wu?" repeated Mustang, and his voice was smoothly polite.

"Uh... yeah. You know: The magical Xiaolin devices that give the user a new power depending on the purpose of the device?" suggested Jack. "How can you have used it if you don't know what it is?"

"Considering I've never heard of this 'mandarin' you speak of, I'd say we just got lucky," replied the colonel.

"Mandarin. It's the common language of China... the land you're standing on."

"I thought we were in the Land of Nowhere?" growled Ed.

"It's _part_ of China. China is the country; the Land of Nowhere is Chase's portion of it," snapped Jack. He didn't deal gracefully with confusion – his own or other people's.

"Never heard of it," retorted Elric.

"I'm not surprised," said Chase. "The Sì Xing Máng is, as I said, a tesseract. Its power is to transport the user and anything he or she is holding to wherever the user wishes to go – instantaneously. That includes between dimensions."

"Whoa, wait – you're saying they're from a parallel world?" asked Jack, pointing at the alchemists.

"I'd be willing to bet my immortality on it," replied Chase with a nod.

" _Immortality?_ " queried Ed, in a soft, intense tone. His eyes fixed with avaristic focus on Chase. "Then, you _have_ been in contact with the Philosopher's Stone?"

Chase smirked. "No – simply a demon I traded my soul to."

Jack thought about it, and decided Chase was right. No matter _what_ Hannibal Roy Bean looked like, he was still a demon.

Roy's eyes narrowed and he tensed in preparation of stepping between Ed and the strangers again if the clearly wicked man made a move towards Elric.

Ed snorted. "Demons. Yeah, right. I suppose homunculi can seem demonic to some people..." He looked hard at Chase again. "So, you haven't heard of the Philosopher's Stone?"

"I've heard of it. It doesn't exist. Flamel's research crumbled apart before he could complete it."

Jack grinned at Chase and raised his eyebrows. "I never knew you knew Nicholas Flamel."

"'Knew' is a bit strong. I kept tabs on his experiments in case I could make use of them if he succeeded."

"But he didn't?"

"If the resulting explosion was any indication on that final experiment in his lab."

Jack winced, but then grinned. "Anything like that last death scene from 'Final Destination 2'?"

Chase groaned. "It was bad enough you made me watch that film, but now you remind me of the ludicrous death scenes?"

"Oh, come on. You laughed so hard at that last one you snorted your cherry-vanilla Coke out your nose."

"HEY!"

They looked over at the outraged shout from Elric.

"I'm not going to pretend to know what you two loonies are yammering on about," Ed growled, pointing at the two strangers with his metal hand, "but _you_ say you were there for Flamel's death – that he didn't succeed – but you say you're _immortal_ —“

Chase raised an eyebrow again, and then looked at Jack. "Should I show them?"

Jack grinned. "Why not?"

A moment later, a very large, very intimidating bi-pedal dragon-creature stood where Chase Young had been a moment before.

Ed and Roy both leaped back. The eight-rayed ruby went into Ed's pocket and he once again clapped a blade into existence from his automail arm, ready to defend himself in case the monster attacked.

"Envy! I should've known you’d follow us here!" he snarled.

"I _told_ you, boy – my name is _Chase_ Young," growled the dragon-beast. His voice was layered and amplified as he spoke, creating a strange, rippling effect in his tone. "I do not know this 'Envy' you speak of."

"For real," agreed Jack. "If anything, most people usually end up envious _of_ Chase – but never the other way around."

Ed made an outraged sound, but Roy caught hold of his shoulder to get his attention.

"Fullmetal, I really don't think either one of them are homunculi," said the colonel tightly. "I don't know _what_ that thing is, but it isn't one of _them_."

"I am not a _thing_ ," said Chase hatefully. "I am the warlord of this realm; a dark sorcerer, if you will."

"And you say it isn't alchemy?" prompted Mustang.

"It is not. It is supernatural energy. I can understand how the two look similar to you."

"Then what is it?" challenged Ed with a fierce grin.

"You don't really think he's about to tell you so you can use it against him, do you?" sneered Jack contemptuously.

Two bright spots of red suffused Ed's cheeks as he went hot with embarrassment and anger.

Roy couldn't help but crack a grin. "I don't think they're like your usual opponents, Fullmetal. These two seem to be of a smarter caliber."

"Flattery will get you nowhere," retorted Chase smugly, and then he melted back into his human form. "Unless, perhaps, you would care to come back to my palace and discuss the differences between your world and mine?"

Roy hesitated. The sun overhead was broiling hot and neither he nor Ed was carrying water with them, and there was nothing nearby that either of them could transmute into a potable drinking source. There was also no guarantee that either he or Ed would be able to activate the strange device again to get them home.

On the other hand, he didn't want to become some evil man's prisoner who might be able to somehow use their alchemic abilities.

Chase grinned wickedly as he read Mustang's hesitation accurately. "You have nothing to fear from me," he said, his voice heavily amused. "My powers most likely outstrip your own, and I don't wish to attack your world. Mine is enough for me."

"How magnanimous of you," spat Elric, still not ready to give in.

"Isn't it? I find that being greedy leaves too much of an opening for ultimate failure."

The alchemists continued to hesitate, still uncertain.

"Or you can remain out here and slowly dehydrate to death," offered Chase calmly. "The first activation of the Sì Xing Máng was a fluke. Care to try your luck at activating it again for a return trip under adverse conditions?"

Roy and Ed looked at each other, silently conferring.

"Chase, come on... let's go," complained Jack. "They're obviously too 'noble' to take you up on your offer, and my skin's gonna fry bad if we remain out here too much longer."

"Hey!" growled Ed. "We're _alchemists_ \- 'noble' doesn't go under our job descriptions!"

"What my charming and ever-so-eloquent companion is trying to say is that we'll gladly take you up on your offer," said Roy with a charming smile.

Jack nodded appreciatively. "Wow. He's almost as pretty as you when he does that, Chase."

Roy's smile widened even as Chase whirled to stand very, very close to Jack.

"I beg your pardon?" he growled, his tone low and silky. "He's _what?_ "

Roy's eyes narrowed and he lifted his hand, ready to intervene if the dragon-man attacked the white-skinned youth who had stated an age roughly around Ed's.

Jack leaned forward to nuzzle affectionately against Chase's face. "I said 'almost'," he murmured quietly. "Not 'more than' or even 'equal to'." He kissed slowly, seductively, against his lover's chin and the line of his jaw. "And even if he was... he's not you, Chase. As if I'd accept anything or anyone less than perfect."

Chase snorted, but allowed himself to be mollified.

"You are very lucky with your ability to sweet talk, Spicer," he growled, but his grip on the albino youth gentled and he slid one arm around the small of his lover's back and turned to face the strangers. "Come here and take hold of my arm."

"Wait a minute!" Ed snapped. "Why are we just taking his word for it that this _isn't_ the Philosopher's Stone?"

Roy – still smarting over the implication that he was ‘less than perfect’ – opened his mouth, but hesitated. Finally, he said, "You have a point, Fullmetal."

"Prove it is," challenged Jack.

Ed gave the other teenager a wide smile full of teeth, but he pulled the eight-rayed ruby out of his pocket and pointed it at a nearby smallish boulder. "Tell you what: I'll turn that big ol' rock over there to gold. You can keep that. Call it reimbursement for the Stone."

Chase laughed, and both alchemists’ eyes widened to see that even in his human form, the man had fangs.

"If that truly _were_ the Philosopher's Stone, boy, then no amount of gold would be sufficient reimbursement for its loss," drawled the warlord. "Yet are you welcome to try your hand at it."

Ed sneered at them both, aimed the ruby towards the boulder, and thought _GOLD_ as hard as he could.

Nothing happened.

He tried again and again. He even tried clapping his hands first and holding the ruby between his palms. There was a shimmer of light, but nothing beyond that.

"Is this the part where I say 'told ya so'?" piped up Jack, and Ed whirled to face the other teenager with a menacing scowl.

Jack's grin was highly annoying in its smugness. "We'll give you a B+ for effort. You tried really, _really_ hard." His condescending tone was even _more_ annoying. "Now, try saying 'Sì Xing Máng' and thinking yourself one-hundred yards in any direction. I wouldn't recommend straight down, though, unless you want to rematerialize in solid earth."

"Oh, you think you're so smart, whitey?" growled Ed nastily.

"I _know_ I am, short-sheet."

Ed's eyes widened.

A split-second before he would have lunged at Jack in a wild fury, Roy grabbed Ed by the arm, put his hand over the ruby, and did as the white-skinned youth had instructed.

The two alchemists reappeared one-hundred yards to the left of where they had been only a millisecond before.

Ed was still swearing a blue streak when Roy thought them back to their original location by the two strangers a moment later.

Jack's eyes widened as he listened to the incredibly vulgar language pouring from the big mouth on the small dude. A few moments later, he fumbled a voice-recorder from his pocket and clicked it on while aiming it at Ed.

"Spicer..." grumbled Chase wearily.

"What? This is educational! I didn't even know that thing with the goat was possible!"

"He ought to know," sighed Roy as he watched Ed stomp around, waving his arms and yowling filthy words at the sky. "He was raised in farm country."

Then, as Jack laughed and even Chase snickered at that, Roy focused on the device in Spicer's hand. "What is that?"

"This? It's a voice-recorder," replied Jack. At Roy's confused look, he added, "Y'know... digital memory card converting the sounds it records into electronic data, that will then be played back as his voice, and mine, and yours?"

"Digital...?" queried Roy, very confused.

Jack frowned. "What's the name of your world?"

"Earth."

"Definitely parallel, then. What _year_ is it there?"

"1915."

Jack's eyes widened. "Uh... I think you're kind of behind, technology-wise."

"No... You don't say?" muttered Chase sarcastically. "Put that thing away, Spicer. It's time to go back to the mountain so we can discuss our differences in comfort."

Ed, by now, was standing with slumped shoulders. His face was damp with his exertions and he was panting for breath.

Roy caught hold of his subordinate and led him over to where the dragon-man waited for them.

"Come on, Ed," he grumbled. "It's time to play nice."

"What's the fun in that?" teased Jack, and Roy was startled enough that he laughed.

"I'm surrounded by assholes," growled Ed as he latched onto the arm-guard that covered Young's right arm.

" _Ed!_ " groaned Mustang.

They all vanished before anyone could say another word.

 

*~*~*~*

 

The first thing the alchemists were aware of when they faded back into real-world existence was the noticeable lack of heat.

A cool, blue light gave an easy glow to their eyelids, which they had squeezed shut. The other thing they noticed was the fine mist that wafted over them, pushed by a strong breeze.

They opened their eyes and _gaped_ as they realized they were on an upper level inside some sort of building with a _very_ tall, open courtyard. In fact, as they glanced over the edge of the marble platform they were standing on, they realized they could barely make out the shapes at the bottom of the courtyard.

"What is this place?" Roy asked, glancing to the man known as Chase Young.

"This is my stronghold, my keep, my palace and my home. Not many people are invited here as guests. You should feel honored," Chase stated.

Jack peered around his larger lover with a smug smirk.

"Don't pretend you aren't impressed," the albino said with a grin. “There's no place on _this_ Earth as impressive as Chase's palace."

"Yeah, yeah..." sneered Ed. "It probably took, what, a hundred years with five times that many slaves to build it? I could alchemize something better in less than ten minutes."

"Actually, I hollowed out the mountain and renovated it the way I wanted with a few handy spells that only took a few minutes," said Chase dryly.

Seeing Ed opening his mouth to try for another round of One-Upmanship, Roy stepped in front of his colleague and smiled as graciously as he knew how.

"Forgive him," he said politely. "He's entirely too used to having to argue with people constantly."

"He should learn to watch his tongue," Chase remarked coolly, "before someone removes it." 

With that, the warlord turned away; leading the way to a room where the four of them could be comfortable. 

Jack was beyond smug. He rarely got to showcase his relationship with Chase Young, so he was milking the situation for all it was worth. The albino man grinned and settled his arm around Chase’s waist. His grin grew when Chase smirked, but nevertheless wrapped his arm around Jack’s shoulders and held on firmly.

As they walked deeper into the mountain palace, Chase's warrior cats prowled out from the shadows, eyeing the newcomers intently.

Roy glanced at the jungle cats prowling closer. "You keep exotic animals as pets?" he asked coolly.

Ed also noticed the cats; noticed, particularly, how they came up to chest height on him, and swallowed roughly. "Sure hope they're house-broken."

"They aren't pets," Chase said. "These are the warriors who came to challenge me... and lost," he added with a smug grin.

"In other words, be careful or you might spend the rest of eternity on four legs," Jack said with a pretense of being helpful, looking back at the two alchemists. After a moment, he focused on the small blond, Ed. "We had a warrior here who was just a kid, maybe ten years old. He turned into a lion cub. I bet you'd look exactly like him as a cat." 

" _Who's so short he's roughly the same size as a kitten?!_ " Ed howled angrily, responding immediately to a perceived slur against his height.

"Edward!" the colonel snapped, and caught hold of the younger man. "Excuse us," he growled to his hosts, and dragged Ed away for a private conversation.

"Did you _hear_ that – that – snow white twerp?!" Ed ranted. "He called me a kid!"

"Which you are currently acting like!" Roy hissed. "Listen up, Elric: These two are our only means of survival for now until we figure out how to get home! Would you _please_ stop doing your level best to see us incarcerated in their dungeons instead of, preferably, a bedroom?!"

Ed glowered at his leader. "Just like you to be thinking of where you're going to park your lazy ass! And why a _bedroom_ , huh? You already thinking of luring that white-skinned twit away from his pimp?"

A low, low, growl reached the alchemists and it wasn't coming from the jungle cats.

"I do not tolerate slurs against my lover," Chase said, raising his voice to be heard. "Also, I have excellent hearing."

In the next instant, the warlord was in front of them, moving so fast it was almost undetectable by the human eye. 

"If I could interrupt your conversation, you can sit and join us for some light refreshment." Chase gestured to a heavily laden table. 

The richly inlaid wood surface was piled high with plates of various meats, platters of breads, deep dishes brimming with vegetables and sauces, and mouthwatering cakes and pastries.

Jack was standing nearby, stroking the mane of one of Chase's lions; one of the few cats who would tolerate the tech wizard's affections.

"Maybe if Eddie here puts something in his mouth he won't be shooting it off every five seconds," he said with a sardonic grin.

Ed began to growl in anger.

He was drowned out by his stomach growling – in hunger.

Roy glanced away and fought down a grin. Chase and Jack weren't nearly restrained, and instead smirked or snickered openly.

"Like I said earlier," Ed began, crossing his arms over his chest. "I'm surrounded by—“

"—Generous, hospitable hosts," interrupted Roy smoothly. He settled his hand on Ed's flesh shoulder and _squeezed_ , warningly.

Ed refused to flinch, but he did clamp his mouth shut.

Jack grinned and went to a seat, waiting behind the chair until Chase seated himself. For a moment, the warlord's eyes softened as he observed the sign of respect his young lover gave him.

Jack's lips quirked as he saw the warmth in Chase's eyes and his own crimson gaze warmed with a momentary glance of adoration before Spicer seated himself.

"Hopefully the food of our dimension agrees with you," the warlord said, tearing his attention away from Jack.

"If you've never heard of China, this should be a treat," Jack agreed, picking up a pair of lacquered chopsticks.

Ed settled into a seat across from Young, leaving Roy to take the seat across from Jack. He shrugged out of his red coat, and then reached for a bowl filled with steaming rice and meat.

"Looks like a combination of Xingian and Amestrian food," grunted the teenager as he began piling his plate with food.

A moment or two later, he became aware of people looking at him and silence. He looked up and found the others looking at him with varying degrees of disapproval.

"What?" he crabbed, setting the bowl of food back on its serving tray with a clatter.

"This is _Chase's_ palace, Elric," Jack said coldly. "That means Chase gets first pick."

"Then he should've moved fast—“

Ed cut off with a meep and sat back, rigidly, in his seat. His hair was still wafting gently to the right in the breeze created by Chase's hand's passage.

He didn't even have time to blink. By the time he'd done so, he realized that his plate was now sitting over in front of Young, while Young's empty plate was now in front of him.

He lifted incredulous gold eyes to meet Chase's own gold eyes, and saw the malice and smugness in them.

"Sorry," he said shortly, quietly, and to the point.

Chase's smugness level ratcheted up a notch or two. "Apology accepted," he growled softly.

"Holy shit, man, who the hell raised you?!" Jack demanded. "Didn't your mother teach you how to behave at the table? I mean, I used to rock the 'snotty brat' vibe with the best of them, but even then I knew when to give respect!"

Ed stiffened and looked anywhere but at the people across from him.

Roy reached out and gently touched Ed's right knee, and then withdrew.

Chase shook his head at Jack, indicating that he should drop the topic for now, and instead focused on Mustang. "What's wrong with him?"

Roy shook his own head. "Not my tale to tell. He'll tell you if he wants you to know."

"Lost my mom when I was a kid – a real small kid," said Ed snappishly. "Me and my little brother tried to bring her back with alchemy. Weren't supposed to. That's why the metal limbs. End of song."

Jack opened his mouth to say something, but closed it quickly. The albino youth was very close to his own mother. He was sure that if anything ever happened to her, he would be devastated. 

Instead, he looked to Chase. "May we begin?" he asked. 

The dragon-lord inclined his head regally. Jack clacked his chopsticks together and began picking choice morsels from the platters of food.

Chase watched his lover for a moment, and then turned his attention to the newcomers. "So... your commonly-used technology is equivalent to what this world's was in 1915; yet, you have cybernetic prosthetics, which are just now starting to be improved upon in _this_ world. How does that work? How do you do the neural interface? The intricacy of the robotics alone must be very daunting with such limited technology." 

"The neural what?" Roy asked.

Ed, at the same time, shrugged and replied with, "Good question, but I don't really know the answer. Our world is evolving at the rate it is. _Some_ things have to be different in order for it to be a... what? What would you call it?"

"Parallel dimension," Chase corrected, beginning his own meal.

"Weird," Jack murmured. "You'd think technology would evolve at a certain rate no matter what the dimension. I mean, one discovery should lead to another, with a few exceptions of accidental discoveries, like V5 gas or, I dunno, champagne. I'd ask if you had champagne in your world, but if there's no Europe, there's no France and if there's no France, there's no Champagne for the drink to be named after."

Jack paused to take a few bites.

"So, 1915, huh? Do you have automobiles? Telephones? Machine guns?"

"On the contrary, we have champagne," said Roy smoothly.

"He ought to know," grumbled Ed. "He feeds that swill to a new woman every night. Sometimes two."

Roy rolled his eyes. "Why are you so concerned about my women, Fullmetal?"

"I'm not! I just don't see what the point is about them."

Roy smirked as he put food on his plate. "You'll understand when you're older."

Ed gave him a mean-eyed glare. "If that was a crack about my height—“

"To answer your question, Jack – may I call you Jack? Thank you – yes, we do have telephones and automobiles. I'm not entirely certain what you mean by 'machine guns'," said Roy, ignoring Ed's fuming easily.

"Machine guns are firearms firing a rifle caliber bullet with an automated ammunition feed and firing cycle, allowing sustained automatic fire with the operator needing to do no more than squeeze the trigger and ensure there is enough ammunition. In this world, multi-barreled rapid firing guns appeared in the mid-nineteenth century, but the single barreled model as we know it was invented in 1883 and utilized the principle of using the force of recoil to power the automatic cycle in a water-cooled weapon, to eject the spent cartridge, chamber a new one, close the breech block, and fire," Jack said smoothly, pouring some tea.

The albino youth offered the first cup to Chase Young, who took it graciously. Jack flashed him a bright smile, and then poured himself a cup.

Roy nodded slowly, while Ed looked unwillingly impressed.

"We have semi-automatic hand pistols, but not automatic rifles of the type you're talking about. We have lever-action rifles and a... well; I suppose it's a machine gun. It's mounted on a two-wheeled carriage like a cannon, but it consists of multiple barrels that rotate as they spit out 6,000 rounds per minute," said Mustang.

"Over here, those are known as Gatling Guns," said Jack. "Armies all over our world nowadays have them mounted on their fighter jets to better strafe enemy war craft or land mass."

The alchemists blinked at each other, and then looked at Jack quizzically. "Fighter jets?" they said simultaneously.

Jack sighed. "Hoo-boy, where to start? Okay, I'm going to give a list of items and let me know where you get lost. Aircraft, engine powered aircraft, biplanes, jet engines."

Roy held up his hand. "As fascinated as I am to find out what my world might someday be capable of... I have to say I'm far more interested in figuring out how to get home."

"Seconded," Ed said around a mouthful of noodles.

Jack would have liked to roll his eyes dramatically and yell: 'Just use the Sì Xing Máng, morons! That's how you got here, isn't it?' But he wasn't sure what Chase's intentions with these two strangers were, so he simply looked to Chase expectantly. 

Chase smiled; a thin, barely polite expression. "All in good time. First, I would like to know more about the world you come from."

Ed and Roy both gave him a wary glance.

"Why?" Ed asked bluntly.

Chase smirked. "I'm curious, Elric. However, I have no plans for _invasion_ , if that's what is bothering you. I only want to know how much of a threat _your_ world is to _mine_."

Roy's own smile was cool. "Providing no one in certain circles becomes _aware of your world – and I have no reason to _want__ to tell anyone – you should be relatively safe."

Ed shook his head. "Forget that: they _will_ be safe. Anyone tries to cross the barriers between worlds with alchemy must go by way of the Gate of Truth. No one survives that thing; it is instant death, because that's what death is: Truth. Honesty. No one will be able to come here or go there using alchemy. The only reason _we_ made it is because of that doohickey, which I'm assuming can also send us home."

Jack's eyes narrowed. Death is Truth and Honesty? 

"I thought Truth was Beauty," he muttered under his breath.

"Jack," Chase said in a soft tone. The albino genius instantly subsided and Young turned his attention back to the blond alchemist.

"That is a dangerous thing to assume, young Elric. _If_ you mean to attempt another jump with the Sì Xing Máng, it would greatly behoove you to know exactly how to operate the Shen-Gong-Wu. You were clearly given the gods’ favor when you came to this dimension without injury. You were lucky with the field test, but in my experience, luck only gets one so far."

Ed slowly nodded his head. "True." He narrowed his eyes challengingly. "Does that mean you'll train us how to use it so we can go home? I'm assuming you don't want us around here forever."

"As I said: I would prefer to know more about your world first before I decide whether or not to trade information with you. After all, I wouldn't want a grave mistake to come back and haunt me, now would I?" Chase asked, tilting his head to one side.

"I don't know Chase, I think we might want to take the risk to get this sawed-off harpy out from underfoot," Jack said, jerking his head at Ed.

" _Sawed-off—?_ “

Ed's howl echoed in the air. A moment later, he stood up so fast his chair went skittering backwards, and he leaped up high, intending to come down on Jack and pummel the man through the floor.

Jack gasped, trying to shove his chair back.

In the next breath, Chase was in front of him. The warlord caught the blond youth by one extended leg and hurled him across the dining room. Edward was surrounded by jungle cats before he could even think of getting up.

"Do _NOT_ attack my lover!" Chase roared.

Roy stood up and Chase turned to face him.

"I agree that Elric should control his temper better," said the colonel tightly. "However, he is _my subordinate officer and therefore my responsibility. I will thank you to let me handle his discipline."_

Ed slowly got to his feet – surprisingly winded by Chase's strike. He scowled at Mustang.

"I don't _need_ disciplining!" he shouted. "What I _need_ is two minutes alone with that white-skinned weirdo and I'll show him why he shouldn't be calling anyone names!"

"You can't finish a sentence without insulting _someone!_ " Jack countered. "I don't think I need a lesson in manners from _you_ , short stack!"

The albino youth had freed himself from his chair and now stood with a wicked looking pistol drawn. At least, to the alchemists' mind, it looked sort of like a pistol. Its real ammunition was controlled bursts of artificial gravity, which could mess up a body with gut-wrenching efficiency. Jack had etched 'Mjolnir' onto the barrel.

Chase held up one hand.

Jack didn't lower his weapon, but it was easy to see his attention was suddenly riveted to Chase Young.

"Yes..." said Chase slowly, staring hard at Jack. "I believe I see your point, Colonel Mustang. It would seem that I must train my _own_ 'subordinate' on how to mind his own manners."

Roy did not acknowledge the startled and slightly hurt look on Spicer's face. Instead, he pointed hard at Ed, and then wagged his finger sternly.

Reluctantly, the blond alchemist shut his mouth and stayed silent.

Chase huffed out a breath. "Very well. Provided your soldier apologizes – without a _trace_ of sarcasm – he may rejoin the table. If I find his grace lacking, _he_ will find himself relocated to the lowest, coldest cell in my keep in order to think on the error of his ways."

Roy was silent for a moment, and then he said, " _We_ will be relocated to the dungeon."

One elegant black eyebrow arched. "Oh, yes? The officer will stand with his men? Or man, in this case.“ A cold smirk. “Very well: His grace will decide both of your sleeping quarters tonight."

Chase didn't voice it out loud, but he very much doubted any officers serving in any major army on _this Earth would make the same insistence. Such loyalty and honor seemed to have died out years ago._

Jack said nothing. He had re-holstered his weapon and stood with his jaw set and his face as close to a neutral expression as he could get. He wasn’t used to Chase castigating him openly in front of other people anymore. Nowadays, Chase tended to speak civilly to him in front of others. That the dragon-lord rebuked him now meant that he had, indeed, transgressed beyond Chase’s approval.

Ed, in the meantime, was utterly furious. He ground his teeth together and glared balefully at Mustang. That _bastard!_ That unmitigated bastard! How _dare_ he pull such an underhanded stunt!

"Well, Elric...?" prompted the dark sorcerer.

Ed narrowed his eyes briefly, and then closed them. After a moment, he opened them and said, blandly, "I am sorry for behaving badly at your dinner table. I'm sorry for attempting to attack your lover."

"Like you mean it," Chase admonished with an evil grin.

Ed looked the man in the eyes. "I won't lie. You asked for polite. I gave you polite. But I won't lie."

Silently, secretly, Roy was impressed – even though it meant he was probably going to have a long, cold night on a stone floor, if not in chains.

Chase tilted his head to one side and considered the small youth for a long moment. "Hmm. So I did. Very well. Spicer? Your turn." 

The albino man glanced at the warlord. " _I_ didn't try to attack anyone at the dinner table!"

"No, but you were rude and antagonistic. I doubt Elric would have reacted quite so badly had you not needled him verbally. Apologize for that," Chase commanded.

Jack's jaw dropped open; incredulous.

"Without a hint of sarcasm, as was stressed, or, my dear Spicer, _you_ will spend a night in chains."

Jack gawked at his lover, and then his mind leapt to what had transpired on the nights he had spent in chains in Chase's keep. The alchemists were probably puzzled by the sudden smirk that twisted the pale youth's lips.

"Well. I'm sorry I called you short, Ed," Jack offered in the same flat tone Elric had used.

"Thank you," said the blond youth coldly, but still politely.

Roy and Chase exchanged glances. It was obvious that these two would never become willing allies. If anything was going to get accomplished between the four of them, either Young or Mustang would have to run interference.

No one mentioned that, however, as they all sat back down at the table; chairs once again neatly in place and food slowly consumed as Chase and Jack, somewhat patiently, picked information from the two alchemists.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Much, much later, Ed lay loosely spread-eagled on a single bed with a surprisingly comfortable mattress and stared blankly upwards at the curved rock ceiling overhead.

"Man..." he whined. " _Hours_ of talking about daily life in Amestris!"

"Not just Amestris," Roy muttered from the other bed, where he was in a similar position as Edward. "Our whole _world_. All we can do is hope he won't go back on his word about invading."

The shorter alchemist snorted. "You _did_ get the whole 'evil' vibe, right? You didn't miss the fact that he's a dangerous villain?"

"I understood it better than _you_ , apparently," retorted the colonel. " _I_ wasn't the one baiting the man at his own dinner table, nor was I the one trying to kill his lover right in front of him!"

"You would have if he'd called _you_ short!"

"Hardly! For one thing: I'm _not_ short! For another: _I_ have better control over myself than that. And, finally: I don't have issues about a simple fact of life I have no control over!"

That, of course, was a fib – not that Edward knew, and Roy certainly wouldn't tell him if he had any say in the matter. But, he had to do _something_ to help Ed find a way to calm down about being—

"You _bastard!_ " Ed yelled, and abruptly, his pillow was smacking down onto Roy's face.

Roy let out a yell of his own and surged up from the bed.

Long, long minutes later, the two of them lay panting amid a debris field of down and fabric; their pillows more wounded than they were.

"You _have_ to get over it, Fullmetal," Mustang groaned, forcing himself to roll over in preparation for standing up.

"Never," grunted Ed stubbornly.

"Why couldn't I have been lucky enough to be a farmer somewhere?" Roy whined.

“ _Hah_. Like you’d get up before dawn to go feed the pigs and shovel out horse stalls.”

“Or milk the cows,” Mustang shot back a trifle meanly, using Ed’s aversion to milk against him.

Instantly, the smaller alchemist curled up like a pill-bug and rolled a little bit away.

“Ewwwwwwwwwww!” groaned Ed. “Colonel Bastard, if you make me throw up all that delicious food, I _swear_ I will make you regret it!”

“ _How_ , exactly?” the older alchemist growled.

“Probably tie you up somewhere so I can torture you,” Ed growled back.

Roy swallowed hard as he fought away an instinctive reaction of _liking_ that idea.

“Shut up, Ed,” he muttered.

Ed smirked.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Chase and Jack curled together on the sofa in Chase’s favorite parlor. A roaring fire in an ornate fireplace kept them warm as they relaxed on the comfortable furniture.

“So, what do you think?” asked Jack, tracing a mathematical equation over Chase’s right thigh.

“I think we are relatively safe from them,” said Chase immediately. “Although they are dangerous, it is clear that they wish only to get home.”

“With the… what was it they were whining about?”

“The Philosopher’s Stone. Many have sought it. I had no idea it was wanted by people living in parallel worlds, too.”

“Mmmm.” Jack hummed as Chase’s fingers burrowed into his hair to lightly rub at his scalp, causing a tingling sensation. “Isn’t that the chunk of rock that can change other things into gold?”

“Transmute them, yes. Into other elements as well,” agreed the dragon-lord.

“So, does it exist?”

There was a moment of silence, followed by a quiet, “Perhaps.”

Jack’s mouth stretched in a wicked grin. “You sly dragon. I bet it’s a Shen-Gong-Wu.”

Chase glanced down at his lover, intrigued, but asked only, “Why do you think that?”

“Because advanced science and magic are often indistinguishable from one another.”

The Heylin lord laughed quietly and hugged Jack closer against him.

“I think,” said Chase as he half-closed his eyes and rested his cheek against Jack’s hair, “that it might be wise to give the alchemists the technological information they were asking about.”

“Yeah?”

“Mmmm. If you do maintenance Elric’s metal limbs while he’s here, then you will have to use current technology, correct?”

“Yep.”

“Someone will notice eventually. Someone will find a way to trace it. Therefore, it would be better to give the scientists of their world such a glut of information that they will be preoccupied for many, many years.”

“What if they decide to track it back to the source?”

Chase smiled. “We will deal with them. Hopefully, however, I’ll have managed to get a few defenses in place.”

Jack grinned. “If anyone can, it’s you.”

They were silent for a few moments.

Then, Spicer turned so he could drape his right leg over Chase’s lap even as he began kissing his lover’s neck.

“Jack…” said Chase with a small frown. “No.”

Startled, the young albino man pushed his way upright and slid over further so he could straddle Chase’s lap.

“What? What do you mean ‘no’?” he asked, confused. “Don’t you want to—?“

“I do, yes. Yes.” Long, strong fingers lifted; stroked down Jack’s arms. “Always. You are very beautiful, qíng rén; you arouse me quite strongly.”

“Then, why…?”

Chase shook his head. “Not while there are two very dangerous strangers in my home. I cannot afford to be so carelessly distracted.”

Jack stared incredulously into his lover’s vibrant gold eyes. “You’re… you’re joking, right? I mean: They’re locked in their room, there are warriors guarding them, we’re _alone_ …”

“Jack, no.” Chase shook his head slowly, his scowl deepening. “You know I do not like denying you, but I cannot… You do not understand, Spicer.”

“Then, explain it to me,” the younger man said quietly, leaning in to kiss and nibble Chase’s neck temptingly.

The dragon-lord shivered, but kept his hands fisted in the blanket rather than reach for his young lover; kept his eyes trained on the artwork of scenes from Ancient China painted on the ceiling overhead.

“I am, I suppose you would say, paranoid,” he said slowly. “Despite the truth of what you have said regarding our guests’ range of mobility, I cannot make myself turn off my instincts, Jack. I know what I know: There are two dangerous men in this palace that can do a great deal of damage to my home, my warriors, my lover, and me should they take it into their minds to do so. I cannot ignore that.”

“Not even for twenty minutes?” Jack purred. “A quickie; a quick little quickie, I promise. Just let me get on my knees—“

Chase shook his head sharply. “No! Spicer – Jack – do not force me to walk away from you. I will if you push me, Jack.”

The younger man sat back on the warrior lord’s knees and contemplated the somber gold eyes glaring up at him.

After several moments, Jack sighed and snuggled down against Young’s chest.

“Fine, you big grouch,” he said, only a little petulantly. “You’re more important than an orgasm – no matter how bad I want it.”

A wry smile creased Chase’s face. “Thank you, qíng rén.”

Jack hummed as the blanket was brought up to cover them both and he wriggled happily at being so warm.

“Love you,” he said softly.

Chase made a gentle sound and stroked his lover’s back, easing Jack toward sleep.

 

*~*~*~*

 

When the alchemists arrived in the dining room the next morning, following a jungle cat escort, they were surprised to see Jack on the far side of the room. He was holding something up against the side of his head and he was talking to it in low tones.

Roy and Ed exchanged glances, each thinking the same thing: Either Spicer was whacko or this was yet another piece of technology that their world hadn’t yet developed.

Chase gestured them to take a seat. He was already tucking into a hearty breakfast of thick slices of honey-cured ham, pan-fried bread, several fried eggs, and a bowl of something they couldn’t identify.

“Yeah, love you, too, Mom,” said Jack as he walked within hearing range. “Have fun at the auto show. Yeah. Uh-huh. Alright. Bye, Mom.”

With that, Jack pulled the device away from his head. He tapped it with his thumb, and then folded it in half and slipped it into his pocket before sitting down.

“What is that?” Ed asked immediately.

“Is all well with your parents, Jack?” Chase asked politely.

“They’re fine. They’re going to attend an auto-show in Detroit; the latest Mustangs are coming out and Dad wants one. Personally, if they aren’t from the 1960s, I don’t want to know about ‘em,” said Jack.

“Excuse me?” yelped Roy.

Jack smirked at the older alchemist. “Not you. Here, we have several different makes and models of automobiles. One of them is what we call a ‘muscle car’, which is code for ‘a high-performance automobile with a really powerful engine’, and it was named Mustang. It can go as fast as 187 miles-per-hour.”

A slow, wicked grin spread across Roy’s face. “So… fast, strong, and powerful, with reliable performance?” He winked. “I like that.”

Chase straightened imperceptibly and narrowed his eyes.

Jack snorted lightly and began to reach for the food.

“Hey!” snapped Ed. “I asked: What was that you were speaking into?”

“It’s called a cell phone, which is short for cellular telephone. It’s a long-range, portable electronic device used for communication,” answered Jack patiently. “In short, it works like a regular telephone, only you can be anywhere on the planet – sitting, standing, walking, driving, flying, boating, skiing, whatever – and you can still talk to whomever you place a call to.”

Ed’s eyes widened. “Damn, that’s handy. I’d never have to hunt around for a phone booth to call in to HQ ever again.”

“Which means I’d be able to contact you anytime I wanted to,” said Roy, and he smirked wickedly at the younger alchemist. “Anytime – and you wouldn’t be able to get away from it!”

Ed bared his teeth in a snarl. “Unless I crammed it up your—“

Roy stuffed a piece of bread into Ed’s mouth and smirked again.

Jack folded his arms atop the table and buried his head down into them as he laughed uproariously.

Chase smiled, though it wasn’t a _pleasant_ expression – not with eyes gazing so coldly at the two foreigners.

“So… what is this over here?” Roy asked, gesturing to a large bowl containing something golden yellow and grainy, and smaller bowls surrounding it filled with various meats and vegetables.

“Jack enjoys what he calls ‘maize mush’,” said Chase. “Whenever he is in residence, I have the necessary supplies on hand to allow him one of his favorite meals.”

Finally calming down from his giggles, Jack lifted his head and wiped at his streaming eyes.

“The black mark on your face…” said Ed with a frown. “It didn’t wipe off.”

“It wouldn’t,” said Jack with a smirk. “It’s a tattoo.”

“When he was younger – when he was much, much wimpier about pain – he would draw it on with make-up,” said Chase, and offered a teasing smile to his lover. “These days, he is much tougher, and had his preferred mark tattooed on.”

Jack grinned at the dragon-lord, and then reached for the ‘maize mush’ bowls.

Ed watched carefully as a layer of the golden grain was laid into the bottom of Jack’s bowl, and was then piled with strips of sizzling meat and tangy vegetables, followed by another layer of maize mush, and then drizzled with a thin-thin stream of oil. Then, Jack stirred it all together, making a jumbled mess.

“May I…?” he asked, remembering, at the last moment, to use manners.

“Go ahead,” Jack invited graciously. “I asked the warriors to make extra in case you or Mustang wanted to try some.”

Ed didn’t need any further invitation. He quickly assembled his own bowlful and began eating, noisily and a little bit messily.

Mustang sighed and helped himself to eggs, sausage, toast, and fruit. He glanced at the carafes and asked, “What do you have?”

“Tea and coffee,” replied Jack. “Chase, being Chinese, prefers tea. I’m a coffee drinker, personally.”

“What is ‘coffee’?”

Jack gaped at the older man for several seconds.

Chase smirked. “Recall, Jack, that coffee wasn’t introduced until the 9th century, roughly around 800 AD, and originated in Ethiopia.”

“Oh, right.” The albino man pulled out his cell phone, opened it, and then pushed on the keypad a few times before handing the device to Roy. “Do you have people that look like this?”

To Roy’s amazement, he was staring at a colorful image of a man with skin so dark a brown it was almost black. The man was wrapped in colorful clothing of green, yellow, and red, and had a bright smile on his face.

Ed got up to go see what Mustang was looking at and blinked in surprise as he peered down over the man’s shoulder.

“No,” said Roy. “We have people called Ishbalans, but they’re not this dark.”

Jack held out his hand and Roy put the cell phone gingerly into the black leather-covered palm. Jack tapped on the keypad again and then held the phone out to Roy once more.

Mustang took it and saw himself looking at a tan-skinned man dressed in sand-colored robes and a lighter-colored head-scarf.

“Yes, we have people like this,” he said, and handed the phone back, ignoring Ed’s hand reaching for the device.

Ed growled at Mustang and went back to his chair to eat some more.

Jack nodded. “Then you have what we call ‘middle easterners’. It’s a vague description for a vast group of different ethnicities.”

“If you say so,” said Roy with a small smile.

Chase waited until they were all mostly finished with breakfast before bringing up the subject of the alchemists’ home world again.

“I admit to being intrigued,” said the warlord, while holding a cup of steaming-hot tea in one hand. “Your mode of dress, communication, and transportation are several decades behind ours, yet you have people capable of creating fully functional metal limbs that merge with human flesh, and is technology not yet realized here.”

Jack snorted. “True in _most_ instances. All those mainstream, mundane ‘scientists’ out there just talk, talk, talk about it.”

“You’re saying _you_ can create automail?” sneered Ed.

“Not only can I create it, it will be better than the junk you’re wearing now,” retorted Jack.

Before Elric could make a reply, Chase slammed his hand down on the table firmly.

“Pissing contest _later_ ,” he growled.

“Sorry, Chase,” said Jack immediately.

“Yeah, whatever,” scowled Ed.

“So, we don’t have coffee,” said Roy, to break the tension. “What does it do?”

“It keeps a person awake. It is full of a substance called ‘caffeine’ that impacts the body’s adrenal system, resulting in a stage of hyper-alertness,” said the Chase matter-of-factly. Personally, I find it too bitter to take.”

“Dude, that’s what the cream and sugar is for,” Jack said with a grin.

“I was okay with it right up until you said ‘cream’,” muttered Ed with a grimace.

Chase lifted an eyebrow. “You don’t like milk?”

“Too bad. You could really—“ Jack broke off immediately at the look Chase gave him.

“Oh, ha-ha,” groused Ed. “Like I’ve never heard _that_ one before.”

“Ed, play _nice_ ,” said Roy through a tight smile.

“This _is_ me playing nice.”

“Scary,” commented the other three men at the table.

Ed sneered and continued with his breakfast.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"Oy... Mustang!"

The colonel turned from the portrait on the wall in the museum gallery that was Chase Young's home. He lifted an eyebrow when he saw Jack Spicer walking towards him.

Jack smirked at him. "It's kind of creepy when you do that. He does it a lot, too. And since you both have Oriental features...."

Roy blinked. "I don't know what 'Oriental' means."

"Of, pertaining to, or characteristic of the Orient, or East; Eastern."

Roy let a slow smile curl one corner of his mouth. "We have an 'Eastern' in our land. It's called Xing. It's out beyond our East City; hidden behind the Great Desert that is tucked behind Ishbal."

Jack snorted. "Useful information if I ever decide to give up technology and Chase to invade the World That Time Forgot. Speaking of which: Here's an example of the upgraded weaponry I was talking about."

The colonel accepted the rolled piece of paper Spicer handed him with alacrity. He didn't much care for weaponry; he had no wish to _hurt_ people. But he recognized that sometimes, might made right, and weapons were mightier than words when faced with the unreasonable.

He unrolled the long, slender scroll and looked at the schematic before him. His eyes widened as he realized he was looking at a weapon far in advance of Amestris' current technology.

"A... lah-ser?" he asked, trying to sound out the unfamiliar word.

"Lay-ZER," corrected Jack. "It’s an acronym: Light Amplification by Stimulated Emission of Radiation. I'll send over the blueprints on how to scientifically create a laser beam. Once your geeks become familiar with the process, the laser guns can be built without fatal catastrophic failure." He reached out and tapped on the middle of the blueprint; the paper bouncing and crinkling in Roy's grasp. "A laser can burn a hole through a human in no time at all. Thicker substances, like a mountain, will take time, but the laser can't be stopped unless you turn it off. It will cut through whatever's in its path."

"This is... frightening," said Mustang frankly. He gave Jack a steady, obsidian glance. "Are you certain you want to unleash this kind of firepower on a world with lesser technology?"

Jack's grin was wide and held a hint of cruelty in it. "Technically, I'm not supposed to, but I've always thought of it more as a Prime Suggestion."

Something in his tone and the gleam in his eye told Roy that a joke had just been said, but it was one only Spicer understood.

"I'll keep this, if you don't mind," said the colonel. He rolled the paper again and slipped it into his pocket until only a third of it was left sticking out past the fabric. "In the meantime... join me? Perhaps you can explain some of the treasures in this gallery."

Jack glanced past the older man and grinned at the painting Mustang had been looking at. He cleared his throat and began speaking in a "scholarly" tone.

"The twelve-armed and three-headed Heruka Chakrasamvara, the central deity of the mandala, held and… ah… ‘loved’, if you get my drift, by his female consort, the red Vajravarahi. He’s standing in the midst of wisdom flames and trampling on two corpses. The things he’s holding in his hands symbolize his magical perfections. The scepter and bell in his main two arms, vajra and gantha, demonstrate that he’s overcome duality. His thing is that he transforms hate energy into enlightening wisdom."

Roy's eyes widened. He looked at the image again and realized that, yes: The red-against-blue that he'd been looking at was indeed a person – a female person who had her legs wrapped around the hips of her blue-skinned lover.

He cleared his throat and tugged slightly at his collar; suddenly very, very warm within the cool marble-and-rock halls of the mountain palace.

He walked a little further down the hall and came to another piece of art. It was a hanging scroll; a drawing made of ink and color on a thin paper of a type he didn't recognize. It was a landscape drawing and it took his breath away.

"What's this?" he asked quietly.

"That's known as 'Clear Day Over the Wu Gorge of the Yangtze River'," said Jack casually. "Not very old by Chase's standards, although to me, 1931 is practically ancient history. It's ink and color on rice paper. Drawn by... hmmm... I think it's Wu Li-fei...? No! Lu Yi-fei. That's it."

"It's lovely," Roy said honestly, entranced with the colors and the lines. He glanced over at Jack and let one of his more charming smiles spread across his face. "Although, not as lovely as you."

Jack's eyes widened and he looked at the colonel incredulously.

It was only the involuntary, natural flick of Jack's eyes to the right that saved Roy.

Instantly, the alchemist dropped down low. He pushed Jack away even as he did so, and thus the large mass that had been hurtling towards the pair of them went over and past them harmlessly.

Roy stood swiftly and turned to meet his attacker, and his eyes widened at the sight of Chase Young in his animal form. The recessed golden eyes burned with an inner fire that challenged the Flame Alchemist; taunted him with a gruesome death.

_A most reasonable assumption,_ thought Roy, _considering the look on the creature's face._

It was true; the snarl on Chase Young's face was hideous. His dragon lips had curled back to bare his frighteningly large, long, sharp teeth. Utter loathing made his eyes glow and his tail was lashing dangerously close to the priceless _objets d'art that lined the walls to either side of him._

Roy sighed...

...and ran.

He could hear the scrape-drag of claws digging into the marble flooring behind him. He could hear Jack's startled, indignant query. None of it mattered; the only thing that was necessary was getting to a defensible ground.

Roy ran hard and fast; his long legs stretching out and powering him along the floors and down staircases until he came to a wide open platform that looked more like a dueling arena. He turned sideways, skidding into a slide, and then shifted his weight again so that he slid backwards across the marble floor until he came to a halt in a defensive stance just as Chase Young leaped from a high point and landed with a heavy, bone-jarring THUD! on the platform.

Chase prowled closer, on all fours; his tail lashing the air behind him. Jack came running down the stairs above and behind the platform, his face anxious. Below them, a muffled shout, and Roy spared a quick glance to see Ed charging up another staircase; his expression furious.

_It would be nice if he was angry because I'm in danger and not just because he's **always** cranky,_ growled Roy silently in his mind.

And then, he put Ed out of his thoughts and concentrated on the half-mad dragon stalking him.

"Is there any particular reason I should make your death quick?" rumbled Chase, and Roy felt his blood turn to ice in his veins.

"You plan to murder me for harmless flirting?" Mustang asked coolly, allowing none of his trepidation to show. He would _not_ give that satisfaction to an enemy – ever.

"Spicer is _mine_ ," snarled the dragon-lord, and his tail lashed against the floor so strongly that chips of marble sprayed up and away from the strike; the crack of scale-on-stone ringing in the air.

"Yes, he is," agreed Roy. "Just because I flirted with him doesn't mean I planned to take him from you. He's a pretty young thing and I flirt with pretty young things. It's what I _do_."

A rough snort, followed by Ed saying scathingly, "No shit. Colonel Heartbreaker there spends more time chatting up bimbos than he does on his paperwork. No wonder Hawkeye can't keep her hand off her pistol: She either wants to shoot him for dereliction of duty or shoot him for womanizing with everyone except _her_."

Roy scowled. Never taking his eyes from Chase, he said, "Thank you for that completely unnecessary editorial, Fullmetal. What Lieutenant Hawkeye expects from me is _none_ of your business."

"Enough!" snapped Chase, and he reared up until he was standing upright. "I do not care about your petty lovers' quarrel!" He ignored Ed's outraged squawk. "Mustang and I are going to _finish_ this – if he doesn't run away like a _coward_ again!"

"What coward?" asked Roy with a cold smile. "I just didn't want to destroy priceless works of art – or Jack's lovely white skin."

"Aw, shit," muttered Jack, who was standing beside Ed. He sighed and covered his eyes with his hands; not wanting to see Roy's entrails go flying.

A horrid, nerve-shattering roar ripped forth from Chase's throat.

And then, he leaped forward as hard and fast as he could; claws extended for battle.

Roy felt himself slip into that zone – that perfect moment when he called upon his alchemy and felt it respond precisely to his desires. Flexing his right hand against the glove it wore, pressing his skin up against the red-thread transmutation circle, he adjusted the density of the air molecules until the hydrogen and oxygen split apart. He _called_ the hydrogen inwards and _snapped_ at the focal point where they gathered.

He had gathered quite a bit of hydrogen.

The resulting fire blast erupted directly into Chase Young's face and upper torso, and sent the dragon-lord careening backwards to slam hard into a rock wall several feet away – hard enough to crack the rock, leaving a dragon-shaped dent in the stone.

"CHASE!" Jack yowled, and he would have run to his lover if Ed hadn't caught hold of him with his automail hand and hung on tight.

"Are you _nuts?_ " snapped the blond youth. "Don't get in the way!"

Jack rounded on Ed. "Shut the hell up! Your sugar daddy just—“

"One: he _ain't_ my sugar daddy," growled Ed in quiet rage. "Two: even if he _was_ , he just beat up _your_ sugar daddy. And right now, _both_ of 'em are pissed. If we get in the way, they might be too pissed to give a damn!"

Jack didn't want to admit it, but Ed was right. While Mustang _might_ remain coherent enough to notice any stray bystanders that could get injured – he seemed like the type of guy to be concerned by that kind of stupid thing – Chase wouldn't care; not even if Jack was in the direct line of fire. That was just part of what made him evil.

Fuming, he ignored Ed's smirk and turned to watch as Roy completed the long, slow walk over to where Chase was slowly picking himself up off the floor.

"I have no intention of taking Spicer away from you," said the Flame Alchemist, his hand held out before him with fingers curled to snap. "I had no idea that some mild flirting—“

"'Mild'? Hah! Try 'gracelessly heavy-handed'!" called Jack rudely.

"—would result in you becoming so murderously angry," continued Roy, ignoring Jack's interruption. "Had I known you were so insecure about your bond with him, I wouldn't have attempted it."

"I am _not_ insecure," said Chase, and he stretched up to his full, draconic height and glared imperiously down at Mustang. "I simply take a dim view to anyone being too familiar with _my_ lover!"

Roy offered a chill smirk. "Duly noted. Now, since this _is_ your home and you have been a gracious host in as far as your evil nature allows, I hereby apologize for my behavior towards young Mister Spicer. I won't do it again."

So saying, he symbolically uncurled his fingers and let his hand drop to his side. He offered a small bow from the waist, as well.

Neither of the two combatants moved for a few moments.

Finally, Chase morphed down into his human form.

Roy shivered. For some reason, Young seemed far more terrifying in _this_ form than he did in his dragon body.

Then again, one expected to see evil on such a monstrous lizard-face. To see that same evil gazing out from a human facade was intimidating.

"Very well," said Chase, his tone flat and vicious. " _You_ will cease making any kind of advances – harmless or otherwise – towards my lover. _I_ will not rip your head off and slow roast it for my dinner."

Everyone was silent for a heartbeat or two.

Then, Ed chose to defuse the situation by calling out, "Kind of a poor choice, there; very little meat, way too much fat, and way too _thick_ to chew through easily. You'd have better luck with that lazy, fat ass of his."

Roy went rigid at the insult. Normally, he could take whatever Ed dished out and send it back at the arrogant little bastard. But this... mocking him in front of an enemy...?

He bowed politely to Chase; just enough that he wasn't leaving himself dangerously vulnerable, but nothing less that would be an insult to his host.

Then, he spun around – his butt-skirt flaring with the movement – and strode away; his speed and motion telegraphing his anger clearly.

Ed blinked, and then stared incredulously when Mustang stormed past him without even once glancing at him.

"Way to support your teammate in a hostile environment," Jack snarked acidly, and then he went over to where Chase stood waiting.

Ed's eyes widened a little bit more as he realized what he'd done. Groaning, he facepalmed; wincing slightly at the muffled thwack against his skin from the covered metal of his right hand.

Then, sighing, he took off after Mustang. He hated to lower himself like this, especially to that flirty _bastard_ , but Spicer was right: they were stranded in a world unfamiliar to them. If they were going to survive, they had to at least be on speaking terms with each other.

Chase and Jack watched Ed go running off after Roy. Then, they turned to look at each other.

They didn't say anything; simply held gazes for a few moments.

Slowly, Jack began to grin.

"What?" asked Chase, lifting an eyebrow. His tone was still somewhat disgruntled.

"Nothin'. Just... I like that. You were _angry_ that someone might take me away from you." Jack's grin widened. "You _fought_ to keep me."

The look in his eyes became slow and sensual, and he moved a little bit closer.

"I really, _really_ like that," he murmured, and his voice reflected the intensity of his admiration.

Chase went tense. He didn't move from his position with his arms tucked behind his back, but his nostrils flared a bit wider; taking in Jack's hotter, baser scent.

When Jack touched him – his strong, white hands curling down against his narrow waist – Chase’s resolve snapped.

Quickly, his arms lashed around Jack and he hauled the startled albino man up against him. Spicer made a strangled noise of surprise, and then was too busy trying to kiss back to even think about speaking.

Chase kissed deeply into Jack's mouth. He was frantic for the taste of his young lover; more so than usual. Perhaps he _was_ a bit insecure, but only in that Jack was not _bound_ to him; not yet immortal like him, and could so easily be taken away before he could take the steps necessary to keep Jack in his life always.

Now, listening to Jack's deep moans of approval, feeling his lover's arms go tight around his neck and the lithe body press up against him, Chase felt the need to impress upon Jack that he would not let anyone take Spicer away from him.

Turning swiftly, he pressed Jack against the rock wall and held him in place when the albino youth arched, growling petulantly about the cold against his back.

"Chase," said Spicer breathlessly when the dragon-lord finally let him speak again. "What are you—?“

He arched again and shivered as Chase bit at his neck; grazing scratches across the purely white skin with his fangs and then latching his mouth onto those thinly bleeding cuts. He sucked strongly, gathering the fluid, the flavor, and swallowed; his tongue rubbing against the scratch-sensitive flesh, and he reveled in the grating, needy cry that vibrated against the strong throat.

" _Chase_ ," Jack groaned, and clutched at his lover restlessly. "Thought... thought you said we couldn't until they left...?"

Chase drew back and caught hold of Spicer's right wrist. He pressed the back of the albino man's right hand and arm up against the wall, while his left hand reached down and tugged the red shirt Jack wore free of the waist band of his trousers. Slipping his hand up beneath the shirt, he stroked upwards until he found a nipple and began to pinch it and pull it gently; so gently, knowing how delicately, wonderfully responsive Jack's nipples were.

Jack arched yet again, yowling on a sobbing note as electric fire raced along his nerve endings. With every barely-there press of Chase's fingers, every tiny twist and careful tug, a corresponding jolt of pleasure would streak down his body to his erection – zip-zap chrome flash of bliss that made him curl inward reflexively and then uncurl with a rocking, thrusting buck of his hips that he couldn't control.

"Chase, _please_ ," he begged, and he tried to strain forward. He stretched outwards with his tongue, wanting to lick that spot below Chase's right ear where it met the man's neck; one of the few sensitive spots on the dragon-lord's body. He knew from experience that if he toyed with that spot long enough, Chase would be unable to stop. "Chase, please, I need to come!"

The warlord rolled a husky, mocking laugh from his throat. "You always need to come, Jack. Such a randy young man; always thinking about sex and orgasms and _me_."

"Only with you," crooned Jack, and it was a guileless admission; a simple statement without artifice that he only wanted to have sex with Chase Young.

Chase let go of Jack for a few moments. He crunched his fingers down through the rock wall behind his lover – needing to vent his sudden surge of emotion violently, but without damaging Spicer.

Jack laughed, low and triumphant, and leaned up quickly; intent on that spot below Chase's ear.

Chase reared back fast and small chunks and slivers of rock pulled away at the withdrawal of his fingers. His heart was pounding in his ears and he could feel the dangerous ripple of scale just below his flesh – a sure sign that he was close to losing control and would lose it completely if Jack got his mouth on him.

The warlord groaned abruptly at the thought-memory of Jack on his knees, between his legs, looking up at him with lustful, adoring eyes even as his cheeks hollowed—

Snarling, Chase pulled Jack roughly up against him. He lifted, urging the younger man to climb him like a tree, and once Jack was situated, Chase leaned forward so that he pinned his young lover to the wall once again.

"Oh, gods, yeah, fuck, yeah, _hurry!_ " Jack moaned, and his legs went tight around the beautiful man's hips; his hands burying in the thick, silken tangle of the greenish-black hair.

Chase made a low, guttural sound and took Jack's mouth in another kiss. His hips began moving, thrusting, taking the motion of lovemaking and applying it here, up against the wall and fully clothed. He wouldn't lower his guard to become naked while there were strangers in his home. He simply couldn't bring himself to be so unwary. But he would take the edge off of Jack's lust while he could, even if it meant fanning his own flames dangerously hot, because he'd be _damned if Jack would be wandering around the mountain, hot and needing to be fucked, with that fire-dancer so damnably close by._

His hips worked hard between Jack's thighs as he stroked himself hard and fast and rough over the hardened ridge that strained the material of the black trousers. Jack was screaming into his mouth; sharp, staccato noises of desperation. He was frantically trying to ride and couldn't manage it because he didn't have the leverage. But he didn't stop trying, so needy to be _with_ Chase, and that pleased the dragon-lord immensely; that Jack needed _him_ and no one else so passionately.

He thrust harder and faster against Jack, and kissed hungrily, and murmured words of dark love and ownership against Jack's damp throat, and then Jack was bucking rigidly against him – eyes wide, mouth open on a staggering, cracking howl of relief.

Chase held still and shifted backwards a bit, supported Jack, and _now_ there was leverage; _now_ Spicer could _ride_ and he _did_ , caught in the throes of a viciously powerful climax.

So aroused that his _fangs_ ached, Chase consciously chose not to take his own pleasure. Instead, he watched his beautiful lover enjoy the sensations and felt purely smug that Jack Spicer was all his.

When Jack finally sagged in Chase's arms, his own limbs dangling limp and useless in the aftermath of his release, Chase gave a soft, dark chuckle and kissed gently at Jack's lax mouth.

Gathering the drowsy, satiated form against him, Chase concentrated his magic and jumped them through time and space – a short hop sideways – to his bedroom. Laying Jack out on the bed, he quickly stripped the limp body of clothing. Making a quick detour to his bathroom, he took up a washcloth, dampened it at the sink, and then returned to clean the sticky evidence of orgasm from Jack's skin.

Once that task was done, he tugged the covers from beneath his lover and then rolled Jack into his usual sleeping spot close to the center of the large bed.

He was tugging the covers up to the slender white shoulders when Jack opened his eyes, just a little bit, and smiled at him.

"S'awesome," he murmured drowsily, and Chase smirked.

"I know," he replied, and finished tucking his lover in.

"Wha' 'bout you?"

"Later," he answered, and bent to kiss Jack's mouth briefly. "Get some rest, xin ài. We'll play together later, I promise."

"Can't wait," came the low, slurring reply.

And then, Jack was out like the proverbial light.

Chase grinned and headed into his bathroom to get a little relief of his own before he went to see what had become of his guests.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Ed charged up three-and-a-half flights of stairs; Mustang's butt-skirt – flying out from the force of the man's stride – always in constant view. When it disappeared over the last riser and he didn't see the familiar black hair and broad, blue-covered shoulders appear, Ed ground his teeth tighter together and raced up to the next landing and ducked right down the hallway.

"Hey!" he called out, but his shout lacked his usual force, out of breath as he was. He paused for a moment, sucked in a few quick gulps of air, and then bellowed, "DON'T WALK AWAY, YOU DUMB BASTARD ! I'M TRYIN' TO APOLOGIZE!"

He saw Mustang freeze in his stride momentarily. And then, the man charged ahead even faster.

Ed _growled_ as he realized he'd just insulted the man _again_.

_Nothin' for it,_ he thought, and ran as fast as he could down the hall after his commanding officer.

Once he was close enough, he shouted, "ROY MUSTANG! STOP!"

And then, he skidded to a halt, arms wind-milling when Colonel Mustang whirled around with his white-gloved hand extended and fingers curled to snap.

They stood a few feet from each other; both of them perfectly still.

Finally, Mustang asked in a tone so Ed thought ice would shiver at hearing it: "What the hell do you want, _Mister_ Elric?"

Ed's eyes widened for a brief moment, but then his customary scowl took its usual place on his face.

"Look," he said, "I'm trying to apologize—“

"By _further_ insulting me?" barked Roy incredulously.

"Oh, don't act so surprised," snapped Ed imperiously. "You _know_ what I'm like."

"There are times I forget – more the fool, me," sneered Roy.

"What's _that_ supposed to mean?!"

"It means there are times you show traits of decency and sensitivity in direct counterpoint to your abrasive, conceited, infuriating personality! Traits I would _prefer_ to see more of, considering everything I've _done_ for you!"

"Oh, yeah?" It was on the tip of his tongue to ask 'Like what?' but Ed knew. He knew very well everything Roy Mustang had done for him and his brother. It was a massive debt to repay, but someday, he would do it – not counting all the stupid, life-endangering, _Al_ -endangering missions the arrogant jerk had sent him on.

"If you have nothing further to say—“ began the colonel, but Ed held up a hand.

"No, wait," said the blond alchemist, and he gentled his tone; softened it so that his words would be taken more seriously. "What I said back there was rude and thoughtless to your position as my commanding officer and, for the duration of this mission, my teammate. It was hitting below the belt to ridicule you in front of a dangerous opponent, and I'm sorry for degrading you instead of supporting you as I should have done."

It _tore_ at him to say those words. Even if they were true, he _resented_ that he had to say them at all – especially to this man who took great delight in teasing him _all the fucking time_.

Narrow black eyes watched him without blinking and Ed sternly controlled the urge to fidget.

He was unprepared for what Roy did next.

The white-gloved hand uncurled and Ed relaxed only slightly. He had learned the hard way that the man had quite a few tricks up his sleeves. To his surprise, Mustang suddenly lunged forward and those strong, graceful hands were gripping him _tightly_ by the upper arms. Ed found himself turned and slammed up against the smooth rock wall that had been to his right.

"What the hell are you doing?!" he shouted and struggled; trying to bring his automail leg up to do damage, but Mustang had crowded in _close_.

Ed shivered violently when those snapping black eyes were suddenly _very_ close in front of him. He was startled at the amount of fury in those bottomless black irises.

"Let me make one thing _perfectly_ clear that I had thought you understood from the get-go," Roy growled quietly. His voice was no longer cold; it was now rippling with heat the way desert sand did a shimmer-dance under a blazing noon sun. "I _am_ your commanding officer. I am _also_ your teammate. I always _have been_ , no matter _what_ my title is or your position... _beneath_ me."

Ed's eyes went wide and he froze; hating himself for feeling excited at how promising that tone sounded.

"What we do is not merely a game of giving and taking orders, Fullmetal – I give you orders to take care of things that require your skills and I rely on you to do your duty so well that I may then turn my attention to matters that require _my_ skills. It is true that I could probably handle the missions on my own if I were in that situation, but the same can't be said of you when it comes to politics. That is _my_ arena; running around and blowing things up at a whim is _yours_. Our abilities complement each other and _that is how we are a team, no matter where we are or what we're doing."_

Ed opened his mouth to retort...

...and found he didn't know what to say.

Roy smirked down at the young man he held pinned against the wall. It was tempting – so _very_ tempting – to lean down and kiss that open mouth wider.

But, he wouldn't. Ed had given him no solid clue that he would be amenable to such things and Roy, despite his flaws, was no monster.

Carefully, he uncurled his fingers from around the smaller man's arms and let Ed's heels touch the ground again with a thump.

Still giving a cool, mocking smile, he bowed with exaggerated politeness. "Good evening, Edward."

Without another word, he turned and walked away to the end of the hall, where he let himself into the room Chase had given the two of them to share. As he shut the door, he half-considered locking it, but knew it was a futile gesture; Ed would be able to transmute it open while half-unconscious.

Walking over to his bed, he flopped down on it while still fully clothed. Tucking one arm beneath his head, he stared up at the rock ceiling overhead and let his mind wander.

Out in the hallway, Ed still hadn't moved from where he'd been put against the wall. His mind was spinning with all the new information he'd learned.

Eventually, he blinked, and wandered away – back towards the open courtyard.

He had a lot to think about.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Ed had no real destination in mind. He was simply striding through the halls, up and down stairs, and over bridges because if he stayed still, he would go mental.

Life was getting _way_ too weird – _his_ life in particular.

First, he and Mustang had been picked up from their world and dropped off in a new world that was far more advanced than their own, except there was no alchemy. According to the mangy lizard that owned the castle he was staying in, the only reason he and Roy could still access their alchemy was because of the Shin-Gonger thingy they'd used to travel had created some sort of biofeedback loop that connected them – Aw, to hell with it!

It didn't matter. He was just _grateful_ he could still access alchemy. Things were already screwed up enough as it was without throwing _that_ wrench into the gears.

Ed stormed down a hall and emerged into a very large, circular room. It was bare except for a few padded mats scattered around the edges, and lots and lots of weapons stuck to the wall. He stopped and turned a slow circle, looking at the staffs, swords, daggers, and various other instruments of wicked pain and possible death. A moment later, he looked up, and saw several ropes and chains suspended from the ceiling and wondered what they were used for.

Shaking his head and wondering how he got himself into these messes, Ed went to inspect the pair of wooden swords on one wall. He stared up at them, not attempting to reach for them, as he contemplated using them to beat Mustang _back_ into his senses. Clearly, the man had lost his mind if he was cozying up to _him_.

In his mind's eye, Ed saw the beautifully carved, lacquered swords burn to cinders in seconds as Mustang flash-fried them.

Growling, Ed shook his head and turned away.

"Rrrrrrrrrr! It isn't _fair!_ " he suddenly howled up to the ropes and chains dangling from the ceiling. "I've done _everything_ I could – _given_ everything I could! – to the search for the Philosopher's Stone, and what do I get? Saddled with a randy, disturbing bastard of a colonel and thrown into this crazy-assed world where I can't _do_ anything!"

"It's true," came a smooth, mellow voice from the shadows. "It _isn't_ fair. I was enjoying the fruits of my lover's passion after a long absence when I was interrupted and 'saddled' with two over-excitable alchemists who spend most of their time at each other's throats."

Chase Young prowled around the room, slipping in and out of the shadows silently, only the yellow gleam of his eyes standing out.

"One of whom has _very unwisely_ decided to take an interest in _my_ lover and the other has decided to tear himself apart; I suspect he does so _because_ of the fire-dancer's interest in my lover."

Chase paused before the display of the lacquered swords.

"Are you simply going to stand there and stew or are you going to do something?"

"What the hell do _you_ care if I do something or—HEY!" Ed wheeled around and glared at Chase while baring his teeth. "I do _not_ give a shit if Mustang wants to hump your pet albino!"

"Oh, yes?" A smirked played around Chase's lips. "I think you would find the world much less irritating if you took the initiative to stop lying to yourself, Edward." 

The dragon-lord flashed forward and started to stalk around the small youth.

"I've _seen_ the way you look at him, Edward. I hear your pulse skyrocket when he touches you and I have a very keen sense of smell. Have pheromones been discovered on your world yet? I can smell your lust, little one."

Human, gold eyes went wide and already pale skin went paler.

Then, with a snarl, Ed clapped his hands together, stretched a spike out from his metal forearm, and lunged forward with every intention of slamming the spike straight through Young's head.

Chase wasn't there anymore.

There was a shimmer of dark movement and speed and the dragon-lord landed lightly on one of the squat pillars that picked out the sparring area. He smiled lightly and spread his hands supplication, a mocking smile on his face.

"I think the lady doth protest too much, Edward."

Ed jerked back, twisted right, his teeth still bared. Then, yowling in rage, he leaped high, hard, and fast, and came down at Chase feet-first.

Chase stood with his hand raised, ready to catch and deflect Ed immediately, only to stare in surprise as Elric landed on the floor.

Ed shouted a bark of harsh laughter as he landed on the floor at the base of the pedestal. Moving quickly, he spun to build yet more force and lashed out, shattering the pedestal and sending Young flying.

Chase recovered quickly, twisting in midair to land on his feet. The dragon-lord was back to the young alchemist instantly, swinging one leg up and bringing the heel down with shattering force.

Ed jumped his feet apart and braced his right arm over his head, allowing his automail to absorb the devastating force of Chase Young's downward strike. He took the momentum of the down-kick to help speed him to the floor; pressing his palm to the floor and pivoting his body to snap his shins – metal and flesh – against Young's right thigh and hip.

Then, he crumbled down onto his shoulder and rolled away as swiftly as he could.

Chase twisted with the blow to lessen the force and smiled grimly.

It was refreshing to spar with someone new, who could challenge him more than those worthless monks. As Edward rolled, the dragon-lord cartwheeled along with the small blond, smashing ferocious blows into the floor; barely missing Ed's head and hands. The Tai Chi master was idly curious as to how long Edward could roll before becoming dizzy.

Ed rolled and rolled, ignoring the disorientation from the dizzying rotation, and waited-waited-waited—there!

The instant both of Young's hands were on the floor, Ed spun to face the dragon-lord and locked his ankles around the man's wrists, and then spun away again, pulling Chase down onto the floor.

Twisting up onto one knee and then his feet, Ed gathered himself and aimed a punch with his now spike-less fist straight for Young's face.

Chase twisted his head sharply, grimacing as Ed's fist slammed into his hair, yanking it, then the automail caught several locks of glistening black and yanked them _out_.

Snarling, the dragon-lord wrenched his wrists from Ed's ankles and smashed one fist into the youth's metal shoulder.

"Do _NOT_ touch my hair!"

Ed skidded across the floor on his butt and then bounced off the wall when he finally slammed into it. He hit the floor _hard_ on his front, but didn't pause to acknowledge any pain.

Instantly, he got up onto his feet and assumed a defensive pose while smirking.

"Oh, sorry, _Miss_ Young – didn't know touching hair around here was so taboo!"

"Only when it's _my_ hair," Chase growled, running his fingers through it fussily. "Arrogant brat! In my kingdom, I have slain men for daring to touch my _armor_. You should be grateful you still draw breath after pulling my hair out. Maybe I'll claim that golden braid of yours in lieu of absolution."

Chase flashed forward, one arm raised as if to grab at Ed's hair but the dragon-lord feinted and swept a leg at the alchemist's ankles.

Ed couldn't move to counter it – that's how fast Chase Young was.

The next thing he knew, his teeth and eyeballs were still rattling in his head after he landed hard on his back; propelled downward by the hand Young had planted on his chest to pin him down with.

He stared up at the man perched so preternaturally still above him and bared his teeth in another snarl.

"Get _off_ me, you crazy lunatic psycho!" he ordered in a near shriek.

"Oh no, Edward," Chase purred with a wicked grin. "I have warned you again and again about showing respect to the master of this house, and again and again you behave like a spoiled child. So I _am_ taking your hair as payment." 

The dragon-lord held out one hand and a curved knife hanging on the wall flew into it. Before the slight youth could protest, Chase flipped him onto his stomach. Elric tried to fight the move with his right arm, but Young put a knee between his shoulder blades and forced him down, the metal protesting the whole way.

There was a swift movement and Ed felt a cool breeze on the nape of his neck. Fine golden hair cascaded around his ears, free and suddenly a lot shorter.

Ed froze.

He went utterly, totally, completely still.

The sound of his blood rushing in his ears was the only thing he could hear. The skin of his face, neck, and ears went hotter and hotter as blood suffused those areas.

Even when the weight lifted off of him and the heat of the dragon-lord moved away, Ed remained where he was.

Several moments later, Ed finally turned his head and discovered himself to be alone in the sparring room.

A few moments after that, he began decimating the room as he unleashed his rage at having been beaten so thoroughly.

 

*~*~*~*

 

The next morning, at the breakfast table, the atmosphere was quiet.

Chase and Jack were not particularly upset about anything. They ate calmly and, beneath the cover of the table, Jack occasionally stroked Chase's leg with his bare foot. He wasn't trying to entice his lover; he was _petting_ the dragon-lord – telling him without words his contentment in being with Chase and for the pleasure given the evening before.

Roy and Edward, however, were both silent; their minds heavy with serious thoughts, and perhaps a little shock, still, that Ed’s hair had been cut so short.

Chase had made it clear when Roy had confronted him about it before they’d sat down to table that he was not interested in arguing about it.

With his stomach already sour with anger, Mustang had sat down, along with a strangely quiet Edward.

Towards the end of the meal, Chase lightly cleared his throat, and everyone looked at him.

"There is something I must check on today. I will be out of touch. I assume the three of you can keep yourselves entertained?"

The cold look in his gaze, when he stared at Mustang, was a silent reminder to the alchemist to honor his word about leaving Jack alone in a romantic sense.

Jack nodded. "I've still got a lot of stuff to compile for them to take back. It'd be easier if they had computers, 'cause then I could just put it all to a flash drive and be done with it. But, if they had computers, they wouldn't need my technology instructions."

Ed blinked, his venom at having his hair messed with momentarily on hold. Curious as always, he asked, "What's a computer?"

"It's a machine that can hold data stored electronically. Think of an entire library of books. A computer can hold the same information you'd find in the books only in an electronic form. You'd read it on an attached device called a monitor screen. You wouldn't be holding a book in your hands, but you'd still have the same information. And, because it's in electronic format, it can be transferred and kept safe and copied a _lot_ easier," Jack informed them.

Roy and Ed looked at each other, and then back to the albino genius.

"What about military records?" asked the colonel.

"Yeah. The various militaries all over our world rely almost entirely on computers to keep track of their records."

Roy's eyes sparkled and he smirked slightly. "Does it save time on paperwork?"

"Well... Think of one of your standard requisition forms. How does that get made?"

"A typesetter creates the form and then runs off several print-copies."

"And because it's type-set, there's always messy mistakes that means it has to be done over and over again, which means just _creating_ the forms is time consuming. Then, there are all the forms that get wasted when they have to be tossed out because of a mistake...."

Roy nodded.

"By keeping the standard form on the computer, all you'd have to do is type what you need into the form and, because it's a computer, if you make a mistake, that mistake can be instantly erased and the correction put in place _before_ it gets printed out."

Roy's eyes widened. Then, shamelessly, he grinned and wheedled, "Jaaaaaack..."

The albino youth snorted a laugh. "I'll make sure plans for a computer and all its requisite attachments are included."

"Even then, you'd better not be hoping it happens immediately," counseled Ed, and for once, his voice wasn't biting as he spoke to his leader. "You know the scientists are going to have to examine, cross-examine, and cross- _cross_ -examine everything before they even get around to discussing the pros and cons of this stuff in various committees."

Roy snorted. "There are times that living in a fascist state comes in handy. I'm certain the chain of command will want to put in place immediately whatever enhances our fighting forces."

"But those are the weapons. Computers don't sound like weapons; they're archiving machines."

Roy frowned. "But, if they free up the office staff – like me, the other colonels, and the generals..."

Ed grinned. "Or, they'll make you so much faster at it that you'll have twice or even three times the paperwork."

Mustang blanched. "I... hadn't thought about that."

Jack grinned. "That could happen. But there's always ways around paperwork. Besides, even if the military doesn't make use of it, there are always public libraries and schools."

The two alchemists considered that.

"There are always pros and cons to every new advancement," murmured Chase. "The simple decision must be made that the pros outweigh the cons."

Roy nodded slowly. "True." He glanced at Ed. "And not for us to decide. We have our agenda in place already; that must take precedence. Fullmetal _is_ correct: it will take time before computers are introduced to Amestris' military. The weapons, assuredly, will be given all due haste, but the computers will most likely wait."

Ed nodded and went back to bolting down his breakfast; eating as gracelessly quick as he always did.

The table fell silent again as each man went back to their meal.

Nearly ten minutes later, Chase finished his meal. He polished off his cup of tea to clear his palate, and then used his napkin to wipe his lips clean. Leaning over, he nuzzled gently against Jack, who leaned in to the caress.

"I'll return in a few hours. Will you be alright until then?" murmured the dragon-lord.

Jack grinned and nuzzled against his lover. "I'll be fine. Do whatever you need to do." He angled for a kiss and received one. "If you need me, you know how to reach me."

Chase grinned. "I don't anticipate requiring your assistance, but I do, indeed, know I can rely upon it."

The grin Spicer gave him was pleased and somewhat smug.

Ed grimaced. "Do you _have_ to make kissy-face at the table? Some of us are still trying to eat!"

Chase gave him a quelling stare. "This is _my_ table and _my_ lover. I shall kiss him if I want to."

"Besides, you're always eating," said Jack sneeringly. "It's a miracle your butt isn't any fatter than it already is."

Ed lunged up out of his seat, intent on scrambling across the table to get to Jack, but Mustang was on the ball. He simply stood up, caught Ed, tucked him onto his hip, and walked away with a nod to Chase.

"Hey! HEY!! Put me down! No! Take me _back_ there! He called me _fat!_ " howled Ed as he struggled and kicked.

"I know, but he got the wrong part of you. He should have been talking about your _head_ ," grumbled the Flame Alchemist.

"Y'know, it's not very effective when you use my own insults against me."

"No, you said Young shouldn't eat my head because it's too _dense_ and fat."

Ed snorted, but he did stop fighting.

Gratefully, Roy stopped walking and put the younger alchemist down. Never minding the automail, that left Ed's flesh-and-blood bodyweight to deal with. While Elric was of slight stature, he _was_ muscular, and muscle was _heavy_.

Ed tugged his jacket down and brushed at the hips of his pants irritably. He scowled up at Roy.

"What'd ya drag me off for? I wasn't finished eating!"

"Because I'm not in the mood for a fight and I'm certain Young isn't, either. I'm fairly sure that he's giving the same lecture to _his_..." Roy scrambled to change his wording quickly. "...ah, 'subordinate', too."

Close; so close. He'd nearly said 'lover.'

Ed snorted. " _What_ lecture?"

" _This_ one: Ed, stop trying to fight Jack. It's wasting time we need to prepare for going home. I believe Chase's errand today pertains to that."

"What do we need _him_ for? We have the Sì Xing Máng; we can go home anytime we like!"

"Recall, if you will, that he said he'd look into the possible whereabouts of the Philosopher's Stone for us," said Roy.

"Yeah. And if _that_ isn't a pact with the devil—“

Roy shook his head. "He's looking of his _own_ accord. The pact would be what he expects in _trade_ for it."

Ed paused, and then looked at his colonel shrewdly. "You have a plan?"

Mustang casually glanced around, and then lowered his voice significantly.

"I've already proven that I can hold my own in a fight against him. Between the _two of us..."_

Ed grinned. "Even if Spicer _does_ use some of his fancy weapons, I can take him out quick. And then, we could tag-team the demon-beast, snag the Philosopher's Stone, and hightail it back home!"

Roy sighed. "I don't _like_ it... but that's the only thing I can think of to get us what we need."

"What's not to like? It's a brilliant plan!"

"It lacks _honor_. For God's sake, Ed, I'm talking about attacking a man who has hosted us in his home!"

Ed rolled his eyes. "Don't be such a pussy, Roy. Sometimes, the ends justify the means."

Black eyes widened in shock. "What did you say?"

"I said, sometimes the ends—“

"No, not that - the _other_ one!"

"What about it?"

"I've _never_ heard you say that before!"

"Oh, get _over_ it. So I've learned a new word!"

Roy frowned. "Yes, well, don't use it on _me_. I'm still your superior officer."

" _Commanding_ officer; 'superior' is debatable," snarked Ed.

Roy's scowl darkened. "You're digging your own grave, Fullmetal."

"I've been doing that since the day I tried to bring Mom back," said Ed quietly. "So long as Al gets restored... I don't care."

Mustang's expression softened. Reaching out, he gently touched one finger to Ed's left cheek and waited for those big, gold eyes to look at him.

"I won't let that happen," he said quietly. "I won't lose _either_ of you."

Ed's eyes widened in shock. Then, hesitantly, he offered a grin.

"You're such a pansy," he said, but the insult lacked heat.

Roy grinned and drew his hand back and the two men were silent for a few moments.

"So," said Ed brusquely. "About the plan..."

"Yes. It will get us what we want. I'm just uncomfortable with it."

"Like he wouldn't do worse to us."

" _We_ haven't hosted him in our homes. Here's hoping we never _have_ to. But, I think I have a compromise to the problem."

"What's that?"

"We use the Philosopher's Stone to accomplish our plans, and then we sen—“

"SEND IT BACK?! Are you _NUTS?!_ " Ed screamed, instantly outraged.

"Lower your voice!" Roy hissed.

"No! Do you _realize_ what you're saying? You're talking about giving up the—“

Roy's hand lashed out and clamped around Ed's face, muffling the words "Philosopher's Stone," and then fell away when Ed smacked it off of him.

"—don't _ever_ do that again, you bastard!" yowled the smaller alchemist. "Never mind that! You _know_ what that thing can accomplish! There's _so much_ injustice in the world that can be set right, and you—“

"We can't rely on alchemy to take care of _everything_ ," growled Roy. "We _must_ be able to govern ourselves without being dependent on external means! Ed, for God's sake, if we _can't_ take care of our own problems, then what's the point of continuing on? We have to try and succeed – or fail – on our own with _minimal_ help. That's why only a _few_ people ever become true alchemists. We're outnumbered by five-to-one when you stand us against the non-alchemy practicing populace; you know that!"

"But—!“

"No! I grant you, Ed, the... you know... will _help_ , yes, but I'll be damned if I let us become reliant upon it! I can't speak for you, but _I_ intend to be a man who can stand and face troubles on his own two feet!"

"Easy for _you_ to say – you _have_ your own two feet!"

"You won't be able to use that excuse for much longer! When you have your body back to normal, what will you use _then?_ "

Ed opened his mouth to retort... but nothing came forth.

Sensing an opening, Roy continued speaking quietly. "What will you do, Edward? Use the Stone to _force_ the world to your own fantasy of how it should be? Whole families living merrily together without petty fights or larger ones? No wars to keep the population in check, no diseases?"

"I..."

"That isn't natural, Ed, and you know it. That's _stagnation_ and such a thing is abhorrent to alchemists. We ebb and flow with the nature we draw from. To do anything _else_ is hubris and disrupts the flow."

"But..."

Roy reached out and cupped Ed's face in his hands. Holding the youth steady, he bent to touch his forehead to the shorter man's. "Ed... Fixing Al and yourself, that's acceptable. Using the Stone to depose the Homunculi... that's acceptable. But, when I take over the Führership, I want to do it knowing that I'm making things better through my _own_ efforts... and the efforts of the people working hard with me. I want _people_ at my side, Edward; people I _trust_." He stroked his thumbs over the younger man's cheeks. "I want _you_ there. Not the Stone guided by your hand; _you_."

Ed was shivering as he stood quiescently in Mustang's grip.

"I realize I haven't done such a great job of showing it to a young man who's already been turned into a hardened cynic," added Roy, "but I _trust_ you, Edward Elric. I believe in you and your abilities. And I _need_ your help. Please... Ed, please... ignore the lure of the Stone. Stand by me on your own two feet."

Ed blinked and swallowed roughly. He was silent for a long, long time, but Roy didn't let go of him. He felt the heat and the security of the man looming over him; surrounding him and supporting him with strength and honor.

Finally, he nodded slowly. "O... Okay. When Al is – when we're _both_ fixed, and when the Homunculi are gone. We'll send it back." He tried for, and managed, a grin. "B-Besides... if it stays in our world, we'd only end up having to fight off every other alchemist that wants to use it for greed and power."

Roy smiled. "I knew you'd understand. I can always count on you to see the logic behind everything."

"Doesn't mean I like it."

"No. If it could be perfectly used... I'd be more tempted. But I can't trust that the Stone will bring harmony; only strife. I can trust that the strife _you_ create when you put your mind and skill to work will bring harmony."

"You're _such_ a sap," complained Ed, but he liked the electric thrill of warmth and pride he felt at hearing Mustang speak like this to him.

Roy shifted his grip. Letting go of Ed's face, he wrapped his arms around the younger man and pulled him into a hug. After a moment, Ed's arms came up around Mustang's ribs, and he held on tight.

"Team... right?" asked Ed quietly.

"Team, always," responded Roy.

The two men rested in each other's embrace, relishing the connection they'd formed.

 

*~*~*~*

He didn't... understand.

He didn't understand how Roy came to be with him in the bed. He didn't know _how_ they got to this particular bed. The sheets and pillowcases were white. They were surrounded not by the rock walls and torchlight of Chase Young's palace, but by a soft, soothing white light. So much _white_ should have hurt the eyes, but Ed felt a strange peace he'd never experienced before. He had no worries, no fears. The light was warmth and comfort, and so was the man hovering over him.

Roy was as naked as he was, and Ed shivered at the sight of the smile the older man gave him. He shivered again when he felt Roy shift and realized the man's hips were between his legs. His toes curled, but he could only feel the flesh of Roy's leg against the toes of his right foot. Entranced by all that smooth warmth, Ed stroked his foot over the older man's calf even as he brought up his left hand to smooth it over Roy's sleek, muscular chest.

He grinned at the way those gorgeous cat-eyes half-closed; at the appreciative murmur Roy gave. He liked the way the man arched trustingly into his touch.

To his surprise, Roy caught hold of his right hand and brought it to his face. He watched, wide-eyed and barely breathing, as Mustang breathed warmly against the palm and then nuzzled his face into the ugly metal "skin".

"Roy," he said, and didn't understand why he sounded as though he were trying to speak underwater. It didn't matter. "Roy—“

"Ed." He saw Roy's mouth move, but he didn't hear the colonel's voice. Not with his ears. It seemed, more, that he _sensed_ Mustang's voice in his mind – in his soul – than with his ears.

He wanted to ask why they were like this, but he didn't have to. He knew why they were there. He knew why he was naked beneath Roy and why it didn't frighten him.

A deliciously heavy, liquid sensation filled his groin, and Ed shivered and moaned in the grip of lust. He so rarely felt this way. No... he’d _never_ felt this way. He was used to his body's autonomous functions and he dealt with them perfunctorily. This... This was new and heady and wonderful. This was something _special_ because it was caused by, was _with_ , another person.

He hungered for Roy Mustang in a way he never had before. He'd always coveted the man's power and strength and beauty, but he'd always wanted those things for himself.

This... wanting Roy to keep his attributes and _share_ them with him... this was new in a really good way.

He wanted Roy to be beautiful so he could _look_ at the man and enjoy the sight of him.

Ed wanted Mustang to be strong enough to hold him without faltering.

He wanted his colonel to be powerful against him....

Ed wanted Mustang to kiss him, and so he pulled Roy's head down towards him. Clumsily, he fit his mouth against the older man's, and purred quietly when Mustang took control of the kiss; guiding him with gentle nips and soft touches of tongue into taking and tasting and sharing the kiss back with Roy.

So much smooth, warm skin was against him, and Ed moaned and murmured with pleasure at the sensation. Knowing how shockingly cold his automail could be if he _wasn’t_ in the desert, Ed politely tried to keep his metal limbs away from the man above him. Roy surprised him by coaxing and tugging Ed’s arm up around his shoulders; Ed’s leg around his waist to join his other one.

The younger alchemist had to break the kiss – had to break away so he could fight back the silly, stupid tears that stung his eyes.

He understood _that_ ; Roy’s silent message… he understood that.

Roy wanted _all_ of him… the bad _with_ the good.

Tucking his face against the older man’s neck, Ed muttered, “I think I love you.”

A soft, warm chuckle; so not like Roy’s usual biting, sarcastic laughs, and Ed felt another thrill at being allowed something he instinctively knew was private to Mustang.

“I love you,” he said, and this time, _Roy_ moaned.

And then, Ed was being kissed and it wasn’t gentle this time; wasn’t respectful. This time, Roy was _taking_ what he wanted and Ed was glad to give it to him, because he wanted it, too.

To his shock, Roy began to move above him, between his legs, and where he and the older man were pressed together, the most _gorgeous_ friction began. Ed cried out, startled, and then groaned with pleasure as Roy sucked on his tongue and _moved_ against him.

His head tipped back, allowing Roy’s mouth to nip and suck at his neck – allowed strong, white teeth to bite – and clung hard to his _lover_ as he began to move frantically against Mustang, trying to give that same pleasure to this beautiful, cunning, infuriating man that he loved so _goddamned_ much.

They moved and stroked each other with bodies and lips, fingers and tongues. The light grew brighter around them as the ecstasy pulsed higher and higher, and Ed was vaguely aware of the love-words he was murmuring. He cared more about the love-words _Roy_ was saying to _him_.

And then, there was no more time to think, to speak. There was only action as he rocked and rode desperately quick beneath his lover. He begged for Roy to help him and the older man responded by pushing down, grinding up, and going faster-faster-faster.

When Ed climaxed, holding tight and hard and greedily to his colonel, he screamed his love for the world to hear.

The sound of his own scream startled him awake.

Ed thrashed upright and clapped his hands together, calling upon the power within him. He looked around, trying to meet the source of the danger, and then sighed when he realized he was alone in the bedroom.

Disgusted with himself, he pulled his hands away and felt the heavy, tingling reluctance of the power build-up that hovered, waiting for him to unleash it. Ed shifted, ready to ignore it and lay back down, and paused at the stickiness of the sheet over his lap.

Glancing down, he peeled it away and was horrified to realize he’d orgasmed because of that… He didn’t want to call it a dream. _Dream_ meant something pleasant and longed for. He didn’t want to admit to either one. But, to be fair, it wasn’t actually a nightmare... So what did he call it?

“It was _something_ ,” he growled to himself, and then became aware of growling beyond the door and a heavy scrape-drag against the stone.

“I’m alright!” he roared angrily to the beast that had undoubtedly been guarding the door and had heard his initial shout. “I’m fine! Just a… I was asleep!”

The scraping ceased and there was a muffled noise. Given that there was no further attempt to get into the room, Ed figured his guard had heard and understood.

Sighing roughly, he raked his hands through his hair and felt the static charge of the power still lingering inside crackle and raise the strands of his now-short hair.

“Well, this needs cleaning anyway,” he muttered, and he stood up out of the bed.

Clapping his hands together once again, he bent and pressed them to the bed. Light washed over the sheets as his powerful will demanded that the sheets rearrange their molecular structure to his satisfaction, and then reform once the stains he’d left upon them had been removed from the fabric weave.

The light of the transfiguration faded and he grinned, pleased with himself as always.

“There. Smell better, too,” he grunted, and turned to go into the bathroom so he could clean himself up.

When he left the bathroom, it took five steps before he realized Mustang was in the room with him.

“Nice view, Ed,” called the colonel even as the blond youth yelped, spun, and dove back into the bathroom.

“You _bastard!_ ” Ed howled, outraged. “Why didn’t you call out when you came in?”

“Didn’t think you’d hear me over the water running and I wasn’t about to risk an automail spike through my head by barging in just to announce my presence.” Mustang’s reply came through the open door, as did Ed’s clothing.

Elric snatched the pants and shirt out of the air before they could hit the ground. He wriggled into his clothing, tucking the black sleeveless shirt into the waistband of his trousers, and then stomped out into the room he shared with the colonel. His automail foot struck sound and sparks off the stone floor before his feet touched the first of the thick, cozy area rugs scattered about.

Roy was grinning at him. “Why are you growling at me for doing the sensible thing, Fullmetal?”

“Because I _can_ ,” he muttered, and began finger-combing his hair. “What’re you doing here?”

“I came to see if you were still sacked out. If you were, I’d have let you sleep, but since you’re awake… Chase is back.”

“Did he find it?” Ed asked instantly, forgetting about his hair.

Roy admired the thick, bright gold hair that framed Ed’s lovely face. He missed the length of it; missed seeing it draped over strong, young shoulders and down a strong, young back. His resentment towards Chase for the attack grew in strength as he mourned the loss of seeing Ed with his hair down. Only for a moment, and then walked over to the younger man, who surprisingly stiffened at his approach.

“Relax, Ed,” he said casually. “Team, remember?”

Ed scowled and remained tense, but he relaxed from his intention to scoot away from Mustang.

To his surprise, he felt a comb being pulled through his hair. “Where’d you get that?”

“I keep one with me. As an officer, I must be prepared to give a good impression of the Army in case reporters question me or if I’m abruptly summoned to a superior’s office,” replied Mustang.

Ed rolled his eyes, but said nothing. He was enjoying the combing far too much.

Roy grinned as a humming sound drifted up from Ed’s throat. The younger alchemist was all but purring under his touch.

“As to whether or not Chase found the Philosopher’s Stone, I don’t know,” Mustang said calmly. “He said neither nay nor yea. I don’t dare extrapolate from his current mood, either. He’s far too self-controlled; he can give us any mood he wishes us to see.”

“He wasn’t carrying it?”

“No, but that doesn’t mean anything. He could easily have stashed it before speaking to me.”

“Hmmm. Y’know, if we go searching for it, we won’t have to—“

“I thought of that, but the odds of success are slim-to-none. This place is a _mountain_ , Ed. It’s also Young’s territory, and thus he knows every nook and cranny in this place. There is, also, our ever-present guards _and_ the fact that Chase uses _magic_. If this place was smaller, we might stand a better chance, but for now, the cons outweigh the pros.”

Ed sighed. “Yeah, I know. Guess we’re just gonna have to fight ‘im for it.”

“Yes, unfortunately. I dislike attacking the man, even though he’s evil.”

“Yeah. For an evil guy, he’s been pretty decent - even if he _did_ try to kill you.”

Roy blinked, and then smiled. Putting away the comb, he teased lightly, “Is that anger I hear in your voice?”

“Of course it is, you idiot! I heard a commotion and when I came out to investigate, there you were being chased by a _nightmare!_ He was about to _kill_ you!”

“That displeased you?”

Ed growled; a horrible sound. “Did you _really_ think I’d enjoy seeing you get torn apart?”

“From the way you’ve tried it a few times yourself—“

Ed waved a dismissive hand. “That’s _me_.”

Roy’s grin widened. “Ah. So far as you’re concerned, the only one allowed to damage me is you, correct?”

Elric nodded shortly. “ _Anyone_ gets to kick your butt, it’s gonna be _me_.”

“Didn’t work so well the last time you tried it.”

“You _cheated!_ ”

“I _had_ to. Ours wasn’t a battle of alchemy, Ed – it was a battle of wits.” Mustang gave a soft sigh. “I prefer your hair long. You don’t look _quite_ so untouchably young with _long_ hair.”

The younger alchemist fished blinked and then gave a startled look over his shoulder.

“So, what you’re saying,” he said slowly as his brain creaked back into motion, “was that our alchemy was evenly matched… but you needed every trick you could think of to win?”

Oh, damn, if that didn’t make his ego feel _good_.

Roy snorted. “I already knew how wily you were. _I’m_ not without my own deviousness. I couldn’t afford to play fair or nice; not if I wanted to prove my ability to command you.”

Ed blinked and then spun around when he felt the colonel’s hands fall away from his hair. “Whaddya mean ‘prove you could command me’?!”

A single eyebrow swept upwards. “Edward. Are you really going to stand there and tell me that you would accept me as your leader if I hadn’t been able to beat you? The only reason you consent to follow my orders is because you know, instinctively, that I’ve given them for a solid reason, if not a good one. Whether you openly admit it or not, you do have _some_ faith that I can make intelligent leadership decisions. Your faith is the only thing that’s allowing you to risk Al when you go out on assignment.”

Ed gaped at Mustang. He didn’t know what shocked him worse: that Roy knew he trusted him or that _he_ hadn’t known he trusted Roy.

“I had only that one chance to win you for good,” the colonel said with a slight smile on his face. “If I lost _to_ you, I lost _you_. I couldn’t afford that.”

“That… you…”

Roy’s grin widened. “And, I thank you for putting your faith in me. I’m going to be counting on it when it comes time to challenge Young. In the meantime… Are you done napping?”

“I’m _dressed_ , aren’t I?”

“I didn’t know if you were getting dressed because you thought there was something to do.”

“Isn’t there?”

“Not now. You could go back to sleep if you want.”

Ed thought about it, and then shook his head. “I’d rather stay up. That way, if we don’t challenge him today, when _you_ get some rest, I can too, and we’ll be in synch.”

Mustang nodded. “Excellent thinking.”

“I might go bug Jack for a bit. See if that computer thing is really worth it.”

A _huge_ smile flicked across Roy’s face and Ed would have sworn on a holy book then and there that the jet-black eyes sparkled with glee.

“I can’t _wait_ for our world to incorporate that technology,” Roy said, and his tone was positively giddy. “While you were napping, Jack showed me some of how it worked, and then told me there’s a thing called the ‘Internet’ where computers all over the world can be hooked together through telephone lines to transmit data instantaneously. He showed me something he called an ‘online encyclopedia’ and – Ed, it was amazing! – there were pages upon pages upon _pages_ of information on alchemy and the history of it!”

Ed’s eyes widened. “You’re kidding!”

Roy raised his right hand. “I swear on my alchemy I’m not!”

Without another word, Ed turned and headed for the door.

“Without your boots or jacket?” called Mustang.

“Who the hell _cares?_ ” Ed yelled, excited. “There’s… there’s _information_ to be had!”

He was out the door and down the hallway before Roy could reply.

The colonel sighed and shook his head. “Not if Young and his lovely young man are still cuddling.”

He went to collect Ed’s jacket and boots, and then moved off down the hall. One of the cats that had been outside when he came in was gone; the other was still waiting on him.

Without a word, he took off down the hall in pursuit of Ed.

 

*~*~*

 

When Edward arrived at the lab, he stopped short at what he saw.

Chase Young was in his beast form; a hideous dragon-like, human-like creature. His large, boxy head with its leathery fringe was curled around to face the young man with the brilliant white skin who reclined against his scaly-hided side. Chase and Jack were curled together on a mat on the far side of Spicer’s lab, resting together.

Jack’s eyes were half-closed and he was making a low, pleased sound as Chase’s long, pointed tongue licked slowly over his face.

Ed shuddered and gagged. The thought of beast-spit on his face grossed him out, and he was thankful that it was _Spicer_ who was being licked, not him. Not that there was any _reason_ for Young to be licking _him_ , but Ed was grateful that it wasn’t happening all the same.

As he watched the two of them, stepping behind a bank of metal with blinking lights on it that he didn’t understand, Ed found himself highly confused.

_I can understand wanting Young to touch him when the evil bastard is in his human form,_ thought the young alchemist. _But, what I don’t get is why that dumb noodle looks so **in** love when it’s the **dragon** form touching him!_

Jack Spicer _did_ look like a man in love. He was supported by his lover’s demonic form. He leaned subtly into every stroke of Chase’s tongue and his hands stroked lovingly over the long, massive tail, and a scaly shoulder and arm.

“Ed,” said Roy’s voice quietly from behind him, and the younger alchemist nearly screamed out loud.

“Stop trying to kill me!” he wheezed at Roy in a near whisper.

Mustang was staring over Ed’s head at the entwined couple on the mat. “Ed… come. Let’s leave them alone for now.”

“But, I want to—“

“Ed. Stop being so selfish. Let them have their alone time!” Roy growled, and he took hold of his subordinate’s arm and began tugging.

“They have the rest of their lives to cuddle!” snapped Ed. “Who knows _when_ I’ll get a chance to use a computer again?”

“It will be considerably _longer_ than you wish if you do not get out and grant us privacy,” snarled a dragonish voice.

The alchemists looked over and saw that two sets of eyes – one gold, one red – were glaring at them balefully.

“Terribly sorry,” said Roy, using his most charming voice. “We’re leaving now. We’ll go… throw yarn balls for the cats, or something.”

“You do that,” hissed Chase, who had moved so that he was partially blocking their view of Jack.

Ed muttered and grumbled the whole way, but allowed Roy to drag him out of the lab.

Chase made a low whumph of sound as he shifted again to curl around Jack.

Jack grinned and nuzzled against the dragonish face. “My hero.”

“Hmmph. I wish to spend time with my lover. If I cannot make love to you, then at the very least, I will curl up with you.”

The albino youth smirked. Chase would never call it ‘cuddling’, even though that’s what it was. He stroked the scaly skin and nuzzled again, humming quietly.

“I’m okay with that,” he said, and nuzzled again.

Chase made a rough sound that vaguely resembled a purr and snuzzled back, feeling himself calm down tremendously.

There was nothing quite like having his beautiful lover adore and appreciate him to make him feel better instantly. 

 

*~*~*~*

 

Much later, Chase and Jack finally reappeared.

Roy and Edward had been sitting in one of the mountain palace’s parlors, reading through the books that had caught their eyes. Ed, of course, had gone for the informational, scientific tomes while Roy had chosen a fictional story.

When the Heylin men appeared, Roy had to force Ed out of his reading-trance, and grinned at the mulish look of annoyance he was graced with.

“Oh,” said Ed when he saw Chase and Jack standing nearby. “Finally.”

Chase lifted an eyebrow while Jack snorted disdainfully.

“Hey! All I wanted was to find out about that net-thingy Mustang was telling me about. _You two_ are the ones who just _had_ to do your gross animal-on-human thing at the time!” Ed retorted.

“’Gross’?” echoed the Heylin men; neither of them amused.

Roy held up his hand. “While we know the two of you are bonded together emotionally, it is disconcerting for us to see a human willingly bedding down with a dragon.”

“How very fortunate it is, then, that neither of you has any authority to do something about your judgment of us,” said Chase with a cold smile. “However, that isn’t what I wanted to speak to you about. In two days’ time, I will wish to meet with the both of you about something important. Before then, however, you have time to do as you like. Would you care to venture outside of the palace and see some of our world?” 

Roy and Ed glanced at each other. They’d already been introduced to what Jack called “TeeVee” and the glimpses they’d had of what the world was like thus far were slightly unnerving.

“Thank you,” said Roy a few moments later when it became clear that Ed was waiting for him to make the decision, “but I think we’re going to be fine here.”

“Yeah,” said Ed. “We’ve got books to pass the time. I’m going through the stuff your world has compiled about alchemy while Roy reads…” He paused, checked the cover, and frowned. “What is that?”

Mustang held up the book he was reading and showed the cover, which read: _Stranger in a Strange Land_.

“You have a sick sense of humor,” Ed commented immediately. “No way is that about alchemy.”

“It isn’t,” agreed the colonel with a smile. “It’s about—“

“Do I need to know? All I know is that it isn’t about alchemy or science or anything factual!”

“Edward, there is more to life than alchemy.”

Chase and Jack exchanged amused glances when Elric gave Mustang a look that clearly let everyone know Ed believed Roy to be out of his mind.

“I don’t even know you anymore,” Ed muttered, and hunched back into his seat on the luxuriously cushioned sofa.

Chase shook his head. “I see, now, that it was a mistake to shorten your hair.”

The two alchemists looked up, confused.

“You look even more like a child; this disturbs me,” said the dragon-lord, and he held out his hand, curled his fingers, and snapped.

Ed leapt up with a squawk of outrage and concern as he felt his scalp tingle and his hair start to writhe.

Even as he put his hands up to his head, his blond hair extended until it had reached its former length.

Roy, also on his feet now, gaped at the sudden wealth of gold hair for a moment before looking at Chase, who remained unchanged.

“I suppose we have more proof now,” he said as he reached out to touch Ed’s hair, “that his power is not alchemy, but actual _magic_.”

“Yeah,” said Ed lowly, too relieved at having his hair back to say anything else.

“If that is all,” said Chase, “I will leave you be for now.”

He walked out, his hand sliding over Jack’s shoulder and down his back, and was gone.

Jack turned to look at the two alchemists.

“So… Internet?”

 

*~*~*~*

 

Ed stared at one of the tigers lying in the lab.

The tiger stared back with what he _swore_ was a smirk.

"So, uh... You got a kitchen in this place? 'Cause I'm—“ His stomach interrupted with evidence of his hunger.

The tiger snorted and closed its eyes for a moment, before heaving itself up onto its feet and plodding off down the hall.

Ed stared after it with a frown, which only deepened when the tiger looked over its shoulder and made a sound that _clearly_ meant "Don't stand there all day, idiot!"

"I'm not _stupid_ , furball!" he snapped as he caught up with it, and did his level best to ignore the fact that the tiger's spine-ridge came up to his armpits. "I just don't speak Fuzzbag-ese."

The tiger rumbled, deep and low in its chest, and continued on.

Ed had spent the day holed up in Jack’s lab, learning how to use the Internet to search for information. Some of the things he’d found when using a “search engine” had quickly taught him how to ask specifically for things unless he wanted to stare at a great many naked females doing unwholesome things.

He had the sneaking suspicion that Mustang had already discovered this facet earlier, and _that_ was why the bastard was so wound up excited about it.

“Be just like him,” growled the blond alchemist.

Still, he’d had a productive day. He’d learned how to use a computer, a writing program, the Internet, and a printer to compile all the information he wanted to take with him.

Jack had given him a list of things to search for and compile, saying that if the information had to be retrieved and downloaded anyway, then the guy who’d be using it should have a hand in it. Then, he’d wandered off to take care of something, and Ed hadn’t seen him since.

“Must be nice to be a lazy jerk,” said Elric to himself, smirking slightly.

The tiger leading him flicked its ears and tail, but didn’t react beyond that.

Eventually, Ed found himself led into a spacious kitchen, and he nodded with a wide grin, his eyes slightly narrowed; the expression on his face what Al had taken to calling his "Evil Mastermind" face.

"Now, _this_ is what I'm talking about," he said, satisfied.

" _What_ are you talking about?" queried Jack as he stepped out of a small room, carrying two bottles in his hands.

Ed frowned at the sight of the tall, albino teenager. "Nothin' that concerns you."

Jack shrugged. "Suit yourself." When Ed's stomach rumbled loudly, he smirked and said, "There's fresh food in the refrigerator—“ He pointed to the large mechanical device humming quietly against one wall; "—and there's dry goods in the pantry." He pointed to the room he'd just exited.

"Doesn't look all that dry to me," Ed snarked, but he headed over to the fridge and looked inside. A few moments later, he pulled out a platter of what appeared to be miniature fried chicken drumsticks, only colored a bright red.

"Weirdest looking fried chicken I've ever seen," muttered Ed.

Jack looked over... and then, quickly looked away again to hide his wicked grin. Calmly, he began pouring rum, Code Red Mountain Dew, and orange juice into the blender before him.

"If nobody ever ate because something looked weird to them, we'd have all starved a long time ago," he said reasonably, and was proud that his voice didn't quiver. "I mean, when you think about it, the guy that first looked at a cow and thought to take whatever came out of its udder when he squeezed _must have been desperate—“_

Ed made a loud, revolted noise like he was barfing up four feet of long intestine. When Jack looked over at him, amazed, Ed glared back at him and growled, "D'you _mind?_ Tryin' to _eat_ , here!"

"Sorry," Jack said, in a patently false tone. "Never would've thought you had something against cows, considering the _three_ steaks you packed away at dinner."

"Don't be stupid!" Ed retorted. "It ain't _cows_ – it's what's inside of 'em!"

Jack flicked the blender on and aimed a mean grin at the smaller teen. "Oh... you mean mi—?“

"Don't!" Ed bellowed, and decided to prove the conversation was ended by rapidly shredding and chewing three of the bright-red chicken legs in a row.

Jack grinned widely, turned the blender off, poured a glass full of the orange-pink concoction, and waited.

He didn't have long to wait.

Ed's eyes widened and watered. His mouth dropped open as he began to pant roughly. Sweat popped out on his skin and he fanned himself rapidly... and then, made a sound of pain as the heat intensified in his mouth.

"You okay?" Jack asked with fake concern. "You sound—“

Ed lunged for the glass Jack was holding and quickly drained its contents.

Jack grinned and wondered how it was that the alcohol hadn't lit on fire from touching the residue of wasabi-based hot sauce inside Elric's mouth.

Gasping roughly, Ed stood hunched over, his hands braced on his knees, and tried to stop crying and snotting all over himself as his sinuses drained out of his head.

He accepted the damp paper towels Jack handed him with alacrity and cleaned himself up. When he was done, he squinted through his still-watery eyes and growled, "You could o' _warned_ me!"

"Where's the fun in that?" retorted Jack, who was watching Ed intently.

"What? What are you lookin' at me like—“ Ed began, and when he started to walk forward, ready to fight, he found himself listing sideways – and listing and listing – until he was smushed up against the countertop on the far side of the kitchen.

He blinked owlishly at Jack, who was grinning hugely now. "Wha' jus' hoppin – hypon – ‘curred?"

Jack began laughing. "You chugged down my Orange Cock Sucker drink like it was plain water."

Ed's eyes widened dramatically. "I DRANK COCK?!"

Jack fell on the floor, he was laughing so hard.

"Ya JERK!" Ed howled, and fell forward with a splat when he tried to stalk towards the laughing albino man.

"Sorry – sorry—“ Jack choked out, but he really wasn't, and he couldn't stop laughing.

There came the sound of a sloppy clap, a bright flash of light, and the tile flooring being torn and reformed. Jack quickly sat up and braced his back against the lower cabinets, ready for an attack—

He couldn't see Ed's head, only the splayed body. Directly in the line of sight towards Ed's head was a giant fist raised from the floor, with one single finger lifted in Jack's general direction.

Jack lost it again and was back down on the floor, laughing hysterically.

 

*~*~*

 

"Mustang."

Roy looked up from the book he'd been reading; something called “The Lord of the Rings” and it was _fascinating_. How such richly detailed fantasy could come from one person, he didn’t know, but he wished that his world had a J. R. R. Tolkien. However, seeing the dragon-lord standing in the doorway of the parlor, he set the book aside and gave the man his full attention.

"Yes, Chase, what can I do for you?" he inquired pleasantly.

Chase smirked at him; a smile full of sharp teeth. "You should know better than to greet one such as me with a phrase like that. For now, I need you to come with me. There's been an... incident."

Roy stood up immediately with a frown. "Ed didn't start a fight, did he?"

Chase shook his head and the two men walked down the hallway together.

"No, Edward didn't start a fight," murmured Chase, and a grin broke free across his face. "He got _drunk_."

Roy's eyes widened in disbelief.

Several moments later, he was staring in amazement at Jack and Ed sitting companionably on the floor, swaying back and forth as they sang in harmony and off-key:

_"It’s all for me grog, me jolly jolly grog / It’s all gone for beer and tobacco! / Well, I spent all me tin on the lassies drinking gin / And across the western ocean I must wander!"_

"So far as I know," Chase murmured in Roy's ear, "Jack isn't drunk; he's just _helping_."

_“Where is me bed, me noggy noggy bed? / It’s all gone for beer and tobacco! / I loant it to a whore and now it’s all a-wore / And the springs are looking out for better weather!”_

Roy continued to gape as he watched Ed grin as he howled about whores.

"I had no idea he even _knew_ drinking songs," Roy said as the two teenagers continued to stumble their way through the lyrics.

"Ah... I suspect that's Jack's 'helping'," said Chase, and he looked highly amused.

Just then, Ed noticed his commanding officer standing in the kitchen. He broke off, leaving Jack to continue the song on his own, and waved a glass of orange-pink liquid that sloshed over the rim.

"Cap’n Spanky!" he screeched, and wobbled up onto his knees, and then collapsed across Jack, who helpfully pushed him off.

" _ **Captain** WHAT?_ " Roy bellowed.

"Wull..." grumbled Ed. He rolled onto his back and began pushing himself across the floor by digging in with his heels. "Y' alwaysh look like yer gonna shpank me ev'ry time y' get my reporrrrrrits, sho..."

Roy watched as Ed scooted across the floor to him, the drunk teenager's aim unerring, even in his inebriated state of being.

"Ed... what _possessed_ you to get _plastered?_ " Mustang roared at the top of his lungs.

"'M right down 'ere, Shpankster... no needa shout," Ed groused, and he flopped his head onto Roy's left boot to use it as a pillow.

"Are you out of what's _left_ of your mind?" he yelled anyway as Chase walked past the two of them to go talk with Jack.

"Mmmm... Maybe?" agreed Ed, squinting one eye closed and rattling his automail hand in a vague gesture.

Roy ran his fingers through his hair, annoyed and frustrated all at once. "Fullmetal... You are going to be _miserable_ when this wears off!"

"'Cause I don't drink?"

"Because I'm going to _make_ you miserable!"

"Awwww... thash no fun! Whyn'tcha jush shpank me inshtead? Then we'll both have fun!"

Roy's eyes widened again. _Did he just...?_

The point was moot, however, as Ed chose that moment to roll over, vomit all over Roy's right boot, and pass out.

"Oh, _ew_ ," groaned Roy, grimacing in distaste.

Jack collapsed against Chase and _laughed_.

 

*~*~*

 

Ed was laughing like a loon as he was yanked out from beneath the freezing cold shower spray.

Roy Mustang, however, was not amused.

“What in hell possessed you to get drunk?” he snarled, and shoved Ed back under the spray, keeping a tight grip on the collar of the younger man’s black jacket.

After a count of fifteen, he pulled Ed out from beneath the spray again.

Elric was sputtering, giggling, and hiccupping as he tried to swat and swipe the water away from his face. Roy kept him from breaking his own nose with his automail hand just in time.

“Why did you get _drunk?_ ” growled Roy.

“Seem’t like a good ‘dea at th’ time!” chortled Ed. “I mean… I di’n’t _plan_ t’ get drunk… jus’ hop… hip…? ‘Curred.”

Roy rolled his eyes and shoved Fullmetal back under the spray.

When Ed came back out, he was shivering, and he said, “No! Hey! Wasn’t like that! Swear! Jus’… m’ mouth was on _fire_ an’ Jackie had th’… um… fluid stuff… starts with a Q…?”

Roy sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose with one hand while holding Ed upright with the other. “Liquid?”

Ed beamed at him. “Tha’s it!”

“You bean-brained, bubble-headed, pint-sized—“

“Hey!”

“Ed, I swear to God, if you complain about me calling you—“

“THAT WASN’T NO B-WORD!” yelled Elric at the top of his lungs.

Roy blinked at him.

“Pint-sized ain’t a b-word,” said Ed matter-of-factly.

Then, he slumped down into the tub as he once again lost consciousness. Unable to hold him up, all Mustang could do was gentle his descent.

Sighing, Roy left the slumped over youth in the tub and went to sit on the toilet for a few moments.

Putting his face in his hands, bracing his elbows on his knees, Roy laughed himself breathless.

 

*~*~*~*

 

“Why’d I do it?” Ed groaned.

“Stop _mooing_ , Fullmetal. You did it to yourself, now you can deal with it,” snapped Roy. “Do _what?_ ”

“I don’t… I think I got dared. You know me, Mustang – can’t resist a challenge.”

Roy snorted. “I know you alright, Fullmetal.”

“So… a dare. Yeah. I think I had to drink a whole bucket of kerosene and transmute it into acid. _Inside_.” Just the thought of it made Ed queasy enough to lean over the toilet and vomit.

Mustang grimaced and turned his face away as he pulled the washcloth from the back of Ed’s neck and ran it under the faucet again. When the retching stopped, he slapped a newly cold, wet cloth on the back of Ed’s neck and watched the thin shoulders flinch and shiver.

“What you _did_ was get falling down drunk,” said Roy. “You sang disgraceful songs that would have earned you a slap from any little old white-haired grandma, propositioned me in front of Chase and Jack, and then threw up on my boot before passing out, also in front of Chase and Jack.”

Ed groaned again and began whacking his forehead on the seat of the toilet repeatedly.

“Great; hung-over _and_ concussed – just what we need,” groused Roy, and he pulled Ed away from the toilet.

“No – really – just wanna die,” Ed argued feebly, reaching for the toilet.

“No-can-do, Boozehound,” said Roy with a subtly mean grin. “It’s a rite of passage, your first hang-over. Now, had you let _me_ be the one to get you drunk, I would have ensured a less savage result of indulging in alcohol. However, you made your bed, now you lie in it.”

“I ain’t lyin’ in that thing,” Ed growled, and curled up on the floor. “It’s covered in unspeakable things.”

“Which means you shouldn’t get so drunk you lose control of your bodily functions in the night.”

“Please just shut up, now.”

Roy snorted mirthlessly. “Lucky for you, Chase sent up hang-over remedy; a very lovely tea.”

Ed whimpered as his stomach threw a hissy fit at the thought of letting anything else in to room and board for a while.

“It’d be more humane to let Gluttony sit on my head,” he whined.

“Hmph. If you’re hoping for brain damage, then I’ll have to drop him from a five-story building – directly onto your _ass_ since that’s where your brains are apparently kept.”

“I hate you,” came the pitiful warble from the floor.

“Smooch to you, too, pee-wee,” muttered Roy as he walked out of the bathroom.

Immediately, Ed lunged up from the floor, suffused with rage.

Immediately after that, he crashed back down to the floor, moaning in agony.

“Remind me… t’ kick yer ass… later!” Ed snapped through the ferocious pounding of his aching head. “When I’m feelin’ less… dead-ish.”

Roy rolled his eyes as he poured a cup of the hang-over cure tea.

“The things I do for love,” he said softly to himself, and went back into the bathroom with the cup.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Much, much later, the four of them were seated around the dining table, eating lunch together.

Although Ed merely picked at his bland meal of unflavored rice, unbuttered toast, and water.

Every once in a while, he shot a foul-tempered glare at Jack, who ate his hot, juicy steak with relish while drinking some sugary, carbonated dark liquid that Ed couldn’t remember the name of.

The four of them talked about various things – mainly yet more comparison of Earth versus Amestris – and Ed endured a certain amount of ribbing.

Ed winced as he felt a resistant tug in the socket of his shoulder when he reached for his water glass. A skittering twitch of electrical misfiring jolted down his arm to his elbow, and from there to the ends of his metal fingertips, and he watched blue sparks fly from the steel digits.

"Oh, hell..." he grumbled, flexed, and winced again. "I wish Winry was here."

"Who is 'Winry'?" asked Chase with a raised eyebrow, pausing in the act of sipping his Lao Mang Lone soup.

"She's Ed's automail mechanic," replied Roy from Ed's right. "She's the one who built and maintains his limbs."

Jack peered across the table at Ed's metal hand. "Neurological interface with your nerve endings?"

Ed and Roy glanced at each other – Ed's gaze a bit peeved at the colonel for answering for him – and then looked back at Jack.

A slow nod of the blond head. "Yeah... I suppose so. Depending on what 'neurological' means."

"Your brain is what interprets the information sent back by your nerves and allows you to respond accordingly—“

"Yeah, yeah – tell me something I don't know!"

Jack smirked. "We call that a neurological process in this world. To have a neurological interface means your brain can intercept and translate stimuli sent from extensions of your body so long as your nerve endings are in contact with it."

Roy covered his mouth with one hand so Ed couldn't see him grinning.

Ed elbowed the older alchemist in the side. He knew Mustang was having a laugh at his expense, and he _hated_ it!

Roy gave a muffled grunt and an annoyed look, and ignored Ed for the next few minutes.

"Yeah, it's an interface," groused Edward, glaring at Jack who wasn't doing a thing to hide his amusement. "Why? You think you know somethin' about it?"

"I can build fully-functional robots with their own distinct personalities and intelligence; I hardly think one prosthesis is going to be a difficulty," sneered Jack. "And it sounds like you need a mechanic sooner rather than later if all that creaking and whirring is coming from your arm."

The "instead of your head" was left off, but implied, and Ed bared his teeth in a snarl.

"No mayhem at the dinner table," said Chase calmly.

"As you say, Chase," agreed Jack pleasantly, and continued to grin at Ed.

"Ed, if you can't behave yourself, you'll have to eat at the children's table," muttered Roy under his breath.

"I'd like to see you try and make me!" Ed snapped back.

Roy had a brief mental image of himself trying to subdue Ed – only it turned into something else altogether and Roy coughed once before turning his attention to Jack.

"You can maintenance the automail, Jack?" he asked with a charming grin.

Nobody missed the narrowing of Chase's gold eyes, but Jack simply nodded even as he placed his hand on Chase's right thigh under the cover of the table.

"I can do it," he said. "Just say when."

Roy's smile gained a tiny bit more of warmth. "How about a couple of hours after lunch? That way, if there's any complications, there won't be that much for Ed to bring up."

Jack grimaced as he got the gist of it. Ed gave Roy a fulminating glare.

Chase said nothing, but he kept his gaze on Mustang...

...and his hand on Jack's.

 

*~*~*

 

"Are you _crazy?_ " Ed hissed as he and Roy walked down a hallway; following one of the two tigers escorting them towards Jack's lab. "Telling _me_ to play nice at the table, but then you go and taunt the demon-beast that's sitting right there by flirting with its boyfriend!"

Roy smirked. "It was perfectly harmless, Fullmetal. Spicer isn't about to give up power such as Young's for a 'mere' alchemist – even if I am the _Flame_ Alchemist."

"More like the _Windbag_ Alchemist," snapped Ed, "since you're so full of hot air!"

"At least I'm still hot," said Roy smoothly.

Ed opened his mouth to say something, but something seemed to stick in his throat. He looked at Roy for a moment or two, and then flicked his gaze away without saying anything.

The colonel raised an eyebrow. "Cat got your tongue, Fullmetal?"

The tiger behind them gave a low, rumbling cough that sounded like a chuckle of laughter.

Ed snorted. "Very funny. It's just _dry_ in here."

"Yeah, well, please don't lubricate yourself by getting into the booze again," muttered Roy, and then it was 'too dry' for him as a naughty image filtered into his mind that he quickly shut away.

Ed just _stared_ at Roy and couldn't think of a thing to say to that.

Several minutes later, they finally reached Jack's mechanics lab, which was located in a remote section of the mountain.

They looked around as they entered, noting the machines – both large and small – and what looked to be every conceivable tool in the universe, plus a few nobody else knew about.

"Looks like Winry's idea of heaven," snarked Ed. Then, he looked at Jack, who was waiting for them by a reclining chair situated on a hydraulic lift. "Why do you have a lab _here?_ Why do you have so many labs, anyway? This isn't your real residence, right? I heard you say something about—“

Jack waved his hand nonchalantly. "So far as I'm concerned, this _is_ my real home. It's where I want to be. Anywhere else is a current obligation to hang my hat there."

"Yeah, but—“

"As for the lab being here, Chase knows that sometimes, I get an idea for a new invention and feel the need to get started right away. Since he generally doesn't want me bolting in and out of his mountain on short-notice, the solution was to build me a mechanics lab here. It works."

Ed snorted. "Must be nice to have a sugar daddy."

"You oughtta know: Yours is standing right there," replied Jack as he pointed in Roy's general direction.

Two sets of eyes widened in horrified outrage.

"HE IS NOT!" Ed bellowed at the same time Roy shouted, "I most certainly am _not!_ "

"Really?" Jack smirked. "Older man greasin' the way for the loli-shota to run around getting all hot and sweaty and doing the dirty work. Sounds like it to me."

Roy facepalmed. "You don't have to make it sound so _sleazy_."

Ed's face crashed into a brutal expression of fury. His fists clenched, his antenna quivered, and his eyes narrowed down to tiny slits.

" _What_ did you call me?"

Jack smirked. "Relax; it's a term in the sense of aesthetics, meaning 'pretty boy'."

"Why, you—!“

Ed clapped his hands together, hard, and moved to stretch a spike out of his arm—

—only to give a strangled gurgle and freeze as a loud, grating sound of distressed metal filled the air and blue sparks snapped through his clothing to fill the air.

Roy's eyes widened as he turned to steady his young companion.

"Easy there, Fullmetal," he said, and grinned. "As amusing as it is to see you throwing a tantrum over being called 'pretty', I don't think you're doing yourself any favors."

"It _isn't_ that he called me 'pretty' – which is going to give me _nightmares_ , thanks much! – it's that he said it in such a way to make it seem _dirty!_ " Ed yelled through clenched teeth.

Roy shook his head. "How did you say all that without separating your jaws even once?"

"I think yelling is his _real_ natural talent," opined Jack. "When you have talent, you have versatility, most times."

"True," agreed Roy, and he began coaxing Ed towards the chair. "Nobody yells quite like Edward."

"I hope you both bloat up and die of a horrible illness," the younger alchemist hissed meanly.

"See? He just yelled without even raising his voice," said Roy, somewhat proudly. "You're quite right, Jack – my Ed has talent."

Jack grinned and moved to collect some tools.

Roy looked down, intending to tease, and stopped at the look on the blond youth's face. "...Ed?"

Fullmetal swallowed roughly. " _Your_ Ed?"

Roy said nothing, but he couldn't resist the chance to reach out and ruffle the blond hair with a heavy, lingering touch, and then moved aside as Jack approached.

"Could you two have your tender moment somewhere _other_ than my lab?" the albino youth teased. "Lots of delicate equipment in here. Sparks flying around would be a no-no."

"We are _not_ —“ Ed began, but at the look on Jack's face, he huffed out a breath and slumped back in the chair. "Oh, shut up."

"Nice way to talk to the guy who's going to patch you back together, Frankenstein," retorted Jack, but without any heat.

Roy helped Ed get out of his black jacket and then Ed settled back again.

Jack tucked micro-goggles down over his eyes and began tinkering by unscrewing the cover plates that protected the inner-workings of Ed's arm.

When he pulled them off, he frowned. "Why is this stuff so heavy?"

"It's lighter than it was," Ed replied quietly. "Winry hooked up with a master automail mechanic and he taught her how to blend alloys so it'd be lighter-weight but more durable."

"And it's still grossly heavy. I've got plenty of material here; I'm going to machine you some new coverings and what-not _and_ send the formula for better alloy mixes back with you. That way, your mechanic can do a _real job on you, instead of a patch one."_

Ed glared. "Winry does a _great_ job!"

"Sure – for a primitive mechanic."

Roy frowned. "That's hardly fair, Jack. Our universe lags behind yours by several decades, but we're not any slower on developing anything than your timeline was. I asked Chase about it, if you want further proof."

Jack shrugged. "I consider most of my supposed 'peers' in _this_ world to be primitive, too. They're still kicking about anti-gravity units as theoretical physics, and I've been capable of building them since I was six."

Ed rolled his eyes. "How nice for you. Kudos all around. Gold star, even."

Jack reached in, grabbed a wire, and _yanked_.

Ed's arm knifed upwards and he found himself staring at his own middle finger.

Roy braced himself against the edge of a nearby worktable and _laughed_.

Ed lunged, his mouth gaping open. His teeth snapped together on thin air where Jack's throat had been only a moment before.

"Easy, Cujo," sneered Jack. "No need to get your panties in a bunch."

"I don't know who the hell Cujo is, but don't you _ever_ tweak my nerves like that again!" snarled Ed. "I will kick your butt up between your shoulder-blades so hard you'll have to drop your trousers just to say hello!"

Jack laughed. "Yuh-huh. Whatever you say, Goldilocks. Speaking of getting butts kicked around, looks like Chase did a number on yours when you guys sparred. The rim around your ball-bearing socket is crumpled inward and is creating a dragging friction dangerously close to the nerve cluster."

Ed gaped, and then twisted so he could take a look, while Roy edged around to get a look at it himself. They both winced.

"I never even felt it!" Ed exclaimed.

Jack's smile was hugely smug.

"What is it with you and the damned smirks?!" Ed yowled.

"Oh, settle down, Sunflower – I just happen to know that Chase is _that_ good at what he does," replied Jack.

" _Sunflow—“ began Ed, but Roy clapped his hand over the younger alchemist's mouth, because Jack was still speaking._

"The problem we're looking at here is that in order to put everything back the way it's supposed to be, I can't _get_ at it while your arm is there. It's going to have to come off which is fine, because that means I can machine new parts."

Ed and Roy both gave each other wary glances.

"I'm not so sure that's a good idea," Roy began diplomatically, but Jack rolled his eyes.

"Chase would string me up by my own intestines if I do anything to seriously damage either one of you without his permission in his home," said the albino genius. "You asked me to fix it; I can do that. All you gotta do is decide: yes or no."

The two alchemists looked at each other in silent communication.

Eventually, Roy eased back and Ed nodded reluctantly at Jack. "Okay... do it."

Jack waited and watched as Ed disconnected the arm. He quickly took it away and went to another part of the lab, leaving Roy to comfort the sweat-damp, shivering alchemist.

Roy fished a handkerchief out of his pocket and began cleaning Ed's face. He winced when gold eyes looked up at him, ragged and full of pain.

"You know, Edward... I really hate seeing you hurting like this," he confessed abruptly.

Ed's eyes widened. Uncomfortable, he glanced away.

"Yeah, well... don't look if it bothers you," he grumbled.

"Don't be stupid, Ed," muttered Roy, and he took off his heavy jacket and covered the younger alchemist with it since Ed continued to shiver.

"Jack," he called over, and the red head lifted and turned towards him. "When will you be done?"

"In a few hours, but the reconnection should probably wait longer," replied Jack. "You might as well haul him upstairs and tuck him into bed; let him sleep it off."

"Alright, so when are you going to give him back his arm?"

"How about tomorrow morning? And ask one of the cats to get him an ice-pack to help cool the fever he's probably going to have from the disconnection. Anytime nerves get messed with, fever results."

"Yes... he's been through this before," said Roy.

"Stop _talking_ about me like I'm not even here!" snarled Ed.

"Then don't _be_ here! Buzz off, Bumblebee; go take a nap somewhere."

Ed's natural instinct was to flip Jack off, yet again, but he groaned softly as his body failed to lift an arm that wasn't there, and his nerves protested.

"You _would_ have to goad me when I'm armless," he muttered.

"I'll give you back the opportunity to flex your so-called muscles tomorrow, Chuckles. Get on out of here," said Jack, and he was already bent back to the automail arm; picking it apart and examining the workings of it.

"C'mon, Fullmetal – there's no point in arguing with the guy who's fixing your arm," said Roy, and he helped Ed to sit up, and then climb down off the chair.

Ed swayed woozily and automatically tried to give back the jacket, blinking up at Roy silently.

Roy grinned and shook his head. "No – keep it, you're still shivering."

"Fuckin' knew that," grumped Ed, but he didn't say a word when Roy's arm went around him and steadied him as he walked out of the lab.

By the time they made it back to their room with their tiger escorts, Ed was all but asleep on his feet. He was stumbling, his head hanging down, and Roy could feel the heat of Ed's skin even through their clothing.

"He needs that ice-pack," he said out loud, and heard the heavy tread of one of the cats turning and walking away.

Fumbling the door open one-handed, Roy then dragged Ed inside and got him down onto one of the beds inside the room Chase had leant them to rest in. Quickly, Mustang stripped Edward down to his boxers and ducked into the small, private bath attached to their room. He returned with a wet washcloth and began mopping Ed's skin with it, hoping to ease some of the heat washing off the young alchemist who lay, limp and sprawled, on the mattress.

Roy sighed. "You always get yourself into a mess," he said quietly.

Gold eyes opened a bit and looked up at him. To Roy's surprise, a slight smile curved Ed's mouth, and then the blond teenager slipped into sleep.

The door opened and a tiger came padding in with a bottle-bag filled with ice cubes.

"Thanks," Roy grunted, and he settled the bag so that it draped over the majority of Ed's right shoulder.

Ed's body gave a massive shiver as a result, but his skin was still overheating, so Roy didn't remove it.

Nearly an hour later, Ed's temperature had evened out enough so that, despite still being warmer-than-average, his skin wasn't dangerously hot. Keeping the bottle-bag where it was, Roy covered Ed with the sheet and blankets.

Turning Ed's head to the side, he carefully unraveled the braid and settled the hair-tie around Ed's left wrist, stroked the blond hair back from Ed's brow, and finally went to take his own rest.

 

*~*~*

 

When Ed had climbed into his bed, he didn't know.

He didn't really _care_ too much, either – he didn't have the _time_ , because he was pretty sure the top of his head was going to blow off if the suction got much stronger.

His right hand was tangled in bright blond hair and the muscles in his arm corded and relaxed with the motion of Edward's head. His dick, happy with the attention, was sending pulses of ecstasy to slam, fireball-hot, up his spine to detonate in his brain.

Roy's back arched slightly and he gasped, struggling to keep control of himself. He refused to look down, because he knew if he did – knew if he looked at Ed's mouth wrapped around him – he'd _lose_ it, and he didn't want to lose it.

Not yet.

He shuddered, hard; jolting the bed when Ed curled and flicked his tongue _just so_ , and that was it.

"Edward...!" he growled, and he used his grip on the younger alchemist's hair to _pull_ Ed away from his cock and further up the bed.

He rolled, pinning Ed down, and kissed into the fiery teenager's mouth. Given where that mouth had just been, he'd have thought Ed would taste like _him_ , but no, Ed tasted like the greatest Scotch in the world – burning, smoky, _vivacious_ – and Roy kissed and kissed, trying to get drunk on Ed.

His hand went between Ed's legs, down behind Ed's balls, and he found his target zone. He shuddered again and made a whimpery, growling noise at finding Ed already loose, and wet, and ready for him, and thought that Ed must have prepared himself for this before climbing into his bed.

Desperate – dizzy, drunk, _needing_ – Roy stopped kissing and gulped air. He felt immensely powerful at having Ed in his bed, having Ed beneath him. The great Fullmetal Alchemist was hot and arching up to him and his molten-gold eyes were _begging_ him to do more, do everything, and it was him, Roy Mustang, who was doing this to Fullmetal!

He rolled them again, and Edward was face-down on the bed; his chest braced by the pillows as Roy caught hold of his hips and lifted them, pulling the blond youth up to a better angle.

"Mine," he whispered as he used his knee to forcefully push Ed's legs apart. "Mine... I'm going to be _in_ you...!"

"Roy!" called Ed desperately, and his hips shoved back demandingly.

Roy snarled, deep and low in his chest. He'd never _needed_ like this before; like he was going to _die if he didn't get inside Edward Elric right – this – instant._

He settled closer to Ed, between the trembling blond youth's thighs. Arching back, Roy reached down to guide himself into place; then, taking hold of those sweet, slim hips he'd been fantasizing about for months, he surged forward, pushing his erection inside with a fierce, swift thrust.

He almost passed out at how _good_ being inside Edward felt. So much better than his fantasies; so tight and fever-hot and luscious. This was it, he knew: He was spoiled for anyone else, now. He would never want to be in anyone else but Edward for the rest of his life.

Curling forward, he fitted his front to Ed's back and held on, shivering.

"Edward," he said, and it sounded like a blessing. "Edward... oh, _Ed_..."

Roy was happy. It startled him, because he hadn't been truly _happy_ in a long time. But Edward was here, in his bed, in his _life_ , calling his name in a warm tone he'd never heard before, and tightening around him, and begging him to move in him, and it was just... perfect.

Ed made a plaintive noise and his head turned. Roy jolted in surprised when Ed's mouth opened and latched onto his arm. Hot-wet- _OH_ shock to his skin; a sharp nip of teeth and a sweet curl of tongue, and then Ed _rolled_ his hips in a purely filthy way that damn near gave Roy heart failure.

"Edward...!" He didn't manage anymore than that. Roy lunged upwards and braced himself on his fists to either side of Ed's shoulders; he angled his head and bit down on the back of Ed’s neck in a fierce love-bite that anchored him, gave him stability, and he _moved._

His hips trip-hammered, slamming him in and out of his love at a frantic pace that didn't come anywhere near close to matching the desperation in his soul. The grip around his cock was hot, slick, tight, _wonderful_ , and he would never get _enough_ of it—

He came hard, powerfully, and the sensation of heat and wetness against his own thigh startled him into snorting awake.

Stupidly, he looked down and saw his own fist wrapped tightly around his cock, which was still pulsing in the throes of his orgasm; making the grip slippery-wet and beautiful. Roy gave a great, shuddering gasp and his hips snapped forward once, twice, again... and then, he collapsed down onto his bed, groaning as he landed in the wet spot.

A minute or so later, he forced his groggy mind to put together the facts. He _made_ his lethargic body twist and turn until he could look across to the other bed.

"Oh, thank God," he moaned at the sight of Ed deeply asleep; sprawled in innocent unwariness across his own bed.

Too tired, too sore from his exertions, Roy made the split-second decision to just _stay_ in bed and that he'd clean up tomorrow.

Yawning, he fitted himself around the wet spot, pulled the twisted covers back over himself, and was asleep a few moments later.

 

*~*~*~*

 

The next morning, Ed received his new arm and found himself amazed at how significantly lighter it was – weighing no more than his real arm did.

Then, Jack hit the new arm _hard_ with a crowbar.

Ed leaped back with a yelp and assumed a defensive position, his nerves twanging as the reverberation rattled them. However, thanks to the numbing agent Jack had used, he wasn’t nearly in as much pain as he usually was.

“What the hell was _that_ for?” Elric shouted angrily.

Spicer smirked at him. “Take a look at your arm.”

Warily, Edward did so.

And found the metal unmarked; not so much as a scratch on it.

He looked up at Jack, his eyes wide, even as Roy took hold of his arm and bent for a closer examination.

“I _told_ you: Our alloys are a significantly higher grade than yours. I’ll send the formula back with you, of course, but that is what we call Liquidmetal. Well, that’s the name the company came up with after I anonymously sent the design to them. Anyway! It’s a zirconium-based alloy with 254ksi and an EL-2, so—“

“I don’t know what that means,” interrupted Edward. “I recognize the word ‘zirconium’. That’s all.”

“Hmmm. Alright, let me ask this: You have aluminum, copper, stainless steel…?”

“We have aluminum, copper, and steel – not so much of the ‘stainless’.”

“The ‘stainless’ would be what your pal Winry uses to make your limbs.”

“Oh. Well, then, yeah; we’ve got all those.”

Jack smirked and pointed at Ed’s new arm. “Liquidmetal is 200 times stronger than aluminum and 150 times stronger than stainless steel. In terms of elasticity, it is two percent more elastic than aluminum and stainless steel, and one percent more elastic than copper. The near-net shape processing characteristics and amorphous atomic structure allow for fatigue resistance, yield strength, density, elastic modulus, impact resistance, thermal and electrical conductivity, coefficient of thermal expansion, and acoustic and dampening characteristics.”

Ed’s eyes went bigger with the new information. He glanced at it. “Zirconium-based, you say?” He waited for Jack’s nod. “What else is in it?”

“Copper, nickel, niobium… a little of this, a little of that. Basically, everything that’s in steel, only mixed differently.”

Ed nodded. He took his arm back from Roy, clapped his hands together, and placed the left over the back of the right and pulled.

A spike grew out from the top of his metal hand, moving smoothly and sweetly, until Ed was staring at a foot-long metal spike that gleamed beneath the bright lights of the lab.

“There was hardly any drag,” he said quietly. “Usually, it feels like I’m pulling taffy. There wasn’t any of that.”

Jack pointed to a thick slab of titanium over in one corner. “Thought you might wanna test it out. Go punch that and cut it a few times.”

Ed scowled at the albino man, but nevertheless went over to the waiting slab.

In three seconds, he’d reduced it to perfectly sliced chunks and crumpled bits of metal.

He stared at his arm in awed fascination.

Roy smiled. “I believe Edward’s in love.”

“Shut up,” Ed murmured without looking away from his arm.

Jack snickered and Mustang cracked a smile.

“Yeah, well, all in a day’s work for a robotics genius,” said Jack, stretching slightly. “By the way, I took the liberty of making you a new leg, too. If you want it, let me know.”

Both alchemists stared at him incredulously.

Jack grinned wickedly. “It really isn’t that hard to guess the dimensions.”

Ed and Roy glanced at each other.

Roy nodded slightly.

Ed looked at Jack. “Yeah – new leg.”

Jack lifted an eyebrow and waited.

Baring his teeth, the blond alchemist gritted out, “…Please.”

Spicer grinned. “One leg, coming up.”

 

*~*~*~*

 

Roy stood to the side of the training room, watching Ed practice his martial arts using the new arm and leg. The bright metal of the limbs flash-flashed as Elric moved smoothly, swiftly, through the forms of attack and defense.

Ed had asked him to spar with him, but he’d had to say no.

“I’m sorry, Fullmetal, but I don’t know those combat techniques,” he’d said. “Boxing, I can do. _Snapping_ , I have down pat. Martial arts…? No.”

He’d been surprised at the disappointment in Ed’s face. Of course, the blond alchemist had rallied with a jibe, but Roy knew better – Edward had been disappointed that he couldn’t share something he enjoyed with him.

Now, as he watched the lithe form run, leap… tuck and roll, kick and punch… Roy thought that he was _glad_ he didn’t know martial arts. That left him on the sidelines able to watch, rather than being in the middle of a sparring match.

“Hey.”

Roy glanced over and saw Jack coming into the room. He admired the long legs encased in black; the grace of the albino man’s stride. Just because he’d grown to want short and loud didn’t mean he no longer had an appreciation for tall and quiet.

“Thank you,” he said, gesturing down to where Ed flared and diced with deadly, eloquent grace. “Thank you for that: for making better limbs than he had.”

“Hardly a difficulty,” said Jack, and there was the tone of a master who knows he’s done excellent work in his voice. “He’s pretty good.”

“He was already ‘pretty good’ with his other automail; able to take out squads of soldiers bigger, faster, and stronger than him. He’s even better now with those lighter-weight limbs.”

Jack nodded. “Well, it’s nice to know I’ve made a deadly killing machine even more deadlier.”

“He _isn’t_ a machine,” said Roy quietly, dangerously.

Spicer glanced over at the colonel. After a moment, he nodded.

“Okay. I get what you’re saying. Although, you should know that because I’m a Master of _Robotics_ , I don’t consider ‘machine’ to be an insult.”

Mustang smiled slightly. “Yes, well… If we ever do find the Philosopher’s Stone, Ed might actually have a moment of debate about whether or not to give up the limbs.”

Jack grinned. “Damn, I’m good. Speaking of the Stone, Chase sent me in here to tell you that he’d like you and Ed to come to his throne room in about an hour or so.”

Roy flicked up one eyebrow and turned to face Spicer. “Did he say why?”

“Only that it has something to do with the Philosopher’s Stone.” With that, Jack turned to leave.

“Wait! Does that mean he—?“

“Sorry, can’t help you. I don’t know anything else,” said Jack, waving his hand languidly as he left the room.

With his heart pounding, Roy slowly turned back to watch Ed smash through a ten-slab row of concrete without hesitation.

 

*~*~*~*

 

An hour later, Roy and Ed stood a few feet away from the front of what appeared to be a throne. Although neither had ever heard of a throne being upholstered in pink velvet, before, they didn't let their astonishment show.

Jack stood by Chase's right hand: An honor guard, an attendant, and a consort all in one. He stood with the confidence of a man who had every right to be there; held himself with the poise of a man who knew he was _wanted_ there.

Chase himself sat on his throne in a pose that said he felt _very_ at home on the furniture. A sardonic little smile curled his lips and his gold eyes were heavy and intense with cruelty and cunning and plans only he was privy to.

"So, is there a _reason_ for this, or are you just an army general in disguise who likes to stare at people until they wriggle uncomfortably, too?" growled Ed after a while.

Roy stayed completely still. He already knew that Ed had a short fuse. The only hope for keeping _any_ playing cards in their hands was for _him_ to remain in control.

That sardonic smile curled a little higher on the beautiful Eastern face.

"I have commanded armies in my time," drawled Chase. "That is not what this is about. This is about the Jin Dan Ruby."

Ed tilted his head. "The whobie-whatta?"

"I believe you know it as the Philosopher's Stone."

Both alchemists stiffened; Ed more obviously than Roy, but the Flame was not unaffected.

"It is called the Jin Dan Ruby in this world," Chase went on to say. "A Xiaolin Master Dragon named Hui created it one-hundred or so years after Flamel attempted his experiments in alchemy."

"Oh, how convenient," said Fullmetal dryly. "I wonder how _that_ happened?"

Chase smirked. "I left my copies of Flamel's notes where young Master Hui could find them. She was a curious woman and, as her name suggested, intelligent and wise. She understood what Flamel had been attempting and accepted the challenge. The result... is this."

From his sash, Chase drew forth a red stone. It was an oblong scarlet crystal; almost long enough to be given the term "wand" or "stick." It was cut so that the crystal had four smooth sides. One end was slightly rounded, while the other tapered into an obvious point.

Ed almost stopped breathing. There it was; the very thing he'd been searching so long and so hard for: The Philosopher's Stone.

He knew it was the real thing the same way he knew he was the greatest Alchemist alive in his own world; knew he had the greatest little pain-in-the-ass brother _ever_ ; knew that Roy Mustang was a bastard and always would be, no matter what.

There, nestled against the fabric of Chase Young's dark-olive glove, was the Philosopher's Stone.

His gaze remained fixed on it as he let Roy do all the talking.

"We have only your word that this is the Stone," said Mustang, his jet-black eyes narrowed cunningly. "What does the Jin Dan Ruby do?"

"It transmutes, Colonel Mustang," replied Chase smoothly. "It does so perfectly, without pain or degradation or demand of payment, and whatever gets changed remains that way until someone makes the conscious choice to affect the object again."

"And we should trust that what you say is true because...?"

Young's smile was pure evil. "Whether you do or not is entirely up to you."

"I don't suppose we could have a demonstration?"

"How will that determine that this is the genuine article?"

"An alchemic transmutation lasts for roughly an hour; perhaps a few minutes longer, but only a few. If you were to transmute something with that stone—“

"No," Ed said suddenly. He pointed at Jack. " _He_ has no magic. _He_ performs the transmutation. If it holds for two hours, then we'll know it's the real thing."

Jack lifted an eyebrow. "A reasonable plan."

"Yes," agreed Chase as he looked at Ed. The expression in his gaze had Roy fighting his instinctive urge to put himself between Ed and the predator eyeing him. "But, I don't believe young Elric requires the demonstration. He already knows what this is; already _knows_ , without doubt, that this is the Stone he seeks."

"How do _you_ know?" challenged Ed belligerently.

Chase laughed and said nothing.

Ed's hands curled into fists and he growled.

"If you would like a few moments to discuss it with your commander, I promise no one within my domain will listen in on the conversation," said the dragon-lord.

Ed immediately whirled around and stalked to the far side of the throne room.

Roy sighed softly, and then said "Thank you" to Chase. He waited for the man's gracious nod before turning away; his shoulders and spine stiff against the sensation of enemy eyes watching him go.

"You know it's the real thing," Ed said as soon as he joined the smaller alchemist. "You _know it_ , Mustang!"

"Ed—“

"Look me in the eye and tell me you think it's fake!"

Roy met his subordinate's gaze, held it... and sighed again. "You know I can't."

Smug pleasure wormed its way across Ed's face. "You can feel it the same way I can; the deep-down _right_ that _that's_ the Stone."

The older man nodded once and rubbed the fingertips of his right hand against his temple, trying to will away the migraine attempting to form.

"Yes, I can," he agreed. "The only question is: What do we do about it?"

Ed gaped at him in disbelief. "You already said we'd—“

"I know! This is just a chance for us to..."

"What? Back out? Brainstorm a new plan in three seconds? Just _give in_ to whatever he asks?"

Roy shrugged. "All viable alternatives."

Ed scowled. "Like hell they are. Roy, we're not _stealing_ it; the Philosopher's Stone doesn't _have_ a true 'owner'. It's used by whoever holds it and whoever _wins_ the Stone holds it until it's taken away again. Besides, if it's a Shen-Gong-Whatsit, that means it's an object for contention. A challenge is _allowed."_

Ebony eyes widened briefly, and then narrowed. "Ed... Ed, that's it. God damn it, you _are_ a genius!"

Ed snorted. "You only _just_ noticed? Never mind. What are you—?“ He broke off, his gold eyes widening as he realized what he'd said.

Anyone could challenge for possession of a Shen-Gong-Wu.

_Anyone._

They wouldn't have to launch an unprovoked attack. They could simply challenge the current Keeper of the Stone for right to possession.

Roy would be able to _live_ with himself afterward.

The two of them shared a wide grin; both of them perfectly in accord with one another for one of the rare moments in their shared existences.

Nodding to each other, the two alchemists turned and walked, in perfect step, back to where Chase and Jack waited for them.

"So... what did you decide?" asked Jack calmly.

"It's the real thing," said Ed immediately.

"We both agree on that," added Roy quickly.

Chase smirked. "I thought you might. To that end, I'm prepared to make a deal with you."

"So are _we_ ," interrupted Ed, and his grin was almost as malicious as Young's. "We challenge you to a Xiaolin Showdown for possession of the Jin Dan Ruby."

Chase and Jack glanced at each other with "Well, whaddya know?" expressions.

"They actually figured it out," said Jack with a smirk.

"Yes. I thought they would be foolish enough to simply attack," murmured Chase as he glanced back at the waiting alchemists. "They're not quite as hopeless as I feared."

"Wouldn't us being hopeless make things _easier_ for you?" asked Roy coldly as, beside him, Ed vibrated with suppressed fury.

"I dislike doing battle against hopeless opponents. It's somewhat akin to sand-blasting a soup cracker," came the pithy reply.

"Why, you—!“

Ed took a stiff-legged step forward, but Roy caught him and held him back.

"Wise," said Jack in a snotty tone that made both alchemists' teeth ache with the need to wipe the smirk off his face.

"So, you have challenged me for the Jin Dan Ruby," said Chase slowly. "One of you – and only one of you – may be the contender, as you only have one Shen-Gong-Wu to wager."

"Translated: Decide which one of you goes up against Chase," snarked Jack.

"That's simple," said Roy. "Me."

Chase's pleased smile was frightening. "Excellent."

Ed gave Roy a look that said the older alchemist had better know what he was doing.

"However, I wish to make a side-wager."

Both alchemists looked at the dragon-lord with faces that rapidly paled.

"Like what?" groused Ed.

"Should _you_ win... you leave immediately, leaving behind the information my Jack has compiled for you, taking _only_ your accumulated Shen-Gong-Wu," said Chase, and his voice was cold and firm with authority.

"And if _you_ win...?" prompted Roy, matching the other man tone-for-tone.

"When I win," said Chase smoothly, " _you_ will assume the form of a cat warrior and remain here until such time as your... subordinate... completes his mission in your world and returns to claim you."

Two sets of eyes widened. Elric and Mustang looked at each other, confused, and then back to the dragon-lord.

"Say _what?_ " Ed yelped.

"For my own reasons, which I will not share with you, I have decided that you may – in the event that your leader loses to me – take the Jin Dan Ruby back to your world long enough to allow you to restore your brother's and your own bodies to normal. _Mustang_ will remain here, in the form of one of my cat warriors, until you return the Jin Dan Ruby to me. If you do not return, Colonel Mustang remains as one of my warriors – forever."

Ed snorted. "I get to fix Al and me, and the bastard stays out of my hair for the rest of my life? How is _that_ losing?"

Roy stiffened. He tried not to take it personally; he knew Ed was afraid and this was the younger man's way of lashing out.

But, damn it all, that _hurt_.

"You may have another few minutes to discuss it in private, if you choose," offered Chase.

Ed sneered. "No thanks. We'll just—“ But he glanced up, then, expecting to see Roy in agreement.

Instead, he saw the utter blankness of emotion that Mustang only displayed when he'd been honestly hurt.

_Oh, shit,_ Ed thought quietly.

Turning back to face Chase, he said, "On second thought, hold that thought."

Then, he caught hold of Roy's wrist, spun the man around, and hauled him across to the other side of the room.

"Something you wanted, Fullmetal?" Roy asked him politely, looking at a point over his head.

"Yeah," Ed growled. "I want to apologize."

At that, ebony eyes dropped down to meet his own gaze.

"I didn't... Roy..." He stopped to clear his throat. "Shit, this is hard. Listen... I screwed up when I said that. I'm _sorry_ , okay? I just... I wouldn't really..."

He shivered and looked away, feeling his face heat with a blush.

"I wouldn't leave you," he said quietly. "I swear on _Al's life_ , Roy, I wouldn't ever leave you behind!"

Charcoal eyes flared wide as their owner listened to those amazing words.

Ed Elric would never do anything to jeopardize his younger brother's health and vitality.

Never _ever_.

For him to swear on Alphonse Elric's life....

A warm, soothing sensation easing through him, Roy smiled slightly and reached out to take hold of Ed's face in his hands. He winced when Ed flinched, but gently coaxed the younger man's head up so they could look at each other.

"Thank you," he said when gold eyes warily looked at him. "I know what Al means to you, Edward. Thank you. I accept the apology. I trust you."

Ed let out a shuddering breath and closed his eyes.

Roy smiled again, still, and stroked his gloved thumbs over the younger man's cheeks as gently as he could, being careful of the abrasive material against that smooth skin.

"Are we going to accept his side-wager?" he asked softly.

Ed's eyes opened and he looked up. "I want to. I know that puts you in a bad position – I'll be the one he fights against, if that's too much—“

Roy shifted his right hand so that it covered Ed's mouth, stopping the flow of words.

"No," he said. "I'll fight him. Even if I win, you have the chance to restore Al and yourself. That's good enough."

"But... the homunculi... and the Fuhrership...!"

"I was always planning to take the Fuhrership before you or the homunculi ever entered my awareness," said Roy, and he moved to stroke his fingers up into Ed's bangs, scratching lightly over the younger man's scalp. "I can do that on my own time – with the right people there to help, of course."

He gave Ed a little wink and smile, and was surprised when Ed blushed so fiery red.

Fidgety, suddenly uncomfortable, Fullmetal reached up and smacked Mustang's hands away.

"Alright! Alright, you've made – well – I just don't wanna have to _owe_ you, is all!" the shorter alchemist said, fuming up at the older man.

Roy smirked. "Ed, Ed, Ed... Don't you know that by _now_ you're so far in hock to me that you're not going to be paid up until you're a gray-haired, wrinkled, _littler_ old man?"

" _Fuck_ and _you_ , Mustang!" Fullmetal shouted, blazing with wrath. "I hope he rips out your entrails and makes lace doilies with 'em!"

Turning, he stomped back over to face Chase, who was still sitting on his throne; one large hand hiding his lower face.

Jack wasn't nearly so self-controlled and was gasping desperately for air around yelps of laughter.

Roy was snickering as he slowly moseyed over to join his wayward pet alchemist.

Ed jerked his thumb back over his shoulder. "Okay, it's set! Colonel _Ultimate Bastard_ , there, will fight you _and_ we agree to the side-wager! Now, hurry up and kick his ass before I do it _for_ you!"

Jack lost it. With his arms wrapped around his stomach, he fell over and lay curled up against the throne, laughing uncontrollably.

Chase closed his eyes briefly, needing that moment to maintain his control. Then, slowly, he nodded as he let his hand drop away from his face.

"Very well, then. I suppose you would prefer to do this right now?" he asked, glancing at Roy.

Mustang shrugged. "No reason not to. I got plenty of sleep and I'm quite young and healthy."

A subtle dig, there; poking at the fact that Chase, despite his appearance, was not so young – and that ingesting dragon soup could _not_ be healthy, no matter what.

Chase laughed, low and amused. "Technically, I am still sixteen-years-old," he said as stood up casually, tucking the Jin Dan Ruby into his sash. "I simply have the _experience_ and _power_ of several hundred years."

"You're both egotistical, grandstanding, narcissistic _windbags_ ," Ed growled. "Would you both please shut the hell up and go fight, already?!"

Chase looked with distaste at Edward, and then glanced at Roy with an upraised eyebrow. "He really hasn't any sense of decorum, has he?"

"Not a bit," replied Roy. "Quite frankly, I'm amazed he's lived this long."

"Are you two clowns through jabberin'?" grumped Ed, and he stomped away again.

Chase rolled his eyes briefly. He glanced at Roy. "Do you remember the rules?"

"Yes.”

Jack managed to stop laughing and drag himself up from where he'd slumped beside the throne. Still grinning, he staggered over to Chase, who caught him with a look of wry amusement.

"You are made of awesome," he said, and kissed his lover. Then, reaching into his coat, he pulled out a Shen-Gong-Wu and handed it to the dragon-lord.

Chase took it and looked it over. "The Pearl of Li Bai?"

Jack started snickering again. "Just a thought I had. Please?"

Chase grinned and kissed the younger man. "Very well."

He forcibly turned Jack around and shooed his lover over to the throne. Happily, Jack plopped down on it. It wasn't often that he sat in this chair alone; Chase's consort he might be, but he knew better than to make a motion that implied he was trying to usurp the other man's power. He glanced at Ed, who stood quite a few feet away, and motioned at him.

"You might want to come over here," he called out. "It'll be the safest place – and that's not saying much."

By now, the rank-and-file of Chase's Army of Warriors was beginning to gather around the circular room; intent on watching the spectacle.

Ed sneered. "I can keep myself safe, thanks."

Jack shrugged. "Suit yourself."

Roy looked at the slender silver ring mounted with a large, perfect gray pearl. "That's a Shen-Gong-Wu?"

Chase smiled. "Yes."

Roy waited for an explanation, but it never came. His lips thinned in annoyance. Young was playing it close to the vest, apparently. _He_ would simply have to be very careful.

Roy moved farther out into the room as Chase did the same. Racking his brain to remember the rules the dragon-man had told him, he paused for a brief moment. Then, smirking, he began.

"I wager the Shí Xing Màng!" he called out.

"I wager the Pearl of Li Bai," replied Chase calmly, also smirking. "The contest is thus: Whoever falls down and stays down _loses_."

Roy's eyes narrowed. "To the _death?_ "

Chase shook his head. "You are of no use to me dead. Unconscious will do fine."

"Hah!" called Ed. "More like you're—“

"Be quiet, Fullmetal!" growled Roy. "As of now, you're an observer only!"

Ed recoiled; stung by his commander's causticity.

The Flame Alchemist returned his attention to his opponent. "Agreed."

Chase nodded. "Very well, then: _XIAOLIN SHOWDOWN!_ "

Mustang hadn't been prepared and so didn't join in on the shout. He didn't mind; he wasn't sure his own contribution would have been heard through Young's impressively stentorian roar.

To the alchemists' shock, the room began rearranging itself. Jagged stalactites and stalagmites erupted around them. The floor dipped and warped, creating slanting slopes that added difficulty to the terrain. The throne that Jack was sitting on was pushed high up and backwards, moving the young man out of the way. Ed, too, was lifted high and pushed backwards, and was left standing on a small platform of marble now attached high against a wall.

The two fighters themselves were now in what appeared to be a sunken pit of an obstacle course.

" _Gong Yi Tampai!_ " shouted Chase.

" _What?_ " queried Roy, more than a little confused. None of this had been mentioned!

"Ready-Set-Go," smirked Chase, and then he leaped.

Mustang barely dodged away in time. He hit the floor with his shoulder curved under him, rolling neatly. His butt-skirt flared around him gracefully as he whirled up onto his feet and snapped off a series of small, high-intensity fireballs in Young's direction. The dragon-lord was forced to break off his stride and skitter in the other direction, which gave Roy time to find a better position and entrench himself for defense.

"I _thought_ this was done using the Shen-Gong-Wu!" he growled, trying to discern Chase from the shadows ahead of him. The man had slipped into the forest of stalagmites across from him.

"Certainly you may use yours if you wish," came the reply, and Roy found himself frustrated. There was no clear indication of where the words were coming from, preventing him from launching an attack. "They are the _only_ weapons in use if _specifically_ stated at the beginning of the contest."

"Which they weren't. Which means you may rely upon a vast arsenal of magic in addition to having the home ground advantage!"

"That is the beauty of these little magical games. The terrain has been altered so that we are on a level playing field – metaphorically, if not factually. And you, as you've so _handily_ pointed out, may rely on your own weapons as well."

"True enough," said Roy, and he snapped a flare up high over the stalagmite forest.

The air parted in the wake of the small firebomb with a shrill whistle. As soon as it reached its zenith over the stalagmites, the firebomb exploded and burned with enhanced brightness; feeding on double the amount of hydrogen in the air thanks to Mustang's alterations in the construction of it.

The stalagmites and the ground they were situated on were lit up as if the sun itself was overhead.

But there came no flicker of motion; no tell-tale shadow of anyone hiding.

Roy frowned. Perhaps Chase was further back amongst the stalagmites...?

"Nice try."

Mustang shouted as he was sent flying; a hard strike from behind connecting with his right hip when he turned. It hurt, badly, but even as he flew through the air, he snapped a thin, violent streamer of fire back into Chase Young's face.

An enraged howl rent the air, but Roy didn't stick around to see what he'd accomplished. He hauled himself painfully up onto his feet, and then snapped downwards. Three fireballs exploded into the rock flooring, creating a haze of dust, dirt, and smoke between himself and Chase. With that meager cover available, he gripped the Shen-Gong-Wu tightly in his hand and growled, "Shí Xing Màng!"

He didn't know _where_ Chase Young was – not in terms of measurement. All he knew was that he wanted to be _behind_ the man, and so that was the mental order he gave to the device.

To his shock, it worked.

Chase was already beginning to turn when Roy realized he'd better do something _immediately_.

Dropping the Shí Xing Màng, he held out both fists directly in front of Chase Young, and _snapped_.

The dragon-lord disappeared in a gout of fire.

Roy was shaking, wondering if he'd gone too far. He opened his mouth to call out to Chase.

" _Alone I walk / And pity take / On none but he who walks alone!_ "

Roy shut his mouth _fast_. He went a little cross-eyed, trying to stare down at his own lips.

Up on the wall, Ed gaped as he heard the nonsense spewing from Mustang's mouth.

"What the _hell_ are you doing?!" he screeched from his perch. Across the way, Jack was curled up in the throne again, laughing his damned fool head off. "Now is no time for a _poetry recital!_ "

" _I don't know why I said it / I shouldn't have spoke a word,_ " declared Mustang, still speaking in rhythm. " _I hurt him... and, O, he hurt me too / because everything's absurd!_ "

Ed facepalmed. "And, to make matters worse, it's _bad_ poetry!"

"That is the nature of the Pearl of Li Bai," said Chase, and Roy looked up to see the man perched on a stalagmite point above him. His hair was singed and smoking, and his armor was scorched, but that was the only mark of Roy's attack on him. "It causes whomever it is used against to spout poetry, non-stop."

Roy bared his teeth in a silent snarl, even as he said, " _I take a stand and I’m stubborn, you say. Okay, I am. So are you. What are we to do? When impasse comes to pass to our dismay forestalling allies-at-odds, (nothing new), whose blood see-through bond obliges breakthrough?_ "

Ed's hands clenched in his hair as he struggled through the frustration. Then, losing control, he screamed, "What the _hell did he just say?!"_

Jack was of no help in translating; he was incapacitated by laughter.

Chase grinned. "What your commander is attempting to do is say that being forced to speak poetry is not going to stop him from winning the battle."

“ _Let the fighting begin: Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday! Whose turn is it? Who started it? Who cares? I care not; I finish it now!”_

"Can't that thing have at least made it _good poetry?" roared Ed in frustration._

Chase was already laughing, already leaping away from Roy's attack.

The battle continued, the two men managing to score on each other a handful of times as they ducked and wove over the uneven terrain; zig-zagging away from attacks and taking pot-shots at each other.

From their vantage point, Ed and Jack could see that Chase was toying with Mustang, and it pissed the blond alchemist off to the back teeth.

He didn't dare interfere, however. If he did, the fight would be forfeit in an instant. All he could do was sit back and wait.

Roy, hunkered in the shadows of a pair of broken stalagmites and a stalactite that had come crashing down, wondered if this was really worth it.

" _Grinning skull watches grinning skull / and only then / sees that they’re alike,_ " he murmured softly. " _Battered body, broken bones / war-torn aching souls / no matter who they died for, cry – What’s left when the battle is won? / When all the scores are settled and you / are finally alone?_ "

" _This_ is what happens, my fair colonel."

The voice came from high above. Even as Roy was rolling over to look up, Chase had already dropped down to straddle the alchemist with a bone-jarring landing and that strong fist was already heading for his jaw.

“ _Despair – When hope is snuffed out like a guttering candle. Despair – When hope is sadistically excised with surgical precision. Despair – When hope is torn from a half-living body in huge gobbets—_ “

Unconsciousness mercifully shut him up when Young's fist slammed into his face.

Ed, curled into as small a ball as he could form himself, rocked back and forth slightly and muttered, "Thank the God I don't even believe in."

He scrambled for a hand-hold as the terrain rearranged itself. When all was said and done, the throne room was returned to its original state. The only difference was that Roy was lying crumpled in a heap, unconscious, with a swollen jaw. Chase, standing over him, was giving off a scent reminiscent of burnt leather and his hair and armor had most definitely been scorched.

Ed ran over and dropped to his knees beside his colonel and began checking the other man over. Jack stood slowly from the throne and strolled over to where Chase stood waiting.

"Like I said," Jack murmured, and the expression on his face showed his supreme pleasure in Chase's victory, "you are _made_ of awesome."

Chase grinned. Reaching out, he caught hold of his lover and pulled Jack sharply up against his chest and leaned in for a kiss, which Spicer eagerly gave. Battle made them both horny, but for different reasons: Jack only got excited when watching Chase battle somebody who wasn't him; Chase got excited because he enjoyed winning.

When the two of them broke the kiss, they heard the sound of someone clearing his throat and looked down to find Ed scowling up at them.

"Now that you two are done sucking each other's brains out," gritted the small alchemist, "what happens now?"

"Now, he will be given the chance to rest – as will you," said Chase, still holding Jack. "In the morning, he will assume a cat form and _you_ will be given the chance to go back to your home to fix your sibling and yourself. Then, you will return to give me back the Jin Dan Ruby. Once that is accomplished, you, Mustang, and the information gathered for you will go home – hopefully for good."

Ed scowled. "Wait... I thought you said—“

"I said that _if_ you won, the information would stay here. I never said you couldn't take it if you lost." Chase smirked. "You will be punished enough. You are being given the opportunity to use the Jin Dan Ruby for a limited amount of time for a limited purpose _and_ you must return it."

Fullmetal bared his teeth in a furious grimace. "Rub it in, why don't you?" He leaped to his feet. "Listen: We don't want to change our _entire_ world! Or even set the whole thing right! But there's these monsters called homunculi that are—“

Chase held up his hand. "I know what they are. I witnessed their birth in Flamel's laboratory."

Ed's jaw dropped even as his eyes flared wide.

"You and the others of your kind will be able to handle them – or not. It doesn’t matter to me. I am allowing you this _one_ chance to restore yourself and your brother to normal. Argue with me further and I will rescind the offer."

"You made a bet on it!"

Chase flicked an eyebrow upward. "So I did. But, as you may have surmised by now... I'm _evil_."

Ed growled, low and full of hate. "Bastard...!"

Jack laughed. "Yeah, but he's a _magnificent_ bastard."

"You're only sayin' that 'cause you're in love – which is just _weird!_ " Ed howled.

"That I'm in love with a _guy?_ "

"No! That you're in love with a _lizard!_ "

"He isn't a 'lizard'!" Jack retorted hotly, letting go of Chase and moving to face Ed directly.

"Sure looks like one from here!"

"Which isn't saying much since your perspective comes from so _short_ a distance off the ground!"

An infuriated shriek wrapped around the sound of two hands clapping together. In a heartbeat, the new metal of Ed's right arm had elongated past his fist, forming a deadly spike.

Chase knocked Jack aside and the metal spike clanged against his armor as it burrowed in about an inch through the chest plate. By that time, he'd caught hold of the elbow joint and _yanked; bending it against Ed's will so that the blond youth stumbled closer. Reaching out, Chase wrapped his hand around Elric's throat and _squeezed.__

"Do not _ever_ think to injure or kill my Jack," growled the dragon-lord, and every part of his eyes were glowing red.

Ed thrashed as much as he could, which wasn't a lot. "Called—me—sh'rt—!“

"So he did. And so you are. What is _wrong_ with you that you have no control over yourself when someone states the obvious to you?" Chase sneered and tossed Ed away. "Pathetic!"

Ed stumbled backwards and tripped over Mustang's prone body. He went down in a flurry of red, but immediately sat up again. Coughing, he glared up through squinted, teary eyes and rasped, "Arrogant jerk!"

Chase, now calm and eyes un-glowy, crossed his arms over his chest. "I've earned the right to be. Now, you have a choice to make: Do you mind your manners and thus keep the opportunity to go home with the Jin Dan Ruby? Or do you continue to mouth off to me and end up as a cat alongside your colonel?"

The blond alchemist longed to lunge up and rip the hateful man's throat out with his teeth. However, the click of a weapon caught his attention, and he looked over to see Jack pointing a gun at him with a furious expression on his face.

"Spicer!" snapped Chase, his voice cold.

"He managed to break through your armor," said Jack, and his voice was pure loathing. "He could have _killed_ you. No – fucking – _way_ does he get away with it!"

"And had you not _provoked_ him," said Chase snidely, "I would not have been forced to put myself in the way of his blade!"

"What 'forced'?" snapped Jack, still glaring at Ed. "You didn't have to!"

"Think again, xin ài," murmured Chase. He stepped over to his lover's side and lightly rested his hand on Spicer's back. "Do you really think I would stand by and do nothing with you in danger? No; I will not suffer the loss of you, my Jack."

The wrathful expression evaporated from Jack's face and his aim sagged away from Ed's blond head. "You... Oh, man... Chase..."

"Ewwwwwwwwwwwww," groaned Ed, his face screwing up in a grimace. " _Please_ don't get all smoochy-face on him again! Once is enough per day!"

"Spoken like an idiot who's never been in love!" said Jack, and then he ignored Ed to focus on his lover.

Unseen, Ed opened his mouth to retort; to say that he, too, _did_ know what it was like... and then, closed his mouth swiftly and glanced at the inert form of Roy Mustang.

Chase took Jack's laser pistol away from him and tucked it into the back of his sash. Reaching up, he stroked his lover's face and watched, pleased, as Spicer instantly snuggled into his touch.

"Make your choice, Edward Elric," he said, without looking away from Jack's content face.

Ed sighed. "I'll behave," he said tiredly. "I don't _have_ any other choice – not really."

"Not if you wish to restore your brother," agreed Chase.

"Why are you—?“

"I have my reasons. You do not need to know them."

It was on the tip of Ed's tongue to snap back, but he had promised to behave, and so stayed silent.

Chase smirked. Lifting his left hand, he snapped his fingers, and some of his warriors came forward.

"Return Mustang to the room he and Elric share," he ordered. "Bring food for Elric; have broth waiting for Mustang."

After all, it was highly unlikely Roy would _want_ to chew his food anytime soon.

Ed got to his feet and alchemized his automail back to normal. Then, he helped get Roy's limp body draped over the back of the lion that stepped up for the purpose. They exited the throne room, escorted by a tiger and a black jaguar, while another tiger went off in the direction of the kitchen.

Still in the throne room, Jack was staring at Chase's damaged chest armor as he touched the jagged metal carefully.

"You're really alright?" he asked quietly. "He didn't puncture you?"

"The blade didn't get far enough in to hurt me," assured Chase, and he began unbuckling the straps that held the chest plate in place. He would have to re-forge the armor that evening.

"I'm sorry," said Jack, and he moved to help by removing the shoulder guards. "I didn't..."

"No, you didn't think," agreed Chase quickly.

"No!" The red head shook swiftly. "Not _that_. I just... I didn't realize you'd take the hit for me. It's never happened before, so I didn't know. If I'd known..."

"If you had – and I find myself discouraged that you _didn't_ know – you still would have done the same," replied Chase easily. "You and he are possessed of the same hot-headed temper, after all."

"Only where your safety is concerned," muttered Jack. "I hate the thought of losing you."

"Then be mindful of me in the future. What you say to an enemy might then impact on my health."

Jack nodded, and reached out to touch the unmarred black tunic that stretched across Chase's chest. "Yes, sir."

The dragon-lord shivered at the sound of such a subservient phrase coming from his lover. Rather than risk pouncing on Jack and rutting the youth there and then, however, he turned on his heel and stalked away, carrying his armor with him.

Jack watched him go with the smile of someone who was in deep, deep smit.

*~*~*~*

Ed sat on his bed, gnawing on a chicken leg and watching Roy sleep. The man had yet to wake up. Ed only hoped that when Mustang _did_ wake, he wouldn't be brain damaged.

"Anymore than he already is," groused the younger alchemist, and ignored the anxiety that made his heart beat a little bit harder.

To Ed's surprise, Roy shifted and groaned just then.

"Timing," muttered Elric, and he climbed off the bed to go check on his leader.

Reaching out, he touched Roy carefully with his automail hand and shook. "Mustang? Roy? Hey... you okay?"

The Flame Alchemist groaned and began the heavier squirming motions of a man coming awake when he didn't want to.

Ed sighed. "Hold that thought." He headed over to the door, opened it, and looked out. Two tigers were perched outside, on guard duty, and they lifted their heads when he stuck his out.

"Hey," he said. "Could you let His Royal Bastardness know Mustang's awake? Thanks."

With that, he pulled back into the room and shut the door.

Striding over to the bed, he found Roy beginning to push himself blearily upright. "Roy... how you doin'?"

Ink-black eyes focused falteringly on him.

And then...

" _Nightmares / haunting me / demons of the night / wanting me,_ " muttered the older alchemist. " _Brave enough / to touch me while I sleep / lying here / scared to count these sheep..._ "

Ed's eyes widened in terror.

" _Carresses of death / while I dream / playing out / each deadly scene / screaming in the night / they won’t leave / I can't fight—_ “

Ed scrambled for the door, bolted out, and slammed it shut.

A few moments later, when Chase arrived – his armor newly re-forged – he lifted a quizzical eyebrow to find Ed standing in the hallway and staring warily at the door to his and Mustang's room as if it were only moments away from attacking him.

"Fullmetal?" he queried politely. "You have a problem with the door?"

"No – I have a problem with what's _behind_ the door!" snapped Ed. He pointed at it with a quivering finger and arm; the expression he showed to Chase almost had the dragon-lord laughing at the barely restrained hysteria of it. "The showdown is _over_ , damn it!"

"Yes, I'm aware of that," said Chase. He opened the door and stepped through.

Roy's obsidian eyes, narrowed with anger, locked onto Chase the instant he stepped inside.

" _I said ‘hello’, You said ‘hi’ / and because neither wanted to cry / that was all they would utter / and neither could mutter / more words, not even goodbye!_ "

Chase paused. "Ah."

"What 'ah'? No 'ah'!" yowled Ed from behind him. "Like I said: the showdown is over! _Why_ is he still doing that?"

Chase crossed his left arm over his stomach and propped his right elbow on the back of his left fist. His right hand covered the grin on his face.

"Some Shen-Gong-Wu do not stop working merely because the person the device has been used on is unconscious. The Pearl of Li Bai causes the victim to spout poetry non-stop," he explained for the second time.

Ed's gold eyes narrowed. "Until you _make_ the damned thing stop!"

Chase nodded; his once-again luxurious hair rustling over his back.

"Then do it! He just – he woke up! I asked how he was doing, and he started babbling about nightmares—“

"Nightmares?" echoed the dragon-lord. He lifted an eyebrow as he continued to look at Roy. "What about?"

Roy's aching jaw chattered as he struggled to hold back the words. His lips peeled back, his eyes narrowed; resulting in a very frightening scowl.

But, in the end, not enough to stop him.

“ _All the pain / The pain in my life you can't see it but I can / It’s horrible and disgusting / I wish the pain wasn't in my life / But it is and its killing me / The pain is causing me to lose my friends, family and people who I care about / The pain is always there, at work and at home pain follows me everywhere / Pain is everywhere in this world / it’s even following you and me right now / But the best thing to do is fight the pain / I am and its helping a little bit / It will either end you up dead or in the hospital / Pain is everywhere / Pain / Pain / Pain._ ”

Chase's arms dangled down by his sides and his jaw dropped open in a graceless display of horrified disgust. Before he could say or do anything, he was spun violently around and his face yanked down close to Ed's, and he found himself staring into gold eyes that were almost blazing with murderous fury.

" _Fix – him_ ," snarled the young alchemist.

As soon as he let go, Chase moved to do so; there was no way he was leaving Mustang in _that_ condition. He'd be driven mad by the time Elric returned from his mission.

 

*~*~*

 

Roy sipped some of the richly flavored broth that had been brought for him, winced as the heat passed briefly over the inside of his aching jaw, and then vanished.

"Oh, don't give me that look," said Chase dryly when Mustang glared at him. "It could have been worse; I could have kept the effects of the Pearl of Li Bai going."

"I hate you for that alone," declared Roy passionately, and winced again as his jaw was jarred.

"I'm used to being hated," murmured the dragon-lord smugly.

"Made a career out poking the masses with sticks, huh?" sniped Ed.

"It's a natural talent," retorted Chase, mocking Ed with his own words from their first meeting.

Ed rolled his eyes, but said nothing else; only watched Roy sip his broth.

Roy let the spoon rest in the bowl and sighed as he stretched carefully. He nodded a thank-you to Ed when the automail hand reached over to steady the tray. "You know, I wouldn't have minded if I could have simply come up with some decent limericks. Like: _'One day after drinking some booze / Two enemies’ minds seemed to fuse / With no push nor shove / The pair fell in love / And all night they screamed their "wahoo"s!’_ ”

Both Chase and Edward stared at him in consternation and he fidgeted slightly. "What?"

Ed sighed. "I hate to break it to you, Colonel No-Talent, but that wasn't any better." He glanced at Chase. "I thought it was the Shen-Gong-Wu that did that to him?"

Young shook his head. "The Pearl of Li Bai only causes the victim to spout poetry. The creation of it must come from their own mind."

"So the badness was all _him_."

"Yes."

Ed grinned wickedly at his leader. "Don't _ever_ enter a poetry contest. You'd be laughed out of Amestris."

Roy gave his subordinate a glare and refused to reply.

"If I might have your attention," drawled Chase, and smirked when they both looked at him. "Thank you. Mustang, I shall let you have this evening to yourself. Tomorrow morning, you will be placed in your new feline form and will remain that way until such time as Edward returns from your world."

"Thank you," said Roy grudgingly. He wished he could just grunt the way Ed usually did, but he was far too polished a man to behave so rudely.

Chase's smirk deepened; he was aware of how grating it was for Mustang to be so polite to him in the face of defeat.

"Excellent. All will be ready tomorrow morning. I suggest the two of you make the most of this time and... rest."

With that, he walked to the door and departed, leaving the two alchemists alone together.

Ed fidgeted as he sat on Roy's bed and looked anywhere but at his commanding officer. "Alone in a room with you after you've had your butt kicked? I'd almost rather have the bad poetry."

Immediately, Mustang retorted with: “ _From the depths of the crypt at St. Giles / Came a scream that echoed for miles / Said the Vicar: ‘Good gracious! / Has Father Ignatius / Forgotten the Bishop has piles?’_ ”

Ed leaped off the bed with a screech like an injured cat's. "Damn it! Stop _doing_ that!"

Roy gave the younger alchemist an almost innocent look. "I'm only trying to _help_ , Fullmetal."

"No, you're trying to make me molt bald in sheer frustration, is what you're doing!" snapped Ed as he paced raggedly back and forth, glaring. "What the hell is _wrong_ with you?"

"Oh, _I_ don't know," growled Roy. "Maybe it's because I _lost_ the fight which means that now you have to go back to Amestris _alone_ —“

Ed crashed to a halt and gaped at his leader for a long moment. Then, as fury crept over his face, he pointed an accusing finger at the man.

"Y-You..." he sputtered angrily. "You _bastard!_ "

" _What?_ Ed—“

"After what I told you—“

"—calm down, right now—“

"—how could you think—“

"—I _mean_ it, Edward!"

"—that I'd leave you here to—“

" _I know you won't leave me behind!_ "

" _Good, 'cause I'd fight through hell itself just to save you!_ "

Both men recoiled and shut up instantly.

Staring down at his now cool soup, Roy swirled the spoon through the rich, golden broth slowly. "Edward...?"

"Yeah?" came the quiet, almost defeated response.

He cleared his throat. "It's only... I can understand the powerful lure of the Philosopher's Stone. If it happens that you don't get back... I'll understand."

Ed snorted. Wheeling around, he came back over to Mustang's bed, clapped his hands, and then touched his fingertips to the bowl. A flash of light, and then steam rose from the once-again hot broth.

"Don't be stupid, Stupid," he said without heat to the man watching him. "I'm _not_ going to leave you here."

"But, if it means our world gets the Philosopher's Stone – if it means the homunculi are vanquished—“

Ed shook his head and looked at a point over Roy's head. "No. I've done some more thinking about it and... well... you're right. Our world would be destroyed if the Philosopher's Stone was brought to it. Every alchemist on the planet would tear the place apart trying to get hold of it. The homunculi themselves will be after it the instant I bring it back. I'm gonna have to work quick to fix Al and me. That's all I ever really wanted it for, anyway."

Roy reached out and caught hold of Ed's left hand and squeezed gently. "And your mother...?"

The younger man's eyes closed on a pained sigh. "I've learned that lesson, Roy. She's... gone on. I was wrong to try to bring her back. _Selfish_. I tried to say it was because _Al_ needed Mom... but the truth was... _I_ wanted her. Me. I wanted my mom."

Roy nodded and squeezed Ed's hand again, gratified when Edward squeezed back.

Those gold eyes opened and flicked to look at him. "Mom – y'know, I don't believe in any one true God. All I know about is the Gate of Truth. But, if there _is_ a heaven... I'm pretty sure it's 'cause Mom's there. And I don't want to drag her out of whatever peace she's earned. She can stay where she is. I'll fix Al and me, and we'll do whatever it is we need to do before _we_ go – whenever that is."

Roy gave a little shudder and his grip tightened. "Pardon me if I choose to not think of a day when you aren't there anymore."

Ed gave a tiny smile. "You'd really miss having that pain in your neck fade away?"

"What can I say? I'm a masochist," teased Roy, and he stroked his thumb over the back of the younger man's hand.

Ed watched the motion of the thumb he could feel only on that hand – for now.

"That's another thing," he said suddenly. "I don't _want_ to stay in Amestris if you're not there, either. I mean, Al has Winry – or he will, after this is all done – but you... well... you're _my_ bastard, y'know?"

Roy felt as if he was standing on the edge of a precipice and he was staring at the only thing that would make it worth the fall if he went over. "Ed...? Are you...?"

Ed shrugged and looked away. "I dunno. All I know is you've _always_ been there; always _worried_ about me and Al. Not because you had to, but because we _mattered_ to you. And not just because of our alchemy, either – because we were just us."

"Because I _care_ , Edward," said Roy quietly. "I always have. Only the style of the caring has changed; not the strength of it."

Gold eyes – wide-open, now, and vulnerable with emotion – looked down into Roy's eyes fully, and he felt as if he'd been set on fire.

"I don't... understand," said Ed, and his voice was almost a whine; was closer to a groan of confusion. "Why would you give a damn about us?"

Roy shook his head. "I can't provide you with an answer you'd identify with, Ed. If you were capable of comprehending it, you wouldn't have to ask."

"I wish I did," groused Ed as he looked away. "There are _some_ times I wish I wasn't so... remote. Al, he's great. He can connect with anyone. Me... Not so much."

"I thought you preferred it that way."

"Sure, for the most part. It makes me a better alchemist and I can't hate being so much smarter than most of the bozos in the world. But... If I could translate emotion as well as I do alchemical texts..."

"Why would you _want to?"_

"So I could tell the people who matter to me – _really_ matter – _why_ they matter to me. That they _do_."

Even as he said it, Ed was looking directly at Roy again; giving the older man that burning-in-fire feeling.

Roy grinned easily. "You don't think maybe it's enough for the people who care about you in return to know even that much?"

"I don't want to be 'enough'. I want to be 'everything'."

Mustang tugged Ed a little bit closer. "You don't think you are? Or that you could be?"

"I can't understand why anyone would want to burden themselves with me." Ed shrugged; coldly accepting of his flaws as well as his perfections. "In case you hadn't noticed, Mustang, I'm a huge pain in the neck."

"Ah, but you've forgotten, Fullmetal," said Roy, his grin returning. "I'm a masochist."

Ed stopped breathing for a moment. Then, hesitantly, he smiled.

The two of them stayed silent after that. Everything that really needed to be said had been said.

 

*~*~*~*

 

The next morning, Roy and Ed followed their tiger escorts through the halls of Chase Young's mountain palace.

The tigers took them straight to Chase's throne room. Ed muttered under his breath about breakfast, but wasn't serious about it. For once, he was so keyed up he wasn't certain he could eat anything and keep it down.

Roy wasn't doing much better. Ed could tell because of the military perfection of his posture and the measured steps of his stride. Roy had a laissez-fare attitude for the most part; he only hid in military regulation when he was feeling too "out in the open".

Ed brushed the fingers of his automail hand lightly over Mustang's thigh. When the ink-black eyes looked down at him, Ed offered up a supportive grin and received a graceful wink in return that made his insides do funny things.

As they approached the doors to the throne room, both of them fell back into old habits. They separated and retreated behind near-identical expressions of cool aloofness; their spines stiff with anticipation of something unpleasant.

Then, the great doors were swinging open, and they were striding through.

Again, Chase sat on his throne; lord of all he surveyed. Again, Jack stood by his right hand; honor guard, attendant, consort.

Roy was reminded of a painting he'd seen in one of the art gallery halls in Young's home; of a brown-skinned man dressed in brightly colored clothes with a matching brightly colored cloth wound about his head as a hat. The brown-skinned man had been reclining on an altar of pillows and several lovely women had reclined around him as well. Only one of the women had worn a weapon; a sheathed knife tucked into the belt at her waist, and she'd been the woman closest to the man.

As he halted a few feet before the throne, Roy had to fight back a smile as he thought, _Jack is the knifed-consort in the painting, I'm sure of it. Chase is welcome to him. I've got **two**._

His thoughts flicked briefly to the young man at his side and to the young woman who was farther away; undoubtedly frazzled to the quick at his disappearance.

Then, Chase politely cleared his throat, and Roy's attention snapped to him swiftly.

"Are you prepared?" asked the dragon-lord calmly.

"As I'll ever be," replied Mustang.

Gold eyes turned slightly to Roy's left; met gold eyes blazing with passion and fury. "And you?"

"What do you mean?" growled Ed.

Chase was silent for a moment, and then smiled. "Never mind. What I was originally going to ask has no bearing here. I shall ask instead: Would you prefer to use the Jin Dan Ruby on yourself here, first, and then return to your world for your brother?"

Ed shook his head. "I don't know what this is going to do. If there's only enough juice to work once... I want Al to have it more'n me."

Chase nodded. "I understand. Jack...?"

The albino youth stepped forward and reached into his coat. He smirked when both alchemists stiffened instinctively.

A moment later, he drew a smooth, wooden box out of an inner coat pocket and handed it to Ed.

Ed looked at the box. It was a very old item and covered in etchings of dragons and phoenixes; latticed with thin strips of metal.

He didn't give a damn about it. Swiftly, he opened the box, and there was the Jin Dan Ruby – or, as far as he was concerned, the Philosopher's Stone.

He looked up and turned to share the sight of it with Roy.

Only to find Roy _shrinking_.

He gaped, the box snapping closed around the Jin Dan Ruby, as Roy Mustang's blue uniform faded into blue-black fur. The man's bone structure was rearranging and a feline shape emerging. Roy's mouth was open, and the pained cry he was shouting merged into the roar of a jungle cat.

"Roy!" yelled the younger alchemist, and he would have dropped down to hold onto the newly emerging black jaguar, only to be caught and pulled away by Jack.

When he rounded on the albino genius, Spicer gave him a cold look and shook his head. "You don't want to be too close to him right now. He hasn't had time to settle into his feline instincts; to let them merge with his human thoughts. And, that was a scary, kinda painful thing to go through. Right now, he's going to want to beat the hell out of whatever's dumb enough to mess with him."

As if to illustrate the point, Chase's hand flicked up. Ed watched as an object was launched from it and rose up into the air... and then, came down, down, down and smacked onto the ground behind the newly formed, growling black jaguar.

Immediately, the beast that used to be Roy Mustang whirled and pounced on the object. Ed didn't know _what_ it was made of, but as he watched Roy snarl and rip and pound and shred, he knew that if it had been made of less sturdy material, the thing would have been in utter ruins by now and Roy's need to fight would have been turned on the men watching him.

"I think," said Chase through the noise of Roy's snarls and yowls as the jaguar moved away, still fighting with his new toy; "that now would be an ideal time for you to depart, Edward."

"What? I can't! He's—“ Ed's hand reached out, gesturing at Roy.

"He's the way he agreed to be and will _remain_ that way the longer you leave your mission unfulfilled," Chase pointed out.

"He'll be fine in a little bit," said Jack, unexpectedly offering reassurance. "He'll calm down and the human mind will take over again."

Ed sighed and scrubbed at his face with his gloved automail hand. "My life just keeps getting weirder."

Jack snickered. "That's kind of our schtick, y'know?"

"What: Purveyors in Weird?"

The albino teen grinned and shrugged.

Ed groaned quietly. He rolled his head on his neck, loosening his muscles, and then nodded to Chase. "Alright. I'm ready. How do I get back?"

Jack snorted. "Click your heels together three times and say 'Screw this, I'm outta here!'"

Ed blinked in confusion even as Chase put his hand to his mouth to muffle his laughter.

"I don't get it. What do my heels have to do with anything?" asked the alchemist with a wary look.

"Never mind; it's from an old moving picture that's very famous in this world," said Jack with a grin. "To get home, all you have to do is hold the Shí Xing Màng, think of where you _really_ wanna be, and say its name."

"What if I imagine a place that isn't _there_ anymore?"

Jack shook his head. "That's why this is the Shí Xing Màng and not the Sands of Time. The S.O.T will take you through time as well as space. The S.X.M will only take you through space. Wherever you go, it's the same time there as here."

Ed nodded. "Right." He put the box containing the Jin Dan Ruby in the deepest inner pocket of his red coat, and then pulled out the eight-rayed ruby that was the Shí Xing Màng. He glanced over at Roy, who was still trying to gut the toy he'd been given, and then back to Chase and Jack.

"Hey, uh... when he finally snaps out of it... tell him I'll be right back, okay? Even if it isn't true. Just..."

The two men nodded and Ed sighed. He hated to leave Roy like this, without a goodbye, but Chase was right: The sooner he went, the sooner he'd come back.

Fixing his destination firmly in his mind, he yelled, "Shí Xing Màng!" and disappeared in a flash of light.

 

*~*~*

 

Ed was shivering with relief that he'd made it home safely. He was braced against the front of Roy's desk, staring at the wooden surface with its pile of papers and stained ink blotter, and was wondering if he was really going to give in to his urge to kiss it, when he heard the distinctive click of a gun loading.

Very, very slowly, he turned around and found himself staring into the barrel of Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye's gun.

"Hello, Edward," said Roy Mustang's Right Hand Man coldly. "Such a pleasure to see you again."

Ed looked into Hawkeye's red-whiskey eyes and knew he was on very shaky footing. "H-Hi, Lieutenant!"

"Where," she began, her gun tilting up to press – ever-so-gently – to the skin of Ed's forehead, "is Colonel Mustang?"

"Trapped in another world and he's never coming back if I'm not there to go get him."

Clanking, lumbering metal rushed through the door, and Al's tinny voice filled the room.

" _Brother!_ You're—“ He cut off with a gasp. " _Lieutenant!_ "

Hawkeye slowly lowered her gun and re-holstered it. "Calm down, Alphonse. I had to be certain it's really Edward."

"By making me crap my only pair of pants?!" howled Ed, and wondered if he was going to have a heart attack.

A cool look of indifference. "I don't smell anything."

"Figure of spee- _eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!_ "

Ed yowled as Al rushed forward and swept him up into a tight, _tight_ hug.

" _Brother!_ " said Al, his voice burbling with happiness.

"Al – watch the _spike!_ "

Hawkeye smiled slightly as she watched the familiar "Elric Reunion" she'd grown accustomed to whenever the brothers were so rarely parted from each other. Quietly, she slipped away to go make discreet telephone calls. Havoc and the others needed to be called in from their searches.

 

*~*~*

 

"...and that's why I'm here," said Ed, holding a half-full mug of coffee. "I've got this one chance to fix me and Al, and then I've gotta take it back to that jerkface so I can trade it for Mustang."

Of course, he'd done a little editorializing. For the sake of Roy's dignity, he hadn't mentioned to his troops that the man had been turned into a _cat_.

Al was holding the box that contained the Jin Dan Ruby. It was open, and the soul of a young lad was looking down at the red crystal in silent awe and hope.

"This is... really... it, Brother?" he asked, and his metallic voice sounded close to tears he couldn't cry. "This will give us back our bodies?"

Ed nodded with a tired smile. "That's really it, Al. You can feel it, can't you? That pull that only we alchemists really understand?"

The helmet on the suit of armor nodded slowly with a muted grating noise. "I can feel it. It's... amazing, Brother."

"So, how do we play this?" asked Breda, looking up from his own mug of coffee. He pointed at the box Al held. "If that's really the Philosopher's Stone, and those ho-monkey things are looking for it... How do we keep you and Al safe when you use it? Won't using it just send up a flare to those monsters?"

Al swiftly closed the box even as Ed nodded grimly.

"Chances are good they've already felt it – just as soon as I bopped back into this world, they probably smelled it that fast. Which means we're going to have to play fast and dirty because I really don't know what this is going to do to us," said the older Elric.

Fuery blinked through the thick lenses of his glasses. "What do you mean, Ed? It's the ultimate alchemy... ah... magic, right? If there's no transaction, then...."

"Just because we _supposedly_ don't have to give anything back doesn't mean anything, Cain," Ed said with a smirk. "This is going to be something _huge. Al's entire body... my limbs... We just can't take a shock like that and flick it off like it's nothing."_

"Understandable," said Falman. "But, I agree with Breda – where will we do this so we're relatively safe?"

Ed and Al shifted uncomfortably.

"Falman," said Al hesitantly, "we don't expect you all to—“

"Oh, don't even try it, Al," said Havoc with a grin. The unlit cigarette in his mouth twitched and jumped, but somehow stayed in place. "We're a _team_ , right? Like we'd leave you guys to fend for yourselves."

"That's very sweet," said Ed snidely, "but there are going to be some _really_ ugly monsters after this thing—“

"Keeping you safe means getting Colonel Mustang back where he belongs," said Hawkeye firmly, and everyone turned to look at her. She softened slightly. "And, Edward, we don't want anything to happen to you or Al _anyway_. You should know better by now."

Ed had the grace to blush even as he looked away to meet Al's gaze. "Well, Al...? Where do you think the safest place would be?"

"Not here," said Al immediately. "We know the homunculi have invaded the military—“

"More like they're _running_ it," said Havoc with disgust as he sat back, stacking his arms behind his head for support.

"—and I don't want to go to Risembool. Not yet. Not for this. It's too far away _and_ I don't want to bring the trouble right to Granny and Winry's doorstep," said Al firmly.

"Yeah," agreed Ed. "One look at _this_ and Winry'll vaporize the homunculi just so she can have some alone time with a new toy."

As he spoke, Ed removed his black jacket; he'd already shed his red coat. As the black fabric of his short-waist jacket came off, the blue-suits in the office gasped and leaned forward for a closer look.

Ed's arm was quite streamlined and slender, and matched the proportions of his real arm perfectly. The metal plating that formed the connection socket to his shoulder and chest was also thinner and more compact. The metal had a matte finish to it, but it still managed a beautiful – if muted – gleam in the light of the table lamps.

"Holy _cow_ , Ed!" snapped Havoc. "You really _did_ get a new arm!"

Ed rolled his eyes and said nothing.

Al reached out to touch his brother's new arm. "You said it's a new type of metal?"

"A new _mixing_ of _old_ metals," said Ed with a grin. "And the notes on how it's made are included in the information waiting to come back when I go trade up for Mustang."

Breda reached out and put his hand under Ed's arm and began hefting it. A grin split across his face. "Hot damn, Elric! This thing's practically as light as a feather! Does it do the spike thing, too?"

"Does it even _better_ thanks to the greater elasticity of the mix," said Ed smugly. "That's part of why I want to make sure this deal goes through. As sure as Hawkeye can shoot the balls off a fruit-fly at a hundred yards, Winry is _bound_ to get wind of this. And if I don't have the notes for her, at the very least, I am a dead alchemist walking."

Al's mortified "Brother!" was drowned under the chorus of raucous laughter.

"I don't know," said Falman when he finally had a chance to speak. "I'd rather like to meet these two men who have hosted you in their home. They sound like an absolute treasure trove of information."

"They are," said Ed with a grimace. "But, like I said: They've compiled information for me to bring back. I'll get it when I get Mustang."

"But—“

" _But_ ," said Hawkeye, and everyone instantly snapped to attention, "first we figure out a safe place for Ed and Al to transmute themselves back to normal."

They were all silent for a while as they thought.

Finally, Breda sighed and leaned back in his seat.

"The way I see it, right _here_ is the safest place to be," he said. "Here – this office."

"How so, Breda?" asked Fuery, curious.

"Because the military owns everything – or just about," said Breda, and he held up one hand to begin ticking off points by using his fingers. "Plus... this is Mustang's office, right? Nobody thinks anything's weird about strange noises or lights coming out of it thanks to him being a State Alchemist. _Plus_ there's the fact that, whenever Ed manages to make the colonel truly angry, there's a fireball or two usually trailing Ed down the hallway."

Ed rolled his eyes even as Havoc and Al ribbed him good-naturedly for what was true.

"Then, there's _this_ to consider. The homunculi may or may not have the brass dancing to their tune. But the rank-and-file are _always_ kept in the dark about everything. So, with Mustang being pretty popular among the regular grunts, if the monsters decide to attack here, they'll have to get through the soldiers that _aren't_ in on their shenanigans."

Glances were traded and a few heads nodded slowly, thoughtfully.

"Go ahead, Breda," said Hawkeye. "You look like you've got another thought on your mind."

"Yeah. The Fuhrer is away right now. If the homunculi have gotten to _anyone_ , it's gotta be him. If they wanna control the State, they gotta control the Fuhrer," said the stocky man grimly.

Havoc nodded sharply. "That's true. I mean, have you ever _seen_ the man? He's always _smiling!_ That ain't natural."

Hawkeye gave him a quelling glare and motioned at Breda to continue.

"So, yeah. The Fuhrer is away. Ed... Do any of the homunculi have the power to just _go_ anywhere instantaneously, like you did?"

Ed shook his head. "Had a little help from my friend." Very, very carefully, he flashed them a glimpse of the Shí Xing Màng.

Nobody made an outward motion, but they all signaled in some way that they understood.

"Okay, so the homunculi can't zip in and out instantaneously," muttered Breda. "That's good. Now, if we keep everything on the down-low, we should be able to pull this off."

"We need a contingency plan," said Hawkeye immediately. "We _can't_ hope for a smooth ride. If the homunculi do attack, I want an escape plan. We can't stay penned in like sitting ducks."

"I can have a driver bring a car around and park it nearby," said Havoc.

"Great. But we're in a sixth floor office," said Falman. "How are we supposed to get down and outside without killing ourselves in a fall if we’re forced to use the window? I very much doubt our enemies will give us time to lower a handy rope or two and wait idly by while we climb down."

"Brother and I can work on creating a secret exit," said Al quickly.

"Shouldn't you conserve your strength?" asked Fuery.

"Al _definitely_ should," said Ed. "I'll do it. A quick clap, a bit of will, and I'll have an exit ready for us."

"But—“

"Do it," said Hawkeye. "We've all seen your abilities at work. I doubt this will take a lot out of you."

Ed nodded. "Should we wait for night?"

"No. Mustang is usually out of here in the evenings," said Havoc immediately. "Plus, in the dark, any alchemical flashes will show up brighter. The best we can hope for is that you can manage to learn how to transmute subtly in the next few minutes."

"You're a real comedian," sniped Ed.

Hawkeye stood up and, to a man, the others automatically tensed.

"Go," she said, and pointed. "All it needs is to be big enough to fit Breda through it. Everything else is up to you."

Ed nodded and walked over to the window-wall of the office.

Havoc got up, stretched, and walked over to the phone that was perched on Mustang’s desk.

He was interrupted by a flash of blue light before he could pick up the receiver.

Everyone watched as blue light rippled and flared and sparked outwards from Ed’s hands. The sheer friction of so much energy cutting through the air created a powerful breeze around the short, slender young man’s body.

The left corner of the office on the window-wall rippled and pulsed. The ripple moved downwards, through the floor.

Only a few moments later, the phone on Mustang's desk rang shrilly.

Havoc picked it up. "Colonel Mustang's off—“

"What the _hell_ are those lunatic alchemists doing up there?!" demanded a furious, gruff voice. "My office just sprouted a new growth!"

Before Havoc could reply, the doors to Mustang's office burst open and a tall, red-headed man stood there, panting.

"What's going on?" he cried. "Colonel Hartgrave sent me up here to tell the alchemists she wants whatever's going on to stop!"

"Did you hear me, mister?" barked the gruff voice in Havoc's ear. "I want an answer!"

"Ah... Yes, sir, Major Emmerich!" Havoc held the receiver away from his ear and turned to face Hawkeye. His eyebrows were high and he fixed a pleading expression on his face as he gestured at the receiver.

Hawkeye hesitated. She needed to deal with Lieutenant Cavan standing in the doorway.

Just then, Major Armstrong loomed up behind the red-haired lieutenant.

"What's all this, then?" the ginormous alchemist asked in his deep, gravelly voice. "There's reports of walls popping out of place all the way down to street level!"

Lieutenant Cavan glanced over his shoulder, meeped, and quickly stepped away from the hulk in the doorway.

Hawkeye marched over and took the phone from Havoc and gestured for him to go deal with the two in the doorway.

"Major Emmerich, sir!" she said crisply, identifying herself just by speaking.

"Lieutenant Hawkeye! What the hell—?“

Havoc, clearly able to hear the major's voice, scooted over to handle the alchemist-major.

"Hey there, Cavan," said Havoc easily. "Long time, no see!"

The red-haired man gave Havoc a wary look. "We saw each other _yesterday_ , Havoc."

"Oh, right, so we did, so we did," agreed Havoc.

"Jean," said Cavan, his voice taking on a tone of begging. "Colonel Hartgrave is furious!"

Havoc's grin was slightly wicked. Nudging his friend with an elbow, he said, "Petey, Hartgrave is _always_ furious about something!"

Peter Cavan mangled his lips. He wanted to agree with Havoc, but didn't _dare_ – not with Major Armstrong standing right there.

As it was, Alex Armstrong glared reprovingly down at the two men. His mustache twitched frenetically for a moment, and then two massive hands lifted and came down on Cavan's and Havoc's shoulders and squeezed companionably.

"Now, boys... It isn't right to speak ill of a lady!" he exhorted gallantly. "Colonel Hartgrave is a loyal member of the State Military! She works hard at a thankless task! Try to find some charity for her, hmm?"

Cavan and Havoc both winced as they felt their bones grinding under Armstrong's grip. Neither one was certain if he was doing it intentionally or not.

"Y-Yes, sir!" squeaked Cavan.

"Sure thing, Major!" gasped Havoc.

"Excellent! Now, I believe I'll go say hello to young Edward. I haven't seen him for days, but I know he's been busy working hard on that project for Colonel Mustang; this _must_ be part of it."

"What project?" asked Cavan immediately. "I have to tell Colonel Hartgrave—“

"You may tell her that it is State Alchemist business, Lieutenant!" said Armstrong jovially. "That is all she needs to know."

Edward had stepped back when the transmutation was complete. He was critiquing his work – the hidden door, the stability of the chute, the angle of descent – when he heard Armstrong's bass rumble. Instinctively, he tried to tune the man out, but a few words caught his attention.

_Edward... blahblah... hard... blahblah... Mustang._

To his horror, he _blushed. His skin prickled with such intense heat that it hurt him as he saw his own nose turn bright red._

Al, standing beside him, was watching him in puzzlement. "Brother...? What are you—?“

"Nothing!" yelped Ed. "Absolutely nothing! Not a thing! I'm all done here!"

He turned, and crashed into the man-mountain that was Major Alex Armstrong, the Strong Arm Alchemist.

"Edward!" boomed the large man, and his arms opened wide.

Edward Elric screamed without a hint of shame.

 

*~*~*

 

Ed's voice was slightly hoarse as he finished the telling of his tale for the second time in twice as many hours. He gratefully accepted the glass of water his brother handed him and began drinking.

Armstrong was busy stroking his chin as he assimilated the information. Now he understood why his instincts had said to provide a cover story to Lieutenant Cavan; why Havoc had escorted Cavan out of the office with all due haste and Hawkeye had firmly dealt with all calls that had come in with regards to the new structure alterations.

"The Philosopher's Stone," he murmured, and lowered his hand so he could see both of them together. In his mind's eye, he wore a ring with a small red stone that shone like a splotch of fresh, innocent blood against his white military gloves.

"Yes," said Hawkeye, and her whiskey-red eyes were somber as she looked at him. She knew what Armstrong's involvement in the Ishbal Rebellion meant to the man. "And it will be used only to return the Elric brothers to normal."

Alex shuddered and looked at the younger major with concern. "It doesn't bother you to use something so evil?"

Edward met his gaze. "This one wasn't made from evil, Major. As I'm given to understand it, the Stone – or the Jin Dan Ruby, as they call it – was created by a Master Monk with a keen understanding of science. She used her training and her intelligence to create the stone, but not with evil; not _from_ evil."

"This was told to you by an evil man."

The gold gaze darkened; the blond head nodded. "Yeah. But, strangely enough, he has _honor_. It makes me crazy trying to figure him out, but he doesn't lie. He just... uses information to his advantage. I don't have any reason _not_ to believe him – just to be wary about _why_ he tells me anything."

"Like Colonel Mustang," said Hawkeye quietly, and the barest hint of a smile softened her mouth.

To everyone's surprise, Ed blinked in startlement – and then, blushed.

"Why do you keep blushing whenever someone says the colonel's name?" asked Al, curious.

_Oh, shit,_ Ed whined to himself. _Think fast, Elric._

The others were looking at him curiously, waiting for an answer.

Baring his teeth, he glared at them.

"I feel guilty, alright?!" he snapped. Crossing his arms over his chest, he scowled down at the floor. "He's still _stuck there_ , waiting for me to get back, so the trade can be made and we can both come home. And he wouldn't be stuck there if I hadn't wanted to accept the side-wager."

Armstrong's exceptionally large hand settled on Ed's back – gently.

"If Colonel Mustang accepted the wager, Edward, he did so for his own reasons," assured the man gruffly. "Whether you were for it or against it, if he accepted, he did it because _he_ wanted to."

Ed, who knew very well why Roy had accepted the wager, said nothing as he hunched under the hand that spread to cover most of his upper back.

"That's true," said Falman with a nod. "Colonel Mustang listens to advice, but he keeps his own counsel."

"Well said, Chief Warrant Officer Falman!" boomed the Strong Arm Alchemist.

"Right. Getting _off_ the subject of Ed's rare show of humility," said Havoc, "shouldn't we hurry this along? The car is waiting downstairs in case we need it. And those frickin' homunculi are the _reason_ time is of the essence. We don't _know_ where they are, so we can't keep track of them."

Ed turned to look at his brother. "He's right, Al. You ready for this?"

Al's helmet hunched downward a bit as he took his own turn staring at the floor. "I'm scared, brother. What if the effects wear off when the Stone goes back to the other world?"

Ed clenched his teeth. "I don't know. I didn't think of that. But, if it does – if we trade up, come back, and find that it does – we'll go back and challenge that lizard-freak again and again until we finally win the Stone for keeps."

"Good planning – for the _future_ ," said Breda as he stood up. He began moving towards the door, ready to stand guard. "For now, I suggest you guys get on with it."

"Second Lieutenant Breda," said Hawkeye firmly, and the man stopped before he could open the door. "Would you mind feeding Black Hayate before you take up your post? I don't want him whining from hunger and possibly warning away the targets."

Breda grinned and nodded. "You got it, boss." Opening the door, he stepped out neatly and pulled it shut.

Everyone went still and silent as they stared at the door in trepidation.

Then, slowly, they all looked at each other.

The homunculi were already there.

 

*~*~*

 

Al had stretched out on the sofa and Ed stood over him, holding the Philosopher's Stone. He turned his head to look at Hawkeye, who was standing beside him with her gun out; facing the door.

"How did you know?" he asked quietly.

"He seemed to know a little too much about the homunculi," she replied just as quietly.

Ed nodded and his narrowed eyes glared at the door. "Can't believe I missed that."

"It's understandable. But, now the time frame is even shorter. It's probably allowing you to change Al back to see if it really works. If the transmutation is successful, it will try to take the Stone. We must act quickly. _You_ must be prepared to change yourself on the run, Edward."

"Yeah," he said, and looked down at his brother again. "You ready, Al?"

"As I'll ever be, Brother," came the stoic reply.

Ed turned to glance quickly at the others, who gave him sharp nods of encouragement. Armstrong was closest to the door, ready to block the imposter girth of Breda when the homunculus came through the door.

Taking a deep breath, Ed turned back to his brother. He pointed the sharp-tipped end of the red crystal at the suit of armor and concentrated as he closed his eyes. He imagined his little brother as he'd been... and then, built on that image; trying his best to imagine what Al would look like now, at the age of fourteen.

Ed sent his will into the Stone.

Bright crimson light filled the room and a low, steady hum filled the air. Gasps sounded from the people in the room, but Ed remained steady. He could _feel_ the change taking place, but it wasn't a _strenuous_ exertion of his will.

When the flow of energy began dwindling, Ed let it. He knew, instinctively, that the transmutation was nearly complete. When the power trickled away and snipped off, he sighed and opened his eyes; languid in his surety of what he would find.

He smiled at the sight of a handsome young lad of fourteen lying on the couch, with caramel colored hair and features similar to his own.

Al's eyes opened, and they were a muted honey-brown color – just as Ed remembered them.

A smile flicked across pale lips even as those brown eyes began to drift closed.

"Brother," said the younger Elric, his voice was human and warm.

"It'll be okay, Al," said Ed. "Go to sleep, okay?"

"Mmmmm."

A moment later, Al was fast asleep; worn out by the transmutation that had given him his body back.

Ed turned to face the others, his face beautiful in the brilliance of his grin.

The doorknobs on the doors to the office rattled.

"Ed – do it!" Havoc whispered as he opened the secret door.

Ed shook his head. "No! Come over here and take Al. Start going down the escape chute! I'll do it in the car!"

Rather than argue, Havoc bolted across the room, scooped up Al, and headed for the chute. He was going to have to slide down the brass pole Ed had transmuted one-handed, but that would only lend speed to the escape. Making certain his glove was on tight, he stepped off the small platform. Havoc held Alphonse's sleeping body firmly against him and let gravity take control.

The door opened, and the creature wearing Breda's face stepped in, smirking.

"Hey... saw the light. I take it the change worked?" 'Breda' asked, and glanced at the couch.

He blinked when he saw that it was empty, looked to Ed, and then slowly around at the others in the office who were all staring at him intently.

His eyes lit on the open door in the corner of the office.

Abruptly, he laughed, and his voice was huskier now; lighter and yet heavy with evil. "So," he murmured casually. "What gave me away?"

"Wouldn't you like to know, Envy?" snarled Ed, the Jin Dan Ruby already tucked safely away in his inner pocket.

"I would, actually – that way, it won't trip me up again should I need Breda's form," said Envy as he melted into his usual form. He gave them all a mean little smirk from behind his spiky green bangs. "It's always the little things that catch me out, you see. I don't pay enough attention to the minute details of the filthy humans I impersonate. That's how Lieutenant Colonel – oh, pardon – _Brigadier General_ Hughes figured out I wasn't Maria Ross."

Every person in that office stiffened in disgust and horror.

" _You_ are the one who killed Mäes Hughes," whispered Armstrong; struck to his core so hard that his voice had no strength.

Envy laughed, delighted. "In the flesh! ...As it were."

"Where is the _real_ Second Lieutenant Heymans Breda?" demanded Falman coldly.

"Wouldn't _you_ like to know?" taunted Envy.

And then, he attacked.

 

*~*~*~*

 

He had to admit, it was _interesting_ being a cat.

The world had come alive in the form of scents. His depth perception and color-perception had dimmed noticeably, but his sense of smell had more than made up for it.

Take, for instance, the smell of the meat that was to be Chase Young's and Jack Spicer's dinner. In his human body, Roy would have smelled a faint tang of uncooked meat; perhaps even a little blood.

In his jaguar form, he smelled a richness of flavor that was unparalleled.

Which is why he really couldn't help himself.

Slinking low to the ground, blending with the shadows, he enjoyed a powerful and sensual minute control over his muscles that he never had before. When he was close enough, he streaked forward, bounded upward, and clamped his powerful jaws onto the thick haunch that lay on a wooden block on the counter top.

One of the other warriors, human-formed to cook the meal, saw him and ran after him immediately as he bolted away from the kitchen.

Roy streaked along halls, up stairs, over bridges, and down ramps – desperately searching for a place to stop and eat his meal. He'd never smelled or tasted anything so _marvelous_ before—

The meat flew from his mouth when he came to an abrupt halt.

Roy experienced a moment of dizziness as his equilibrium was thrown off balance. When it cleared, he found that he was frozen in a running position; utterly unable to move on his own command.

A pair of sandaled and stocking-covered feet, the ankles protected by bronze armor, entered his field of vision.

"I was rather looking forward to that meal," said Chase calmly, if a trifle coldly.

A second pair of feet came into view, dressed in thick black boots.

"You have an entire herd of cows in your meat freezers," said Jack, his voice amused. "You know he's still new to this cat thing."

"I know he is – but that doesn't mean he is allowed to do as he pleases."

_Oh, you think it's **so** easy,_ sneered Roy in his mind. _Why don't **you** try being an animal for once and see how you like it!_

"I have _been_ an animal, Mustang," said Chase, and his voice went colder. "I still _am_ an animal. When I first came to my dragon form, I was subject to dragon instincts. I greatly disliked being out of control and so did something about it. That means that _you_ will have to do something about _your_ instincts – or I shall do it _for_ you."

A snap of Chase's fingers, and suddenly, Roy could move again.

He shook himself all over, paused to lick furiously at the fur of his left shoulder, and then sat back and glared up at Young, his tail lashing.

_You can hear me?_ he thought within his own mind.

"I can hear you," said Chase, who looked oddly elongated to Mustang's gaze. "That does not mean I _wish_ to."

Roy bared his teeth in a slight snarl.

Chase raised an eyebrow. "I would advise you not to challenge me, Mustang. I would hate for young Elric to return only to collect your _pelt_."

Roy's ears flattened back. _You wouldn't!_

"I would," replied Chase shortly, and kept his gaze locked with Roy.

Jack looked back and forth between the two of them, and then snorted. "Oh, man – is he cattin' off comin' at the boss baller like that?"

Chase rolled his eyes. "How many times have I asked you to _not_ use that urban street-slang around me?"

Jack grinned. "Sorry, Chase. Thought it was kind of ironic."

"I understand: 'Catting off' given that he's a _cat_. However..."

Jack raised his hands and let it go.

_What was he saying?_ asked Roy, confused.

"If I understood it correctly, he was asking if you were actually doing something extraordinarily stupid by challenging me."

The albino youth grinned and nodded. "'Boss Baller' is short for 'boss baller shot caller' – otherwise known as the head of a gang who actually calls the shots."

Roy blinked. _Ah._

Chase snorted. "Don't bother trying to absorb this new information. It is a form of speaking that lacks grace and elegance."

"Says you," muttered Jack. "It's got _rhythm_ , man! _Soul_. Y'know—“

"Spicer."

"Fine, shutting up."

Roy laughed in the privacy of his own mind.

Chase sighed and glanced at the haunch of beef lying nearby. The warrior that had chased Mustang from the kitchen stood at attention only a few feet away.

"Jack is correct when he says the larders of my home are filled with more food. Elanna—“ He glanced at the masked African woman, who bowed immediately; "—see about defrosting a new haunch for dinner."

The warrior bowed again and walked away.

Chase looked down at his new black jaguar. "Enjoy your meal, Mustang. It's all you're getting for a while."

Roy's eyes went wide. _You're going to starve me?!_

"Hardly. Jungle feline metabolisms are such that you only need to eat once every few days." A slow smile. "Since Edward will be back for you relatively soon, I don’t see that I shall need to worry about feeding you too much longer. In fact, since you are currently blocked from performing alchemy, allow me to roast your dinner for you.”

Roy’s eyes widened as a wave of Chase’s hand encased the haunch of beef in a wash of flame. When it died away, the lovely raw scent of animal meat was gone; muted under the smell of char.

He whined, low in his throat, because the smell now made him ill.

“Oh, dear me,” purred Chase wickedly. “I forgot: Felines prefer their meat uncooked. How terrible of me.”

Roy leveled a hateful glare on the man.

“Well, you’re simply going to have to make do with that,” said the dragon-lord with a smirk, gesturing at the hunk of charred meat. “Either that, or wait until I give you leave to eat – as you were supposed to do, anyway.”

Roy growled. _You are so **very** lucky I can’t use my alchemy, Young!_

“Luck? Hasn’t a thing to do with it. I blocked your ability to use your talent on purpose. Your gloves make accessing your talent _handy_ – but they are not required. Had I left you with the ability to activate a transmutation circle, you’d have used your claws to etch several into various points of my home and use them against me by now.”

The two of them stared at each other; one man highly amused and smug in his victory, the other quivering in his fur with barely restrained rage.

“And that settles that,” murmured Chase. He walked past Roy calmly, patted the black jaguar’s head condescendingly, and continued on his way.

Growling hideously, Roy spun around – fully prepared to charge after the man and see if he couldn’t claw his way down to the evil man’s black heart and chew it out of his chest.

He froze when he felt a gun muzzle against the back of his skull.

“Ah-ah,” admonished Jack quietly. “You lost the showdown. You willingly accepted the bet. Now, you deal with the consequences.”

Roy snarled, lashed his tail, and thought nothing. There was no point since Spicer couldn’t hear him.

Seeing that Mustang wasn’t going to attack, Jack pulled his laser pistol away from the alchemist’s dark, furry head and re-holstered it at the small of his back. Then, he walked away; following in Chase’s direction.

Roy watched him go, and then went to sniff sadly at the ruined meat.

_Ed,_ he thought longingly. _Where **are** you?_

 

*~*~*~*

 

Ed gritted his teeth as he was slammed against the side of the car when Havoc spun the wheel to take a corner, suddenly and sharply.

“Hey!” he roared. “I can’t _do_ this if you do shit like that!”

“ _So_ sorry,” growled the blond man hunched over the steering wheel. “You’d rather that freak _catch_ us?”

Behind them, “Breda” was roaring after them on a motorcycle, firing at them with a gun and a crazed grin.

Ed winced and nodded. "Okay, point for you!"

"Edward, do it now!" ordered Hawkeye. "I don't know why you've waited this long, but you can't any longer!"

"But... it's _Envy_. You might—“

"Trust us to protect you, Edward, or we might as well give up now!" she said coldly.

"Grrrrrrrahhh! What is _with_ you people on the _trust_ thing?" Ed snarled, but he pulled the box containing the Jin Dan Ruby from his inner coat pocket.

Opening the box, he took out the ruby, and pointed the pointy end at himself. Beside him, Falman was turned around, facing backwards to fire out of the window whenever there was an opportunity to do so.

"Here goes nothing!" Ed growled through clenched teeth, and sent his will into the stone again.

This transformation was different.

He couldn't feel it happening.

He thought he would – it was his body, after all.

But the sensation of _power_ that flooded his mind acted as a local anesthetic. He was numb to all physical sensation; everything was felt in mind and soul.

Beautiful.

So beautiful.

Warm and cool and tingly all at once.

It reminded him of something.

Of that _dream_.

_Roy..._

 

*~*~*~*

 

Roy blinked and looked around.

He'd had the oddest feeling he'd sensed something.

He paused, waiting, breathless...

...and then, a ferocious itch took up behind his right ear and he shook his head quickly.

Annoyed at the sensation, he corkscrewed his body into place, hoisted a leg, and scratched vigorously.

The itch soon vanished, thankfully. He didn't understand why he had such dry skin, though, in a palace that was riddled with waterfalls.

Indulging in a luxurious stretch, Roy looked around and decided he was bored enough to go scare up Chase.

Sniffing took him along the halls and bridges until he found the dragon-lord at the very top level. The man was perched on an outcropping; balanced on the ball of one foot as he held himself preternaturally still in a pose that _looked_ pretty, but Roy had no idea what was for.

And – he was _precariously_ perched.

The tip of Roy's tail began twitching frenetically.

Highly enamored of this new urge, he flattened himself to the floor and began to slink closer.

He'd gotten close enough and had pulled himself into pounce position when, abruptly, two of Chase's fingers flicked. A thin stream of water from the fountain head the man was perched on zipped backwards through the air and splatted into Roy's face.

The black jaguar yowled and tumbled backwards, swiping at his face and shaking his head wildly. He'd just picked himself up when he felt another splat on his rump and went spinning, yowling again. Hunkered into a corner, he began to lick his backside vigorously.

When he was finally finished, and that heavy _clumping_ feeling was gone, he shook himself all over and stalked forward to glare at the man who'd only moved to shift into a new pose.

_I hardly think that was necessary!_ he snapped at Chase.

"Ah... So it is only playing when _you_ have the upper hand; the element of surprise?" murmured Young.

Roy could _hear_ the smirk in the man's voice and his tail swatted the marble floor angrily.

"Was there any particular reason – besides the obvious – that you were trying to shove me to my possible death?" Chase inquired politely.

_I'm bored,_ grumbled Roy, and he was appalled to hear himself almost whining. _Jack won’t allow me into his lab – something about shedding around his “babies” – and you're playing at being living statuary._

"Go find some of the other warriors; perhaps they'll entertain you."

_They've let it be known they consider me very much an outsider. Too bad; that one female cat that looks like me is quite attractive._

A low, sexy chuckle from the dragon-lord. "I advise you to not push your luck with Whetu. She does not care for the company of males unless it is her idea."

Roy snorted. _Or unless you exercise your power as her master._

Young's thick, luxurious black hair swayed elegantly as he shook his head – and Mustang briefly found himself wondering how he'd look with long hair.

_Probably like a complete idiot,_ he thought privately to himself.

"Yes, you would," agreed Chase, and then he added, "I do not force myself on my warriors."

_Now that you have Jack in your thrall?_ griped Roy waspishly.

"Even before Jack came to me. I take no pleasure in forcing my sexual fervor on an unwilling participant."

_And I suppose your warriors were all willing?_

"My warriors are as they are because they lost in battle to me – you know that."

_So you've never once used them sexually?_

"I did not say that."

Roy was silent for a moment, and then said, _Oh. Whenever you did have sex with them, they were always willing._

Finally, Chase turned to face his newest warrior with a smug grin. Stepping down off the fountain head, he stood before Roy and said, "I can be very charming when I want to be, Mustang."

Roy snorted and said nothing.

A black eyebrow flicked up elegantly. "Why are you inquiring? Are you... lonely?"

Roy's ears flattened backwards. _If I was, I wouldn't be pining for you._

A cruel smile ripped across Young's face. "Ah. Then it is your young paramour whom you long for."

Roy's ears unfolded, flicking forward again, and he sighed quietly.

Abruptly, Chase was crouched down before him, and the big, gloved hands were holding his head. Roy blinked and tensed, shocked, and then submitted to the fingers that dug into the thick ruff around his neck; stroking and massaging.

"Do not give up hope just yet," said Chase quietly. "Edward has been gone for only a few hours—“

_Eight._

"—and things take time. He has made his pledge to you. You would never have gone through with this if you did not trust him."

Roy closed his eyes. _This is making me uncomfortable._

"The petting?"

_Only on a psychological note. The... comforting. It's very strange coming from an evil man._

Chase laughed. "That's what Jack said to me once, but he put it differently. I believe his exact words were: 'Stop being so nice to me. It's weirding me out.'"

Roy whuffed a cat-laugh. _I echo his sentiments._

Chase grinned. Then, slowly, he scowled as he bent closer to peer at Mustang's neck.

_What?_ asked the alchemist nervously.

"You have dandruff. Have you been itching lately?"

_Yes. Lots of itching. My skin is dry._

"Hmmm. You apparently have xeroderma."

_What?_

"Scientific wording meaning 'dry skin'. You're suffering from a deficiency of vitamin A."

_How do you know?_

"There is enough humidity within the mountain to not be the cause of it. Therefore, it's a food source problem. Come with me." Standing, the dragon-lord easily strode away.

Even as he followed, Roy resented that someone who was hundreds of years old could move so well.

To his surprise, they entered the kitchen. Roy sat down and watched as raw liver was taken from the large refrigerator; already diced into handy chunks. Two big handfuls were scooped into a wide, shallow bowl, and then Chase waved his hand over the meat. Roy was vaguely aware of a heat shimmer, but the smell of the meat wasn't charred. In fact, it smelled rich and oily and bloody and delicious.

Chase set the bowl in front of Roy, and then went back to the refrigerator. Roy was suddenly too hungry to be offended by being treated as a pet, and began eating his snack, which was warmer than it should have been for just coming out of the refrigerator. He found himself grateful that Chase had taken the trouble to remove the chill from the meat and bolted his food.

By the time he was done, Chase had assembled another bowl of something for him to have; only this time it was full of liquid and some soft food substance.

_What's this?_ he asked, sniffing at the substance, and wrinkled his nose at the tang of sweet fruit and vegetable.

"A mixture of mashed sweet potatoes, carrots, carrot juice, mangoes, and milk," said Chase. "It tastes better than it sounds or looks. All items are vital sources of vitamin A."

_So was the liver!_

"Mustang, do not fight me on this. I have no qualms about _forcing_ you to drink it."

_But it smells... so not like **meat** ,_ argued Roy.

"I'm aware of that. Choke it down anyway. I am allowing you one last chance to retain your pride."

_At least you didn't mention dignity,_ muttered Roy as he pointedly waved his tail.

"What's undignified about it? You look very elegant in your black coat. Now, _drink_."

Roy shuddered at hearing that steely tone enter the warlord's voice. He knew he was two seconds away from having the choice taken away from him. Steeling himself, Roy crouched down and began lapping.

He reared away almost immediately. _FAUGH! Oh, God... ew!_

He didn't get too far. Almost immediately, he felt Young's magic take hold of him and freeze him into immobility.

A moment later, his body was moved without his telling it to, and he found himself standing on his back legs. His head was tilted back, his jaws open wide, and he was bracing himself against a wall using his front paws.

"Down the hatch," said Young with a smirk, and tipped the bowl he'd placed against Roy's feline lips.

Roy screamed angrily in his mind, unable to articulate it with his physical voice.

 

*~*~*~*

 

Envy was laughing as he crept closer to the group huddled against a crumbling brick wall. His prey had led him into the slums of the city. He figured they'd done it as a means of cutting down on the loss of innocent human life; not that _he_ cared. But humans were frail creatures – most of them incapable of doing what _needed_ to be done even at the expense of others.

His eyes were on the two human boys being carried by the taller, stronger men in the group. Hawkeye and Fuery were standing protectively in front of their companions, guns out and trained on him unwaveringly.

"The Stone works," he said in his husky voice that was a composition of all the voices that made him. "I can see them from here: Alphonse's lovely young body; a flash of skin on Ed's right wrist. You, Falman, are carrying Ed without difficulty. The Stone _works_. And now, I'm going to take it from you."

"No," said Hawkeye coldly, "you are not."

"Oh, no? My companions are coming – Lust and Gluttony. They wouldn't be coming here if they had not defeated Armstrong. They're getting closer all the time. If I adjust my hearing _just_ so, I can hear the broken, cut-off screams of the filthy mortals Gluttony is grabbing for a snack on the run."

The humans shuddered with loathing, but none of them broke visibly.

Envy took another step closer and watched as the guns in the hands of Hawkeye and Fuery shifted minutely to keep him in their sights.

"Oh, come on..." he said, and this time, he morphed into Breda's form and used his voice. "We're all buddies here, aren't we?"

" _You_ ain't. _I_ am."

Envy had barely turned when an iron crowbar crashed into his face. The bones of his nose, cheeks, and brow splintered and were driven back into his brain, killing him instantly.

The _real_ Heymans Breda stepped forward, watching dispassionately as his imposter hit the ground with a hard thump.

"Breda!" shouted Havoc, Falman, and Fuery with glee.

The beefy soldier turned with a grin. His left eye was swollen shut; his left cheek puffy and knotted with contused flesh and the corner of his mouth torn. His uniform wasn't in much better shape.

"Sorry about that," he said to his friends, and showed them the bleeding marks on his arms and wrists. "I got a little tied up in something."

"It's amazing they didn't kill you outright," said Havoc incredulously.

"To do so would be to waste a valuable source of information," said Falman primly.

Hawkeye's only response was to tighten her grip on her pistol and fire.

By the time the bullet passed by him, Breda was just beginning to flinch. The choked gurgle from behind him made him turn in time to see an _immense_ man, his belly round and enormous, fall backwards; a neat bullet hole in his forehead.

The beautiful, curvaceous woman standing behind him was lifting her hand and looking annoyed.

Breda ducked down and rolled out of the line of fire.

Hawkeye pulled the trigger again and again, and the beautiful woman went down with a shot between her large breasts and another in her throat.

"What a fucking waste," Havoc grumbled, watching the sweetly curved body fall.

"Nnnnnngggg..."

Havoc and Falman looked down at Ed as the alchemist stirred in Falman's arms. Nearby, Breda was scrambling to his feet and trotting over to join his companions.

"...r-run..." croaked Ed, his gold eyes opened to slits, staring at the bodies littering the ground.

"Hey, no, relax," said Havoc. "It's okay, Ed – we got 'em."

"...re... anim... ate..."

"'Reanimate'?" echoed the group, giving each other confused looks.

"He means _us_."

Eyes wide, they turned to see Envy getting up onto his feet. His face was grotesque for a moment as bones and flesh, muscles and veins and capillaries knit back together. Close on his heels in reviving were the rotund man and the beautiful woman; their bullet wounds closing and fading away as if they'd never been.

"Like the man said," growled Havoc.

"Run!" shouted Fuery, Breda, and Falman.

Together, Hawkeye and Fuery laid down cover fire that kept the homunculi back, and then they ran after their quickly fleeing friends.

"They just _had_ to trash the car!" wheezed Havoc, running as fast as he could despite the heavy weight of a limp body in his arms.

"We'll find a new one – just keep _going!_ " ordered Falman unnecessarily.

No one needed to be told twice.

 

*~*~*

 

_So, tell me about how you and Jack got together._

Chase snorted. "Why would you want to know about that?"

Roy couldn't shrug very well as he walked; his shoulders were dipping and rolling, fully involved in his jaguar stride.

_I'm curious,_ he replied.

"Not hoping for pointers to acquire your own sweet young thing?"

Mustang laughed. _Please. I'm an accomplished lover._

"Begs the question as to why young Edward is not already gracing your bed."

_He was too young, previously. He's old enough now and holds an emancipated status as it is. Also, he's now vividly aware of what I can offer him. I wasn't about to bring it to him; I wanted him to see it on his own._

"He would be more likely to accept a liaison with you if it's his idea," Chase guessed shrewdly.

_Something like that._

"Hmmm."

They were both silent for a few minutes as they walked through the halls. Chase had no real need to patrol his home, but he wanted to keep Mustang occupied – despite the alchemist nearly shredding his leg when he'd finally released Mustang from his hold after feeding him the liquid. At least he'd waited long enough that Mustang hadn't been able to bring it up again.

Roy edged closer and bumped up against Chase's leg in mid-stride. _So. Tell me._

"Why?"

_I want to know what a pretty thing like Jack sees in you._

Chase glared down at the alchemist-turned-feline.

_What? You'd rather I lie and call him ugly?_

"No – that would be a bigger insult. I do not bed ugly people."

Roy snorted. _Then, take it as the compliment it is: You managed to bag Jack Spicer. He is a beautiful young man. That skin of his looks very soft._

"It is – and _you_ are not going to get your hands _or_ paws on it."

_Wouldn't dream of it, old man._

Chase made a low, growling noise. "Would you prefer to be locked in the smallest cage I can find?"

_No. I want to know how you and Jack got together._

Chase sighed. "I really don't see why I should indulge you."

_You tortured me with strained vegetables._

Young's laughter was low and wicked and full of smug pleasure.

"Very well," Chase said after a moment. "I find myself in a mood to brag of my conquest of Jack Spicer."

Roy wanted desperately to arch an eyebrow. _'Conquest'?_

Chase grinned, utterly pleased with himself. In his mind's eye, the memory of the long seduction of Jack Spicer played out.

"Yes. An enemy of ours – a monk named Omi – had thought to prove himself to be the _shoku_ leader of his teammates by attempting an epic endeavor. He took himself back to the past in order to eradicate evil; namely, by stopping _me_ from ever accepting the demon's offer that gave me my immortality and turned me to evil. Instead, he changed and ruined everything, and one of his teammates proved to have the level-head and determination that saved the day."

_Fascinating. But, what does it have to do with Jack?_

"I'm _getting_ to that, impatient child. Hush so you can hear the story."

_CHILD?_

"If you insist on pointing out our age differences..."

Roy growled. _Fine. Shutting up._

"Thank you. Now, then..." Chase took a moment to organize his thoughts. "When Omi went back in time, he needed to find the Sands of Time to do so. The problem is, is that he was counting on his elder self to tell him where his elder self hid that particular Shen-Gong-Wu during another altercation. He wanted to preserve his youthful strength and elasticity, so he froze himself into hibernation for the next eighty years."

_And by doing so, he effectively removed 'Old Omi' from the timeline._

"Yes. The rest of us, meanwhile, went on our ways. I had not taken Jack as a consort; in fact, I had refused to have anything to do with him. This embittered him, and so he used his brilliance to become Master of the World. Evil Emperor Jack, if you will. He locked me into various torture devices, as well the other truly evil members of the Heylin side. Everyone else was locked into prisons for his personal amusement."

Roy slowed his stride a little bit, frowning as he thought it over. _But... he loves you._

"Yes. He always _has_. When we first met, it was mere hero worship. Somewhere along the way, it developed into a crush, but I spurned him at every opportunity, believing him too weak to be worthy of my time or attention. Then, Omi decided to muck with time. By the time he broke out of hibernation, all of the Shen-Gong-Wu had been found and gathered – including the Sands of Time. Though his friends died trying to distract Spicer's robots, Omi managed to escape into the past where he then changed it."

_If he changed it... how are you evil today?_

"In that alternate timeline, I was the good warrior who had been banished to the future against my friend-turned-foe – Master Monk Guan. I worked with the young monks, trying to help them defeat the Heylin side. We were failing miserably, I might add." Chase smiled a cold grin. "Further proof that I belong on the side of evil."

_Where was Jack?_

"He, oddly enough, had lost every scrap of evil he possessed and was on the side of good. The monks had taken him in, hoping to guide him, but they succeeded only in turning him into a weak-willed, tree-hugging pansy."

Roy wanted to laugh, but kept his silence.

"The leader-apparent figured out what had gone wrong with time and got us to where Omi's frozen form remained hidden. It's a time-within-time loophole and would take too long to explain," Chase clarified when he felt Roy's curiosity warming his brain. "Omi was broken free of his hibernation and prevented from going back into the past. The timeline realigned itself to the way it is _supposed_ to be, here and now."

_If he was prevented from going back to the past, how do you remember all this?_

"Magic loophole. All of us affected felt something shift; only those of us of sufficient power and training were able to access the deleted memories."

_There seem to be a lot of loopholes in this._

"Quite a few. Sanity is maintained by _not_ trying to figure them out."

_Duly noted. So... Jack...?_

"His brain is sufficiently advanced that he, too, remembered the alternate timeline. Not to the extent the rest of us do, but bits and pieces. He was horrified by what he'd done to me. The others, he cared not so much about. But, _me_... that memory disgusted him."

Chase smiled as he thought of Jack's fidgety dismay; the honest torment the youth had suffered under.

"I had fully intended to beat it into him that he was _never_ to think of doing what he'd done when Omi had disappeared – but I didn't have to. Jack was wrecked by his own actions. I watched him, trying to decipher the act, if there was one. But, there was no act; he was thoroughly disquieted by what he'd done to me."

_What did you do next?_

Chase grinned. "I seduced him. I took a long look at the memories I could glean. The entire time he held me captive, he offered me everything he could think of if I would stand beside him; be his consort; share my immortality with him. I turned him down each time, and so he suffered for having no one there to guide him. Likewise in the alternate timeline where he was purely good: Inadequate guidance resulted in Jack Spicer's brilliance and passion being wasted instead of coaxed to their full potential. I despise seeing precious resources wasted."

_Ah. You seduced him to keep him under control; to keep him from ever attempting to lock you up as a prisoner again._

Chase nodded. "It started out that way."

Roy felt his lips curl back and his jaw drop in a heavy feline grin. _**He** seduced **you?**_

"Yes, impudent boy, he did. He wasn't attempting to do so, either. Under my tutelage, he calmed; became more confident of his abilities, his body, and his place in my life. That was all he'd really wanted: to belong to someone worthy of him."

_Egotistical, much?_

"He has the right to be. Jack is the most brilliant mind on this planet."

_Better than you?_ asked Roy snidely.

"You will never hear me admit it out loud," growled Chase.

Roy _did_ laugh, then.

Chase rolled his eyes. "Fortunately, I am his master in all other aspects – and my own intelligence is advanced enough to keep up with his."

_Yes... fortunately,_ Roy agreed, very much tongue-in-cheek. _How did he win you over?_

A warm grin spread across Chase's face. "He fell in love with me. Not simple infatuation; not a love that was dependent on certain factors. That silly, stupid boy loves me entirely. It is very difficult to resist such adoration. No one, in my long life, has ever been so thankful for my life as he is."

_But you're evil. Why would you even need to work at resisting his love? That should come naturally._

Chase laughed. "So certain, are you, that evil cannot love?"

Roy's whiskers twitched. _Evil is... evil._

"You have a lot to learn. The monks claim that the key to their balance is that there is no passion – there is only serenity. What an utter _lie_. Tell me, Roy Mustang." Chase arched an eyebrow at the black jaguar by his side. "What is balance? If I were to take a scale; were to place a speck of salt on one side and a lump of gold on the other, is that balance? Where in the great mystery of life does it state that balance must be attained through denial? The monks draw their peace from the forces of the world that knows what true power is; know how to dominate it and bend it to their will. Yet, when they see this power existing in themselves – this grand potential for _more_ – they run from it, rather than govern it. Denial, alchemist – base cowardice and denial."

_Is it cowardice to choose to bend through life, rather than bull your way through it? To go with the flow of the life-force around you, rather than jar it discordantly?_

"Very pretty, very poetic. Very _zen_ , as my Jack would say. But, consider this, Roy Mustang – the nature of passivity is to yield." A wicked smile. "Fire does not yield; it is beaten into submission. You know that very well."

_Being ambitious does not make me evil!_

"No – but the potential is there. You simply choose to deny yourself the possession of everything you _could_ be for some misguided concept that you will lose what you _are_."

Roy said nothing.

"I am as capable of love as I am of hatred; cold, callous murder as well as preserving others' lives. I do not hold myself rigidly to others' conceptions of what evil _should_ be. Instead, I am everything I _want_ to be. I love Jack Spicer; it is a _dark_ love, to be sure, but it _is_ love."

Mustang was silent for a while. Then, finally, he said, _I hope Jack realizes how lucky he is that Omi intervened when he did._

Chase laughed. "Believe me, he regularly sends an anonymous gift to the young monk in silent thanks. He is all too aware of how close we came to disaster."

Roy nodded and stayed silent. He only hoped that he and Ed had a chance to avoid their own disaster.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"Whose brilliant, fucking idea was it to hide in the _slums?_ " growled Breda as he watched the advancing homunculi. His forehead was beaded with sweat; the armpits and neck of his undershirt were stained with it; his abraded wrists and arms stung like a bitch because of the salt. He was completely out of ammo, and he was terrified of these horrible monsters.

But, he would go do down fighting, right to the very end.

He wouldn't tarnish Mustang's name by leaving evidence that the colonel hadn't done his part as a commanding officer.

"Can we play the Blame Game _later?_ " snarled Havoc around his ever-present cigarette. He had two shots left in his gun, and he was saving them. For what, he wasn't sure. Every time he'd fired, the bullet holes had closed after the bullets had popped back out of the targets and the alchemic monsters had _kept coming forward._

"If there _is_ a later," said Falman grimly.

"Colonel Mustang wouldn't leave us without any form of defense," said Hawkeye staunchly, sighting along the barrel of her own gun, aiming directly at Envy's forehead.

"Mustang's in another _dimension!_ " squeaked Fuery, his eyes wide behind his glasses. "I know he's great, and all, but how's he supposed to help us?"

Envy's husky laugh rippled through the air, echoed by Gluttony's snicker and Lust's smirk.

"That's the point, little mouse," sneered the homunculus. "Your beloved leader _can't_ help you. He's left you saddled with two useless alchemists—“

Envy barely dodged the cement spikes that were flung at his head directly after the sound of a clap and a flash of blue light.

"Useless, hah?" growled Ed as he wobbled forward on unsteady legs. His gold eyes were narrowed and full of hatred. "Not as useless as you!"

"Oh, yes, very original comeback," taunted Envy. "I'm far more useful than _you_ are, boy. I can be anyone... anything." The homunculus flicked a wicked grin at Hawkeye and melted effortlessly into Mustang's form, Mustang’s voice. "How about it, Lieutenant Hawkeye? You know the fastest way to get promoted is to sleep your way to the top. And it wouldn't be a hardship for you to ride ‘The Pony’ all the way up to the rank of General..."

Hawkeye's response was to calmly, coldly, fire a bullet directly between Envy's eyes.

The homunculus fell back, hitting the ground limply, and Lust glanced at her fallen teammate for a brief moment before casually slicing her talons forward; intent on crippling Hawkeye in such a way that the woman would never be able to fire a gun again.

Lust's aim was thrown off as the ground beneath her violently erupted. She sprawled atop the square column of earth, her balance lousy, and hadn't any time to make a sound as she was crushed upwards through the ceiling of the floor above the combatants.

And up through the next floor.

And the next.

And the next, until she finally was crushed up into the roof of the derelict building and pinned there.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! Not my _Lust!_ " yowled Gluttony. Agonized rage powered the rotund homunculus, and he lumbered forward, already unhinging his jaw for a massive bite.

At the same time, Envy reanimated and assumed the form of a werewolf – all long, strong limbs, and claws, and teeth – and leaped towards the group.

The last round of ammo was spent from whoever had any into knocking the two homunculi back, but it only worked with Envy. Gluttony staggered slightly, and then continued forward, keening angrily, and the defenders scattered.

Breda, who'd grabbed Ed, kept the young alchemist upright, while Falman caught hold of Al, who was groggily coming awake. They regrouped along another wall, keeping their backs protected.

Havoc, Fuery, and Hawkeye hurried over and closed ranks in front of their fellow soldiers to help guard the teenagers.

At that moment, the ceiling was sliced apart above the defenders. A talon plunged downwards, nicking through the outside of Riza's right arm, and she hissed in pain as she ducked away from what would have been a killing stroke had the talon come down just a little more to the left.

Lust – still a bloody mess; her body working to pull itself back together – rode the shrinking of her talons down to the ground.

Her appearance derailed Gluttony's attack. Wheeling around, the killing light gone from his eyes, he babbled deranged, happy noises and moved to hug and support his surrogate mother.

And, once again, everyone gathered back into their little groups: Homunculi on one side, Mustang's crew on the other.

"Nice try, sheep," laughed the werewolf-Envy tauntingly. "You're out of ammunition and not one of _you_ has the strength to hold even one of _us_ off. If you step away from the Elric boys, kneel down and close your eyes, we'll make your deaths _quick_. How's that for a deal?"

"How about this," countered Ed, lifting his head from where it had been lounging wearily against Breda's chest. "Mustang's crew stays alive. My brother and I stay alive. You shut the hell up and leave before I fry you like a bug under a welding torch, level HQ just to make sure I've gotten rid of _all_ of you, and hand what's left of it over to Mustang so _he_ can be the next Fuhrer."

The condescending smiles fell from the homunculi’s faces and they readied themselves to attack.

Ed felt movement beside him. A dark grin of his own took him, because he knew that fidgety movement.

He would know it anywhere.

From somewhere he didn't know, strength flowed into him. Smoothly, he stood and stepped forward, away from Breda.

In perfect step beside him was Al, also imbued with that same strength, that same grace and confidence.

In unison, they clapped their hands together, perfectly focused.

Hand over hand over hand over hand, they twined their arms through each other's and gripped the Philosopher's Stone tightly in their hands.

The homunculi were just beginning to give outraged shrieks when a powerful blast of red light erupted from the stone and washed over the alchemic monsters.

When the light faded several moments later, there wasn't a piece of evidence to indicate anyone had been standing across from Mustang's crew.

All trace of Envy, Lust, and Gluttony were gone.

Ed and Al collapsed, so utterly limp with exhaustion they had no control over their descent.

Havoc and Falman caught Al; Breda scooped up Ed.

And then, as the building shook and trembled and began crashing down around them, Mustang's crew ran like buggery for the exit.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"So... You ready to go?" Ed asked his brother, his eyes drinking in the sight of Al's smooth skin and ruffled sandy-brown hair.

Al's brown eyes sparkled with excitement. "You bet, Brother! Going to a new _world?_ How many times does anyone get a chance like that?"

"Without going through the Gate of Truth, anyway," snorted Ed as he twitched his new red coat around his shoulders.

Al grinned, a bright cheery expression, and Ed felt his heart beat a little bit harder.

_I did it,_ he thought, and flexed his flesh-and-bone right arm; his flesh-and-bone left leg. _I put us back the way we're supposed to be. I kept my promise. And now, I'm gonna go keep another one._

"Are you sure you don't want any of us to come along, Edward?" asked Hawkeye softly, her eyes solemn as always. Her right arm rested comfortably in a sling; her wound stitched together for healing.

Ed nodded. "I'm sure. If anyone else other than Al comes back with me, that whack-job lizard-freak will probably think I'm trying to go back on my deal." He grinned a sly smile and jerked his thumb at Al. "Besides, look at him. Al looks like he wouldn't hurt a fly. Nobody would know he can blow up a mountain if he wants to."

"Not that I would," added Al, shoving at Ed playfully, "but Brother _does_ have a good point."

"I always have good points!" retorted Ed hotly.

"Uh-huh," said everyone gathered around in a tone of disbelief.

Ed glared at them all: Hawkeye, Havoc, Fuery, Breda, Falman, and Al.

"I hope you all bloat up and die of horrible diseases," he said meanly.

"Brother," sighed Al in that tone that was purely exasperated affection.

"Let's just _go_ , alright?" Ed growled, and he pulled the Sì Xing Máng out of his pocket.

Al nodded and stepped up to press tightly against his brother's side and put his hand over Ed's upturned palm; the red, eight-rayed ruby held firmly between the two of them.

Ed had a moment of worry. _What if I do it again? What if I lose Al?_

He forced the thoughts away. He couldn't afford them, now. With a nod to the waiting soldiers, he said, "We'll be back as soon as possible."

And then, he thought himself and his brother to the mountain where Mustang waited.

 

*~*~*~*

 

"Alright, you scaly bas—WHOA!"

Ed, in the midst of announcing his return to the mountain, went down in a flurry of limbs and red coat as a very large black cat pounced him out of nowhere.

"Brother!" gasped Al, and he was already moving to clap his hands together, only to stop when he heard Ed's annoyed splutter.

"Damn it, Mustang! Get off me! Your breath _stinks!_ " Ed growled, twisting his face away from the tongue that was slobbering licks all over his skin.

The black jaguar growled and continued to lap at Ed's face, his tail lashing, his whiskers twitching.

"Colonel...?"

The soft, hesitant voice caught Mustang's attention, and he lifted his head, his tongue still sticking out, and looked for the source.

His eyes widened when he saw a young man, dressed neatly in brown trousers, a blue suit-shirt, and a brown suit-jacket. Caramel-blond hair fluffed over eyes that were a sort of hazel-gray-brown mix. The features somewhat resembled Ed, but the soul behind those unusual eyes was very, very familiar.

Mustang let out a happy yowl and pounced on Al, and when the younger Elric brother was down on the ground, he began licking _that_ Elric's face, too.

"Stop doing that with my _brother_ , you pervert furball!" Ed hollered, and he tackled the jaguar.

Mustang snickered inside his mind. _Oh, no, I don't **think** so, Ed!_ he thought to himself, and used his animal agility to slink out of Ed's grasp before turning and pinning the young alchemist down with the weight of his feline flesh and bone and muscle.

Ed gave a wheezing gasp and his eyes popped open wide.

"I take it your trip was a success," drawled an amused voice from behind the small group.

Mustang moved off of Ed at once and the two Elrics scrambled to their feet and faced the owner of the voice.

Al's eyes widened at the sight of so many large cats, the Xingian-looking man in armor, and the creature with white skin and red eyes standing beside him.

He leaned over and whispered, "Are you sure they're not homunculi, Brother?"

"Pretty sure," replied Ed, and then he walked forward to meet Chase; Mustang beside him and Al hurrying to catch up.

"I'm back," he announced unnecessarily. "I fixed my brother and me, too."

Chase glanced at the young man with hair the color of damp sand, and nodded politely. Then, he grinned darkly at Edward.

"His aura is as bright as yours. I wonder which of you would win if the two of you had an alchemic battle?" he mused aloud.

Al's eyes widened dramatically and Ed's narrowed as he bared his teeth angrily.

Chase smirked at his lover. "Pay up."

Jack shook his head. "Sucker bet. It was obvious they'd hide his abilities if he had any."

"If? _If?_ My little brother can _so_ kick your ass if he wants to!" snarled Ed, pointing an enraged finger at Jack.

Jack sneered and crossed his arms over his chest. "I have better things to do than let you goad me into a totally pointless fight. Hand over the damned 'Wu and get the hell out of here, would you?"

Two bright spots of dusky pink appeared on Ed's cheeks as his glower darkened considerably. His teeth were audibly grinding.

Al sighed and reached out to pluck at Ed's sleeve. "Brother... Just make the transaction, would you? I don't think it's in a mood to indulge your posturing."

Jack's eyes narrowed drastically. "I am _not_ an 'it'!" he growled. "The name is Jack Spicer. Know it and fear it, Pinocchio."

Al blinked. He knew he'd just been insulted, but the true meaning of it escaped him. "Pin- _what?_ "

Chase smiled lazily. "The character in a fairytale about a wooden puppet who wished more than anything to be a real, flesh-and-blood boy."

The meaning of the insult slammed home to both Elrics, and identical expressions of "Oh, no, you did _not_ just say that!" fixed on their faces.

Chase raised an eyebrow. "Are we going to make the trade or not? Speaking for myself, I wouldn't mind adding one such as your Colonel Mustang to the ranks of my warriors."

Mustang stood completely still and stared straight ahead, standing at attention; not betraying an iota of his nervousness.

Ed's hand reached down and twined in the black ruff of fur around his neck, and Roy shivered slightly.

"Over my dead body," growled the young alchemist possessively.

"If you insist," murmured Chase with a taunting smile. "I would much rather add you to the ranks as well."

Ed opened his mouth to snarl something, but Mustang stepped heavily on Ed's left foot, and the blond teenager yelped and looked down at the jaguar.

Roy bared his fangs and made a low, growling sound; the look in his eyes warning Ed to not even _think_ about letting such a thing happen.

"What?" grumbled Ed defensively. "I wasn't about to—“

"Brother," cut in Al, and there was a teasing smile on the fourteen-year-old's face, "you absolutely were."

Ed rolled his eyes and looked away, muttering.

Mustang knocked his body against Ed's leg, making the short alchemist stumble, and gave a perfunctory grunt.

"Alright already, Colonel Bossyboots!" snapped Ed.

Jack muffled his laughter behind one hand and Chase tightened his control over his own urge to laugh, and held out his hand expectantly.

Ed shook his head furiously. "Not until you change him back."

"So you can run with your sugar-daddy _and_ the Jin Dan Ruby?" snapped Jack. "I don't think so, Pixie."

Both Mustang and Al moved to keep Ed in place when the short alchemist instinctively began to lunge towards Jack for the effrontery.

" _Who are you calling so small he's a winged blue fairy?!_ " Ed howled at the top of his lungs.

Jack made a show of looking around before smirking at Ed and saying, "You."

Ed released a rant of garbled growls, grunts, and slurred death threats.

"I'm sorry... what was that? I don't speak gnomish," said Jack with a grin, digging his verbal claws in a little deeper.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!"

Al and Roy struggled harder to keep Ed in place as the Fullmetal Alchemist began thrashing wildly and foaming at the mouth, glaring at Jack with murder in his eyes.

Chase laughed quietly and shook his head. "Enough, Spicer. As amusing as it is to watch you use Elric's insecurities against him most effectively—“

"Who's insecure?! Not me! I know I'm the best of the brightest alchemists and I can _totally_ beat the crap out of all of you and let me _go_ , Al—!“

"No!" shouted Al, and Mustang backed him up with a roar.

Chase sighed. Childish tantrums could only amuse him so long. Then, there was what Jack had said only moments ago: they both had better things to do than drag this out any longer than necessary.

" _Enough_ ," he said harshly, and he lifted a hand and splayed his fingers briefly before curling them around empty air.

Immediately, Ed's body went utterly immobile; every inch of him locked into stillness.

"What did you do?" cried Al, turning to face the dark warrior.

"I will let him move again and _stay_ mobile if he proves he can behave like an _adult_ instead of a spoiled rotten _brat_ ," said Chase acidly. "He is sixteen and has lived the life of a soldier. By now, he should know how to conduct himself."

Al opened his mouth to retort, but closed it with a weary sigh a moment later. There was nothing he could say to that – Ed really did act like a kid a lot of the time.

Mustang gave a low, rumbling growl and a slight shake of his head; agreeing the only way he could.

Ed, able to see and hear and think, called them both every filthy name he could think of in the arena of his mind.

Chase smirked. "I will let him go. If he continues to stamp his feet and scream like a child, I will freeze him again and _you_ , on your brother's behalf, will return the Jin Dan Ruby to me. He may complete the task himself if he can comport himself as the adult he is supposed to be."

"He's not _supposed_ to be an adult," growled Al. "He's supposed to be a sixteen-year-old kid!"

"Oh, for the love of all things nuclear!" said Jack with heated frustration. "Is this the part where you whine out your little sob-story about your hard-knock life? Because, really, I'm in no mood to hear it. Things happened the way they did. You adapted, you survived, you've lived to tell your grandkids about it. Save it for them and just get _on_ with it, will ya?"

Al glared at the white-skinned man and then looked at Chase.

Chase smiled, slow and charming, and tilted his head towards Jack. "What he said."

Al crossed his arms over his chest and glared at Ed instead. He wanted to get away from this place of madness more than anything.

Ed saw the look in Al's eyes and silently acquiesced. He didn't want to, but he also didn't want to risk losing Al again so soon after getting him back. And if he pushed the dragon-man too far and too hard on this....

The freezing hold on his body vanished elegantly and Ed wobbled only slightly as he regained control of his limbs. He took a deep breath, and another, and forced himself to be as calm and cool as he could be.

Reaching into the pocket of his coat, he drew out the Jin Dan Ruby and threw it at Chase.

One hand came up just in time to keep the Shen-Gong-Wu from splatting into the warlord's face.

Chase curled his fingers around the 'Wu easily and grinned at Ed. "A pleasure doing business with you, Mister Elric."

A snap of his fingers, and Mustang's jaguar body began growing upwards; the fur receded; and in only a few seconds, a tall, uniformed man stood where the jaguar had been.

Al glomped Roy in a hug and Mustang wrapped an arm around the young teenager's back, patting it gently. He kept his gaze on Chase and Jack and asked, "Are we done here?"

Chase nodded. Turning slightly, he snapped his fingers at some of his warriors and they stepped forward with carry-sacks in their mouths, bulging with three-ring binders filled with diagrams and notes.

"Here are the weapons schematics you were interested in. I'm certain that you can apply the basic principles of the creation process to _other_ areas, should you wish to," said Chase smoothly.

The two Elrics and Mustang took two sacks each. Ed and Roy's training, and their pride, wouldn't allow them to grunt at the unexpected weight. Al had no such problem, although he quickly stood straight and tall, the carry sack straps pressing tightly into his fingers.

"Well done, all of you," said Chase. "It has been interesting meeting you. Now, kindly take yourselves home and don't come back."

"What... We just get to walk out of here with the relocation ray thingy?" asked Ed, purposefully not using the real name of the device.

"There's a rule about Shen-Gong-Wu possession," said Jack with a light smirk. "Since it was in your land and in your hands when you came here, technically, it's yours - especially as, even though Chase won it during the Showdown, he made returning it to you part of the wager. We _could_ steal it if we wanted to, but we'd rather you just got the hell on out of here. Or, we could engage in another Xiaolin Showdown."

Ed, Al, and Roy looked at each other for a moment.

Then, they turned their attention back to Chase and Jack.

"Pass," all three said at once.

"I thought you might," drawled Chase. "Go while the going is good, alchemists. Delay much longer, and I will gladly add you to my army of warriors."

"Thanks, no," said Ed caustically. He, Al, and Mustang all backed away.

Roy and Al clustered around Ed, reaching out to hold onto the ruby Ed held in his left hand, the carry-sacks in his right.

"It's been fun," Ed called out, his tone indicating that the meeting had been anything but. "Next time, we'll do lunch in _our_ world."

"Oh, fuck, _please_ don't let there be a next time!" said Jack fervently, rolling his eyes towards the ceiling.

"We finally agree," muttered Al. He looked at his sibling. "Can we go now, Brother?"

Ed nodded. "Let me do the driving."

Mustang refrained from making a sarcastic remark, even though it was a prime opening. Instead, he nodded, just as Al did.

Ed closed his eyes and concentrated.

A moment later, all three of them vanished from Chase Young's home.

" _Finally_ ," growled Jack, and he caught hold of Chase and pulled his lover in for a hot, deep kiss.

 

*~*~*

 

"Sir!"

"Colonel Mustang!"

"Mustang!"

"Colonel!"

The glad calls of Mustang's troops filled the room as Roy reappeared in his office, with Ed and Al in tow.

A moment later, he found himself caught up in a hug from Havoc before being whirled to the center of the group and pounded on the back with manly slaps from Breda, Falman, and even Fuery.

"It is good to have you back, sir," said Hawkeye in her classic, cool manner.

"Thank you, Lieutenant," he said with a nod and a smile. He saw the glitter of relief and her affection for him in her eyes, and knew he had to find some way of easing her out of that way of thinking before he could begin anything with Ed. His second-in-command was a great soldier and a good woman, and he didn't want to alienate her on any front.

"What was it like, sir?" asked Fuery, peeping up at him through those round-lensed glasses, and Roy fought the urge to ruffle the young soldier's hair playfully.

"It was... different," said Roy with as much dignity as he could. "It isn't every day one travels to another world and turns into a cat."

Eyes went wide all around.

"A _cat?_ " yelled every last one of his troops, and Roy whirled to glare angrily at Ed.

"All I told 'em was that you were being held for ransom by that sleazy son of a bitch!" Ed yelled defensively. "What? You _wanted_ 'em to know you were busy licking your own furry ass and hornking up hairballs?"

"FULLMETAL!"

Ed dropped the carry-sacks he'd been holding, tossed the Sì Xing Máng to Al, and took off running.

He barely dodged the fireball that followed him through the door of Mustang's office.

"See if I ever rescue your ungrateful hide again!" Ed howled as he ran off down the hallway.

"Ed screaming and the smell of brimstone in the air," said Havoc with glee. "Yep... things are back to normal around here!"

"Not entirely so," said Riza with a fond smile at Al, who blushed and scrubbed at the back of his hair.

Roy nodded as he slowly drew in his temper. He had a _right_ to be angry. The little snot could have _warned_ him about what had been said and what hadn't been!

"True," he said, and his voice was still edgy with irritation. He let go of it, for the most part, as he grinned at Al. He reached out and ruffled the alchemist's hair and had to wonder at himself for this strange urge to muss the people closest to him. "Have you contacted the Rockbells, yet?"

Al shook his head. "We wanted to wait until we'd gotten you back."

"Well, you have and here I am and here you are and there you go to the phone, young man," said Roy with a grin, pointing at the telephone on his desk. "Put the call on my tab, but be careful about what you say: It's a military phone."

Al gave Roy a salute and a grin. "Sir, yes, sir!"

Roy rolled his eyes towards the ceiling. " _Why_ can't Ed do that? _Why?_ "

"Because you'd most likely die of heart failure if he did, sir," said Hawkeye with a perfectly straight face, and her teammates burst out laughing.

Roy grinned as he thought of the highly excitable Edward Elric. "You're probably right, Lieutenant. Here's hoping he continues to yell at me for a long, long time."

"I really don't think there's going to be a problem with that, sir," said Fuery with a grin, and that set the tone as the cat-calling and teasing began.

Al, over by the desk, finished dialing the Rockbells' number and turned so he could block some of the sound.

Eventually, the call was put through, and a voice that made his entire body thrill answered the phone.

"Rockbell Automail Service," said a young, no-nonsense female voice.

"Winry?"

"Who is... Al?"

"Hi, Winry."

" _Al!_ "

A grin spread, fast and wide and clear, across Al's face at the joy in Winry's voice.

*~*~*

Much, much later, a knock sounded at Mustang's office door.

"Come in," said Roy, and he prepared to stand up to meet another officer.

To his surprise, Ed stepped inside, seeming almost hesitant to do so.

"Ed? What's wrong?" he asked, and stood up anyway. If something was bothering Ed... If some _body_ had bothered Ed....

"Nothin'," grumbled the young alchemist, and he kicked the door shut with his usual brash manner. Hands in the pocket of his coat, Ed stalked forward. In the light of the single lamp turned on in the office, his colors seemed muted; all except for the gold of his hair and his eyes, burning like the sun.

He seemed surprised when Roy set aside the glass of scotch he’d been sipping and came around the desk to meet him halfway.

"If nothing's wrong, then why do you look so down in the dumps?" teased Roy lightly.

"I'm not! Just..." Ed shrugged. He really didn't know how to put what he was feeling into words.

Roy decided that if this was going to happen, he'd have to be the one to lead the dance, so to speak.

"I want to say thank you," he began honestly. When gold eyes flicked to him curiously, he grinned and said, "That was... amazing, really, that you gave up the Philosopher's Stone just to get me back where I belonged."

"Don't you mean the Jin Dan Ruby?" sneered Ed.

"A stone by any other name..." Roy parodied, and they both grinned at each other.

The smile faded from Ed's face quickly, and he shrugged again. "Yeah, well... I've kind of gotten used to having you around, Colonel Bastard." A mulish look that dared Roy to say the wrong thing speared up to Roy's obsidian gaze.

Mustang shook his head slowly; a charming, lopsided smile quirking one corner of his mouth.

"Ed... you don't have to defend your choice," he said quietly. "I'm thrilled that I even _rank_ as a choice - and surprised. I never expected this from you."

"Yeah, well... I'm sure it's just a stupid crush," Ed grumbled, and his face was hot with a fantastic blush as he hunched into his shoulders. "I'm not done growing, yet – maturing! I mean, maturing! An-Anyway... I might get over it... I might not. I don't know. This is kinda weird for me, Mustang. I always thought—“

"Roy."

Ed blinked and looked up at the older man. "Huh?"

"My name. Say it." The predatory look in Mustang's eyes let the younger alchemist know that the colonel wasn't taking "no" for an answer.

Ed licked his lips, quickly, and said, "R... Roy."

Roy's eyelids went heavy-lidded; slanting and elegant and the look in those black eyes made Ed feel very, very hot.

"Yes," murmured Roy. His voice was slow; smoky and sensual, and hearing it made Ed shiver roughly. "Say it again."

"Roy," Ed repeated without hesitation. "Roy. Roy..."

Mustang caught hold of Ed's arms and pulled the younger man slowly against him, and then wrapped his arms around Ed's upper back, anchoring Elric against him.

"You'll never know how long I've waited to hear you say that," Roy said with a dangerous smile.

"Col—Roy," said Ed, but he wasn't pushing away, no matter how anxious he was.

“I knew you were going to grow up fast,” murmured Roy, bending to touch his forehead to Fullmetal’s. “I knew you were going to have to do it hard. I hated that you had to grow up like that, but it’s like Spicer said: you adapted; you lived. You’ve done _great_ , Ed.”

The blond alchemist forced a grin onto his face. “Well… yeah. I have, haven’t I?”

Roy snickered and Ed’s grin melted into a true smile.

“Even at twelve, despite being an obnoxious brat, you were already such a serious little adult,” continued Mustang after a moment. “I thought about what you’d be like when you actually _were_ an adult.”

“Oh, yeah?” breathed Ed, curious. He liked this closeness; liked how warm and cozy it was, being with Mustang like this.

“Yes. Most of the time, I hoped you wouldn’t be too wrecked by your experiences; that you’d still be young enough at heart to enjoy Al when you got him back.”

Ed closed his eyes. “You’re such a sentimental schmuck.”

Roy laughed. “When I’m not being a bastard, you mean.”

“Yeah.”

They were quiet for a few moments as they absorbed the sensation of holding each other; of resting together, warm and safe.

Then, Roy asked, “So, when do you and Al go back for a visit to Risembool?”

Ed frowned. “We’re… ah… not going back for a visit.”

Roy blinked. “Tell me that doesn’t mean—“

“Mus—Roy… I only signed up for this gig to find a way to fix Al and me. We’ve been fixed. It’s time to go home.”

“And do _what?_ Become farmers in the dell?”

Ed grimaced. “No! I was thinking that Al and I could work with Winry on those schematics—“

Roy’s eyes narrowed. “I need those schematics for… military purposes.” He was careful, so careful, to not say what specifically out loud.

“I know. I made copies. One set for me, one for you. I thought maybe I’d show them to Winry and the three of us could work on adapting the engineering for _other things. And that’s only _after_ she’s done losing her mind over the new metallurgy for automail.”_

“And when you get bored of that? What then?”

Ed shook his head. “There’s so much there. He might be a – well, no, he _is_ a jerk, but I can’t deny it: Spicer’s a fuckin’ genius. There’s a lot of work that can be done—“

“By a mechanic. What about an _alchemist?_ What are you going to do? Be the patcher-upper for whatever gets broken in Risembool?” countered Mustang.

The younger alchemist frowned. He hadn’t really thought about it. For as long as he could remember, his plan had been to fix himself and Al, and then go _home_.

“…But I don’t have a home there,” he murmured to himself, staring blankly at Roy’s chest. “Not anymore.”

The colonel extrapolated from that comment and followed the line of thought. “You could still have a home here. You could let Al go back and stay there. He’s the one who wants the quiet life… with Winry. But there are still four more homunculi here. And… I was hoping…”

Ed looked up to meet Mustang’s gaze unflinchingly. “What, Roy?”

“For two things, really: that you would stay for me, so we can explore this new relationship between us, and that you would help me in my plans.”

Fullmetal knew what those plans were; he and Roy had discussed it before, several times. Trying for a light and teasing tone, he said, “I’m not sure it’d be much different from what we have now. You’re a bastard, after all.”

“I’m a sentimental schmuck, too,” Roy reminded him, matching his tone, and nuzzled against Ed’s face.

Ed gasped, startled at the electric thrill that swept through him from the caress.

“You don’t have to stay in the military,” offered Roy. “You could maneuver around as a private citizen.”

“As private as my life gets when everyone knows what I’m capable of,” said the younger alchemist acerbically.

“You’re the one who made a name for yourself,” teased Roy.

Ed laughed, but then sighed a few seconds later.

“Where will I stay if I do stay here in Central? Especially as a private citizen? Without military amenities or funding….”

Roy frowned. “A few tongues would wag – the malicious gossip-mongers at work – but if anyone asked about you staying at my place, no one would think it odd that your former sponsor would provide you with room and board. And since you’ve made a name for yourself, you can get a job practically anywhere.”

“No research labs,” grunted Ed. “Guarantee they’re all either connected to the military or being secretly run by the homunculi.”

“Which are one and the same,” whispered Roy, and his grip tightened. “At least we’re down three. Too bad you didn’t have time to take out the rest.”

“I could have delayed longer… gone hunting,” countered Ed. He met the older man’s gaze. “I didn’t want to leave you alone that long.”

Roy’s eyes widened. “Ed… I really think I have to kiss you now.”

Ed nodded. “Okay.”

It started off slow: A touch of lips to lips, soft, caressing, questioning. When Ed didn’t flinch away, Roy added more pressure; his mouth nipping and pressing and pulling in an enticing way. Ed went stiff with shock at how good it felt, and Roy made a low, pleased rumbling noise that reminded the shorter alchemist of the jaguar form Mustang had been locked into briefly.

Then, surprisingly, he felt the light touch of Roy’s tongue touching in the small gap between his parted lips, and Ed’s mouth opened wider on a gasp.

Roy didn’t take the obvious path. He continued to kiss gently at Ed’s lips, with the occasional touch of his tongue; allowing his young love to become used to the sensation.

When Ed’s hands tightened on his shoulders and he made an impatient sound, Roy smiled, briefly, and then deepened the kiss.

_Yes,_ thought Ed, letting his eyes close as he gave himself to the moment and the man holding him.

_Yes,_ thought Roy, thanking Fate for sending Ed into his life as he took the offering.

_Yes, yes, yes._

 

*~*~*~*

 

"Yes," said Jack on a low moan; “this is more like it.” 

His thigh muscles were tight; controlling his upwards/downwards motion as he slowly rode Chase.

They were once again curled together on Chase's throne, both of them instinctively wanting to pick up where they'd left off during Mustang's and Elric's arrival. In very little time, they had both stripped naked, Jack had been prepared, and then he had eagerly settled himself astride his beautiful, evil lover and settled down on Chase's cock, taking the man deep inside his body.

"Under the circumstances," Chase growled, kissing and biting at Jack's left collarbone, "I have to agree." His hips shifted minutely, aiding his young lover's motion.

"Wanted this," said Jack, and his head tilted back, baring his neck invitingly. He closed his eyes, concentrating fully on the way Chase felt against his hands, his skin, inside him. "Wanted you... always want you. Chase; perfect, beautiful Chase..."

Chase made a desperate noise. He caught hold of Jack's head and held the albino youth still just long enough to bite a spectacular bruise onto that moon-white throat, and then he tugged until he could kiss Jack's mouth, deeply, adoringly, as the rhythm of his hips picked up.

Jack gasped wildly into Chase's mouth, and then hung on tightly, riding Chase's motion as he kissed and kissed and kissed; desperate for Chase's taste and touch.

Escalating cries of frantic passion filled the air. Scratches and bruises were marked into white skin; black hair was pulled in a frenzy of desire. They rocked and arched and thrust together wildly, needfully.

"Ahhh... ahhh! Ohhh! Chaaaaaa _aaaaaase!_ " Jack screamed, before his language centers shorted out in his brain, and he was reduced to base instinct. His body jolted, riding desperately on his lover's cock, and his hand scrabbled blindly between them until he got a solid grip on his own erection. He stroked hard, once, twice, and then sobbed brokenly as he came, hard and fast; his hips jittering in his pleasure.

Chase snarled, holding back long enough for his young lover to ride out his orgasm, and then took his own. His hips thrust so hard, his back arched so powerfully, that the most he could do was protect Jack from being damaged as they slid off the sweat-slick seat and crashed to the floor.

Bracing his palms on the marble floor, his nails gouging furrows in the stone, Chase fucked through the last, powerful sensations of his own orgasm. He was mindless with ecstasy as he came inside his lover; moving on instinct to take the pleasure he craved.

Eventually, his body was sated, and Chase groaned harshly as he folded down to rest with Jack, half-atop and half-beside the utterly limp teenager.

They lay where they'd fallen and dozed there; Jack warm enough beside his fiery half-dragon lover that the chill of the marble floor didn't bother him overly much.

When they finally roused, Chase kissed the albino youth gently and said, "Worth waiting for."

Jack made a pleased sound and kissed back, before pulling back enough to grin tiredly at the older man. "Always."

Chase's answering smirk was equally exhausted.

"Do you have enough energy to clean up?" he asked.

"You have _got_ to be kidding. You blew the top of my head off!" laughed Jack weakly.

"That's what I thought. Hang on, then – this is going to be a short trip."

Chase concentrated his magic and his willpower. An instant later, he and Jack were lying in his bed, in the same position they'd been sprawled in on the floor.

A pair of feline servants came growling into the room. Leaning up on the mattress, the jungle-cat warriors caught hold of the covers in their teeth and shifted the covers around until they were settled over the exhausted men.

Chase and Jack were sound asleep before the warriors had padded from the room.

 

End


End file.
